Dear Wendy
Dear Wendy

Weekend Open Thread

Happy weekend! I hope wherever you are in the world, the weather is better than it currently is here in New York. This has been the gloomiest start to the month of May that I can ever remember. But, alas, life goes on, and this weekend, in addition to hosting a shabbat dinner at our home last night with a couple families we were randomly matched with by our synagogue — side note: it was surprisingly fun hosting a dinner party for strangers! — we also have two kid birthday parties, and on Sunday night Drew and I are going out to celebrate 13 years since our blind date that started it all (I was in my 20s! Drew still had black hair!).

I took the day off yesterday in part to get ready for our dinner, but mostly to go shopping. I have three events I need dresses for: a fundraising gala Drew and I are going to in a couple weeks; my close friend‘s memorial in a month; and my BFF’s big gay wedding on summer solstice. For weeks I’ve been ordering dresses and trying them on at home and then sending them back because they don’t work. I finally decided this was an inefficient way of doing things and I just needed to carve some time to shop, which is what I did yesterday morning. Unfortunately, the results were the same (nothing looked good on me) but with the added demoralization of having this confirmed by salespeople, as well as eating up a few of the only child-free hours in my week, so blah to all that. I went home and ordered a couple more dresses from online to try. They’ll probably look dumb on me.

Anyway, since I didn’t get around to doing Friday Links yesterday, here’s a single link I thought you might enjoy:

The Best Advice We’ve Ever Received (and Are Willing to Pass On)

Enjoy the rest of your weekend!

18 comments… add one
  • ktfran May 4, 2019, 12:55 pm

    Good luck on your dress quest. And thank you for posting that article. Don’t pickle things…. this is now my favorite piece of advice.

    I’m not sure if you’re into slip dresses, but Cuyana makes a great one. Very chic and simple.

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  • Kate May 4, 2019, 7:51 pm

    Yeah right, I’m sure everything looks dumb on you. Come on.

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    Bittergaymark May 4, 2019, 8:35 pm

    If you like silly fun Lifetime movies… watch PYSCHO STRIPPER tomorrow (SUNDAY) nite on Lifetime. I was the art director for it. (WOO HOO!) Which meant I was busy handing male strippers fake money and various other deadly weapons as well as designing the looks of rooms and what not.

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  • Miss MJ May 4, 2019, 8:43 pm

    A-line dresses paired with actual heels. Halters, sleeveless, square neck, sweetheart, high neck, plunge, whatever. Just above the knee to tea length works, depending on your preference. This combo seems to be nearly universally flattering, regardless of age or shape. The cut is generally forgiving and the heels — which are key — keep it from being frumpy. Wear a blazer or cardigan with it for more tailored events. Halter or sleeveless (not so much strapless) for dressier or more formal ones.

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  • Wehaf May 5, 2019, 4:00 pm

    What cuts of dress make you feel comfortable and look good on you? What colors or patterns? Have you looked at the dresses at Unique Vintage?

    P.S. “Alas” indicates grief or sadness; I hope you aren’t actually sad that “life goes on”!

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      Dear Wendy May 6, 2019, 8:06 am

      Ha, no – just sad that it’s been so rainy and gloomy. (Alas, I guess it was a poor word choice.). This morning is lovely though!

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  • Beep Beep May 6, 2019, 7:08 am

    Try out Rent the Runway! I thin NYC actually has a brick and mortar store where you can try on the dresses. Their website is amazing though, lots of photos and user reviews that help make dress selection a dream. I use them for all my special occasions now

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      Dear Wendy May 6, 2019, 8:04 am

      I’ve thought about that but don’t like that I still have to pay to rent the dress even if it doesn’t fit and I don’t end up wearing it (and I really have a hard time finding dresses that fit, so that’s a big risk, even with lots of photos and reviews). If there’s an actual brick and mortar store where one can try on dresses though, that could work. I’ll have to look and see!

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      • Beep Beep May 6, 2019, 10:57 am

        In my experience, RTR has fabulous customer service. On the rare occasion a rental dress doesn’t work, they either ship me another dress straight away or credit my account. I think, if you live in New York, they have their flagship store in the city. Something to keep in mind for the future!

        NYC Flagship
        30 W. 15th Street
        New York, NY 10011


  • Buzzlebee May 6, 2019, 9:08 am

    I’m a big fan of dresses from Boden. I’ve got giant boobs (38H) and I can find dresses that have enough coverage that I’m not indecent but not so much coverage that it’s matronly. Unfortunately in the US they are online only so I do end up ordering something like $800 worth of clothing at a time and then returning at least half of it. The one good thing is that they seem to almost always have a sale going on.

    Plus almost all their dresses have pockets!

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  • Anonymous May 8, 2019, 10:26 am

    I have a suggestion regarding dresses…I order my dresses from eshakti.com. the dresses are made to your exact measurements, can be customized with regard to sleeve, neckline, etc, and almost all the dresses have lovely deep pockets.

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