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Dear Wendy
Dear Wendy

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Viewing 12 posts - 1 through 12 (of 78 total)
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  • in reply to: Struggling and unclear #1099221
    Karebear1813
    Participant

    LW – you should try interning in areas that interest you with filming to gain an idea of what the industry is like and to help get a foot in the door.

    You could also look up Youtube videos regarding workplace issues and how to address these issues or how to navigate around them.

    The market is flooded with jobs right now so there is no excuse to not have SOMETHING! Even if it isn’t ideal to your career, it’s a start and its a way of developing/gaining workplace skills.

    If you don’t like engaging with coworkers/bosses maybe start your own business or find a job that is less customer interactive. Ex. Become a maid/housecleaner

    You cant go around life accusing everyone and everything as “toxic”. Part of adulting is learning to become independent and learning how to manage, not avoid, conflict but to address conflict head on in a mature way.

    Right now you do have support from your parents with a roof over your head and food in your stomach with very little responsibilities.

    I agree therapy would be great but even if parents have insurance, there could be out of pocket cost that LW needs to cover. So getting any kind of job is better than no job to also help with expenses you will encounter.

    • This reply was modified 5 days, 4 hours ago by Karebear1813.
    in reply to: Did I do a terrible thing? #1097626
    Karebear1813
    Participant

    The police ARE the best people to contact during a mental health crisis if the person is sucidual/homicidal and having erratic behaviors because they are the only ones that have the LEGAL ABILTIY to FORCIAIBLLY make someone go the hospital against their will. Social workers nor mental health crisis works have this ability nor the training and/or resources to do so. And quite frankly, I know alot of these people, they do not want this responsibility. It is to much of a risk and a liability.

    Law enforcements every where deal with these situations on a daily bases if not multiple times a day.

    This whole anticop things just pisses me off. Perhaps walk a mile in their shoes, volunteer, and hell, maybe even join the force and turn what you think is a negative into a positive since you seem to know it all.

    Also it’s not just a moral issue that she cannot keep the dog, it is a legal issue. She has no rights to this persons property that she took even if assuming the dog will have a better life.

    in reply to: Did I do a terrible thing? #1097599
    Karebear1813
    Participant

    You should have let the cops manage the situation. They have training and access to resources to help this women that you dont have.

    If she was having a mental health crisis then she should could have been taken to a hospital whether by agreeing or being forced.

    And if she is an addict then the worst thing you can do for addict is supply them with cash and buying them a hotel rooms.

    You didnt know what was going on with her and I know you were trying to do what you felt was right but what if this women, whether due to her mental issues or due to using drugs, had seriously hurt someone…had seriously hurt you?

    And about the dog…you should unblock her and allow her the opportunity to get her dog back and/or ask if you can give the dog to her family. You don’t know her history with her dog. I would recommend meeting in a safe place like a police station and/or at the dogs vet to surrender the pup back.

    in reply to: Family/financial trouble – I don’t know what to do #1097103
    Karebear1813
    Participant

    how old are you?

    in reply to: Losing my friend #1097043
    Karebear1813
    Participant

    LW, you sound possessive.

    “So, how do I get rid of his “friend” (preferably legally) and how do I get my friend to see what he’s up to?” TF is this suppose to mean?

    If you make plans with your friend and he “ditches” you after agreeing to those plans because of these other friends then your issue with with that friend and not his friends.

    You sound delusional and paranoid. This guy is a friend and nothing more. And he doesn’t owe anything to you other than an apology when he dips out to hang out with others.

    Maybe that’s the sign he is trying to give you that he’s trying to scale back on this friendship.

    • This reply was modified 1 month, 4 weeks ago by Karebear1813.
    in reply to: How to save face at this point? #1096833
    Karebear1813
    Participant

    Your main focus should be getting a divorce. That is were your energy need to lie.

    Your friends had no business contacting his new girlfriend but I get it. They wanted to warn her about the POS he is. Clearly her friends don’t like this guy or else they wouldn’t be getting involved but still, you need to fins closure in this chapter of your life and move on.

    It’s been 3 yrs of an on and off again relationship that you say is toxic and abusive.

    Get the divorce done as quickly as possible and move on.

    At the end of the day this is alot of petty drama.

    in reply to: My mums making my pregnancy 10x worse. #1096650
    Karebear1813
    Participant

    Kudos to your husband for having your back and supporting you.

    I think you should talk with your doctor to assist you with finding an appropriate counselor on this situation. It’s time to find peace within this toxic/abusive relationship between your parents and you.

    Your parents were disrespectful to you in your home and your father told you to “shut up” and intimated you in your own home but now wants to play the victim. You had every right to ask them to leave.

    You are allowing them to stress yourself out by pondering why they are not responding to you and acknowledging you on social media. Its obvious, they are angry, maybe rightfully so or its an abusive tactic making you feel guilty.

    in reply to: Grand Daughter is stealing money from me. #1096549
    Karebear1813
    Participant

    Susan your responses are “Strange” and no they do not make any sense.

    in reply to: Grand Daughter is stealing money from me. #1096500
    Karebear1813
    Participant

    LW is just trying to paint the picture that she views her granddaughter as neglectful/irresponsible which is likely why she is assuming she is the perpetrator. And regardless of who may be in need of financial help does not give them the right to steal from them.

    Whomever it was not only burglarized her but robbed her. And thank you @Prognostigator for pointing it out – likely committed Elder Abuse. Depending on the state she is in but Elder Abuse can be a felony charge even though the monies stolen is a misdemeanor.

    Elder Abuse is very common among relatives esp their children and grandchildren and usually goes under the radar out of fear that they will lose their only support system even if its a sh*t support system. Lets not chastise this LW but encourage alternative means to assist in protecting her.

    in reply to: Grand Daughter is stealing money from me. #1096464
    Karebear1813
    Participant

    I’ll start with this: Susan how do you know who took it? What evidence do you have to support your claim or are you assuming?

    If you know someone is coming into your RV, why aren’t you making attempts to lock it or find a safe place to store your cash. If you are able to navigate a smartphone and apps then instead of carrying cash, use cashapps like Venmo or Paypal. That way you can transfer money to whomever for whatever reasons.

    you can buy small safes online or in a store. I’d suggest doing that.

    I would suggest not to accuse someone of stealing unless you know without a doubt who it is.

    • This reply was modified 2 months, 2 weeks ago by Karebear1813.
    in reply to: It’s time for her to meet his parents #1096129
    Karebear1813
    Participant

    If you are stalking your husbands whereabouts because you don’t trust him, it’s time to move on.

    If your husband puts more effort into a friendship than he does his marriage, it’s time to move on.

    If your husband avoids telling you the truth about his whereabouts/plans because it will cause a fight, it’s time to move on.

    At this point Tina you need to see a psychologist, not a therapist. And get a divorce lawyer.

    What move confirmation do you need. I am convinced you could walk in on them having full blown sex and STILL questions whether you should leave or not.

    • This reply was modified 2 months, 3 weeks ago by Karebear1813.
    in reply to: Family over Love #1095496
    Karebear1813
    Participant

    It will surely confuse his children even more if “mommy” and “daddy” move in together, playing house together, and him still seeing you. What dysfunction that is.

    I cant help but think how odd it is that he hasn’t been with their “mommy” in 2yrs but yet, as young as they are, they want “mommy” and “daddy” to be together. It makes me think the children have overheard and/or seen things to believe they will get back together.

    Regardless LW do you want a man to fully commit to a long term relationship with you that looks like moving in together and officially blending your families and taking on the dynamics of a family TOGETHER – which leads to marriage? If so then either he step up in that role or you move on and go find what you want.

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