Dear Wendy
Dear Wendy

Weekend Open Thread

Hi, everyone! I was on vacation this past week and was busier in the lead-up – packing, grocery shopping, picking up the rental car, getting our place clean and ready for the cat-sitter than I anticipated – and I didn’t have time to get a post up before I left. Even though I brought my laptop with me, I don’t think I opened it the whole time we were away. It was nice to unplug for a few days – our airbnb didn’t even have TV, the wifi was inconsistent at best, and as soon as I parked the car in the driveway, I didn’t move it again until we headed back home. (The kids survived somehow though; I think the pool and expansive lawn helped!) It was our first time away from Brooklyn in six months, with the exception of one overnight in New Jersey back in June, and our first real family vacation in nearly a year. We had a trip to Mexico planned for April, but obviously that didn’t happen. I was so sad coming home yesterday at the idea of having nothing to look forward to now but endless days at home and, soon, homeschooling again, that I booked us a weekend getaway a little ways upstate for Jackson’s birthday in October. It will be too chilly for swimming, but I found a place with a hot tub that overlooks the Hudson River and is only a few blocks from some hiking trails.

What’s new with you? Do you have any end-of-summer getaways planned or anything you’re looking forward to? I’ve been so depressed and anxious about everything, and getting a change of scenery for a few days helped to take the edge off a bit. I recommend it if you’re able to. I don’t have any links this week, but I’ll be back on Monday to start a new week of regular posting. Enjoy the rest of the weekend, if that’s something you still do (have weekends, I mean)!

22 comments… add one
  • ktfran August 15, 2020, 11:47 am

    The husband and I desperately need to get away. Unfortunately, we’re surrounded by states and counties outside of our own who aren’t taking this seriously. Like, maybe we can rent a house for a long weekend in MI. There’s no way in hell we’re going to WI, IN, IA or anywhere else in IL. I guess maybe some places in OH might be ok.

    Anyway, I envy you. I enjoyed your insta posts.

    We’re considering options. There’s a good chance we’ll shelter in place somewhere warm for the month of February. I might go crazy if I’m stuck here for the entirety of winter. I loathe a it here in February under normal circumstances.

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    • Ange August 15, 2020, 7:12 pm

      I was meant to be heading to Hawaii pretty soon and then to Brisbane and the Gold Coast in October/November, none of which is happening now. Its my 40th birthday soon so I’ve resigned myself to thinking of something else to do now I can’t visit with my friends. It’s so disappointing.

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      • Ange August 15, 2020, 7:12 pm

        I must have accidentally hit reply instead of new comment, whoops!

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      • Ele4phant August 15, 2020, 7:19 pm

        Lol no worries.

        I was supposed to go to Hawaii in mid March so I feel your pain.

        Also – during the last economic recession ten years ago I ended up traveling through Australia for three months after I got laid off from my shitty job.

        Makes me sad that people who are getting laid now can’t consider doing the “whelp, guess I’ll travel for a bit, see some cool stuff, and see if the job market turns around by time I get back” option.

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      • Ange August 15, 2020, 7:28 pm

        the worst part is the travel company is holding my money hostage. They have two and a half grand USD of mine and won’t let me know what is going on with it all. I was going to sign up for the re-scheduled 2022 tournament but they’ve just behaved appallingly since covid broke out.

        At the very least when we can we might still do Hawaii, or maybe Europe I don’t know. It feels like a pipe dream right now.

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      • Ele4phant August 15, 2020, 7:45 pm

        Oh the way our country is going we’ll be done with all this by next summer.

        There will be a horrific number of deaths and people grappling with life long disabilities as a result but hey – herd immunity one way or another – imma right? /s.

        As long as you survive you should be able to travel soonish.

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    • Fyodor August 16, 2020, 8:24 am

      If you rent a house somewhere in the boonies for a few weeks, does it really matter if people are taking it seriously? Bring your food and supplies and just enjoy the outdoors and the space.

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      • ktfran August 16, 2020, 10:48 am

        Well, we have quarantine rules on most of those states listed. Not all of IL use those rules, but Chicago. I think a few states have changed, I’d have to check. IN might be ok.

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    • Copa August 17, 2020, 10:42 am

      Highly recommend the western side of Michigan, @ktfran! You should be able to plan it in a way where you can generally avoid people/crowds (especially true if you’re willing to wait until September, when the peak season is over). Michigan summers are absolutely the best. The daylight goes on for what feels like forever and the sunsets over Lake Michigan are beauuutiful. We were going to do a few days in the Saugatuck area this weekend, but then with moving right around the corner, decided to just do one night in the South Haven area.

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      • ktfran August 17, 2020, 7:21 pm

        Two girlfriends and I have a week picked!! And yeah, we’ll go to western MI.

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  • anonymousse August 16, 2020, 11:41 am

    We did have a mini getaway booked, but the host canceled a few days before. It’s probably for the best, but it was very disappointing. My husband is super burnt out, cyber school starts in two weeks and ugh. This year sucks.

    Buy some stamps and help save the USPS. You can text USPS to 50409 (resistbot) and tell your elected officials how you feel about our constitutional right to the post office being dismantled so Trunp can further suppress voters.

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  • Kate August 16, 2020, 11:59 am

    My parents said fuck it and moved to Cape Cod permanently. The town only has 5k residents or maybe less. They gave up their apartment in Boston and sold their original Cape condo and bought a new detached condo that’s like a house. Very very small town, and they’ve got a fenced patio and garden and my mom’s growing vegetables.

    They just online shop and cook Hello Fresh or get takeout. They might have another Boomer couple over now and then to eat on the patio and wear masks. They go to the beach or state park at odd times and float in rings tied together.

    They keep sending pics of new shit they got, like a fire table for outside and an outdoor dining set. I’m pretty jealous.

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    • Fyodor August 16, 2020, 1:18 pm

      If I could figure out a seamless way to rent my house out I would totally move to the boonies and just bunker down there for the next six or nine months.

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      • Kate August 16, 2020, 1:44 pm

        It’s very appealing.

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      • Dear Wendy August 17, 2020, 7:26 am

        Same. It was wondering to be in the boonies, not see another soul outside our little group, have plenty of space (indoor and out), and lots of peace of quiet (other than the crickets and croaking bullfrogs every evening). I didn’t want to come back.

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    • ktfran August 16, 2020, 5:09 pm

      That sounds amazing.

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  • Kate August 16, 2020, 7:22 pm

    Shit, I just took a Psychology Today test, turns out I’m 100% that bitch with GAD. I never thought I had anxiety, just low-level depression, suicidal ideation, and sleep problems. Must be the pandemic. If I have it, I’m gonna guess a lot of you do too.

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    • Dear Wendy August 17, 2020, 7:36 am

      I don’t need a test. I’m certain I have low-level depression and low-level anxiety. I always had low-level anxiety, but the depression is new since the pandemic. I expect the anxiety will ramp back up once (online) school starts in three weeks, and I’m worried what winter will be like when the few things that have given a little bit of quality to my/my family’s life will be much harder to sustain and my usual seasonal affective disorder kicks in when the days get shorter. And I can’t even bear to think about what might happen if Trump is re-elected. UGHHHHH

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      • Kate August 17, 2020, 7:49 am

        Same. It said my depression wasn’t really even an issue, but the anxiety was. And yeah, I’m really dreading what happens when it gets cold and all that and if Donald steals the election successfully.

        I’m MA, I think the college kids are going to be getting that regular testing every few days, and the bars and clubs aren’t open. And (this sucks so bad for parents but is safer) public school kids won’t go back in person. We’re doing ok here it seems. But as soon as it’s cold it will be like lockdown again, without the hope we felt last time.

        I will absolutely vote in person anyway. It’s worth dying for.

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    • Fyodor August 17, 2020, 8:59 am

      My brain was a savory stew of anxieties and neuroses before all this started and it’s definitely got worse. I honestly don’t know how I’m going to bear another nine months or a year of this. There’s some interesting stuff happening on the treatment and testing front which might make a difference but absent a working health infrastructure to scale it up and distribute it, I don’t know how much of a difference it’ll make.

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  • Moneypenny August 16, 2020, 9:01 pm

    My weekend was pretty productive. The weather here has be SO hot, in the 80’s in SF, and over 100 degrees 20 minutes south, where my bf and I were yesterday. We went to a new nursery to check out some plants for the backyard, and the trip was a success! The couple of nurseries we’ve been hitting have all been busy – I guess Covid is a great reason to work on your yard! We sweated our way through the selections and came away with some great options. Last night there was a huge thunderstorm (also very unusual), and today has been gross humid (78% bleh), but we decided to plant the plants and do a bunch of clearing of weeds and it looks so much better! Fingers crossed that the plants all take. It was worth all the sweating, haha. 😛

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  • Miss MJ August 17, 2020, 5:38 pm

    Glad you enjoyed some time away, Wendy!

    We’ve been covered up with work the last few weeks, but I think we’re planning a “staycation” by the beach the week of Labor Day. (We’ve basically just retreated to our condo in FL for Covid, since we can’t go to the office in Nola anyway because it’s sporadically shut down due to a positive case.) It’s actually been nice this week now that people have left since school started, remotely or otherwise. I still won’t go out to eat or do anything besides the sit by pool or go to the beach (socially distanced), but that little bit of outside time really, really helps.

    And I need the break, my stress and anxiety are absolutely insane right now. I was having daily panic attacks and my blood pressure skyrocketed a few weeks ago, causing me to suffer massive headaches every day. I went to the doctor, and she actually decided to up my dose of anti-anxiety meds instead of putting me on blood pressure medicine because I don’t really meet the factors for needing high blood pressure meds. (Meaning that my blood pressure would naturally go down to normal levels at night, but my stress was causing it to spike ridiculously every afternoon.) It’s helped, but getting this dumpster fire of a year and presidency over with will be what needs to happen to fix it.

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