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@Copa, thanks, that also helps explain why Robert felt like the women already felt a connection, just the way Bumble is set up, it’s like they already expressed some interest. Though of course that’s just based on the profile and doesn’t represent a real connection.
He did say I think a few times that he’s open to / has messaged women closer to his own age. I don’t know if he’s stopped pursuing women under 35 though. IMO, a 47-year-old guy should absolutely not message anyone who has the upper limit of her age range set at 40 or below. She’s probably already stretched the upper limit of who she’s open to. If she’s saying 40, she probably prefers 35. Of her upper limit is 45, fine, shoot your shot, but women definitely don’t want to hear from guys above their stated age range on dating sites.
I’ll just say it again, women who are open to dating a 47-y/o guy are going to be *in their 40s.* Maybe a few in their late 30s or early 50s. Most likely 42-49.
Glad it wasn’t him!
Last weekend there were dead baby birds outside the front door, from a nest that a couple of doves have next to A/C on the third floor. There’s a guy who’s really really into these doves, plus the old guy whose window it is and he told me he likes them. My husband saw the babies on the ground when he went out at 6am to take the dog to pee, and I was like, we have to get rid of them. He picked them up with paper towels or something and took them to the trash. I hope no one else saw.
This is true, but some things are going to be red flags for pretty much any sane woman, like being sketchy and evasive about your job, having no online presence, and not being reachable through messaging. And refusing to acknowledge or understand why women need to protect themselves.
None of that is acceptable these days, and that’s why one of your few in-person meetings was with a nut job who suggested riding with the Uber Eats guy as a first date.
We just got lobster rolls for takeout and it did put us in a better mood to have that classic Memorial Day food. Even though last year at this time we were on a sunset lobster roll boat cruise on cape cod 🙁 With a bar. And with friends.
- This reply was modified 1 day, 23 hours ago by Kate.
But when we call her, there ain’t shit to talk about. She used to have visitors almost every day and there were things happening to chitchat about. My mom used to give her a foot rub with lotion (she’s got a lot of stiffness and can only walk assisted), and I would do her nails. So she’s missing all that interaction.
She can’t, unfortunately. She does have an iPad my dad gave her, but I don’t think her hands are mobile enough to use it without help. The nurses help her check email and stuff. We just talk on the phone.
No, it wasn’t a joke! He did a shady-ass thing by going behind his friend’s back and confessing feelings for his girlfriend. That’s not cool. He got caught and lied about it so as not to blow up the friendship.
I don’t know what you want to do about it, but that’s what happened. He’s shady and a liar.
I drove over to Boston to drop the stuff off for my aunt. You can leave things on a little table right inside. I called her first and she was SO excited to have new things, like it was Christmas. She told me like 3x to make sure to let the person at the front desk know I’m leaving something for her. I feel really bad for her because she’s definitely the most with-it person in there mentally, and there is just nothing to do. They did turn the TV channels back on so she can watch movies, and I guess a nurse let her do something she wasn’t supposed to do, which was so illicit she won’t even tell me what it was, but otherwise it’s so freaking boring and the nurses are working their asses off and don’t have time to chat as much. I don’t know how much she knows about what’s happened with the virus in nursing homes, I haven’t told her any of that. She’s not afraid, just bored.
“ Are you saying that these conversations need to get into emotions and feelings, and not be limited to surface things, such as interests and things we like?”
I know this question wasn’t for me, but no, a first conversation should not get deep / into feelings. It is truly just chitchat, to establish a rapport. As to your comment that it seems to have to happen immediately or not at all, that’s not what we’re saying. I’ll say it again: most people know very quickly that they DON’T want to talk to someone again. If they have that feeling, that’s when they’re going to ghost you or politely say they didn’t feel a connection. But it can take a little while to know if you really hit it off with someone and there’s chemistry. Unless a woman feels a definite “no,” she’ll probably be open to talking / seeing you again.
Yeah, to clarify, the reason I wouldn’t want to hang out with kids or anyone who may not completely follow guidance, is that it could put older people I come into contact with at more risk. Copa, you’re younger than I am and not really encountering seniors, right, so you’re probably fine.
My brother, who’s in his late 40s, extremely overweight, has breathing problems, delivers packages to businesses for a job (so he is high risk even in himself) is dying to go visit my parents (age 70) on cape cod this weekend and they’re going to let him, though they say they’ll make him stay outside. Where’s he gonna go to the bathroom though?? The thing about him is he DOES NOT WASH. He comes in contact with multiple members of the public and has the worst hygiene of anyone I know. I can’t.
PS, I wouldn’t feel comfortable being around kids right now. Or really anyone, but my mental health has been damaged.