Dear Wendy
Dear Wendy

Weekend Open Thread


This is me on the beach in Chicago last Saturday during my solo getaway (wearing my favorite pair of sunglasses). It was awesome!! I had the best time. And I highly recommend that all parents of young children try to get away without their kids — with or without their partners — from time to time. I realized last year when we took an 8-month-old Jackson to Dominican Republican on our first family “vacation” that traveling with a young child in tow is not actually a vacation, especially if you’re a stay-at-home-parent whose full-time job is taking care of your child. At least if you work outside the home, you’re theoretically getting a vacation from your day job, even if you’re doing a different kind of work while you’re away. But stay-at-home-parents who travel with their kids aren’t on vacation — they’re just doing their day (and night and weekend) job in a different place.

So ever since our family “vacation” to DR last summer, we have not taken another true family getaway except to visit relatives. Instead, I’ve been to Chicago on my own several times and Drew and I went away for a weekend in early May (and plan to take another this fall, hopefully). And I have to say, that’s the way to do it! These trips give me the breather I desperately need and let me re-connect with people who mean so much to me (without the pressure of chasing around a toddler and tending to his every single need). Last weekend I got to see a bunch of friends, old and new (including Ms. Addie Pray) — some of whom I’ve known since I was 17. I went for a run in one of my favorite Chicago parks, took a private yoga class at the beach, drank margaritas in the sand, swam in the lake (before the booze), sang and danced my ass off at karaoke, celebrated two friends’ birthdays, a housewarming party, AND was in town during a dear friend’s labor (didn’t get a chance to visit mom and baby in the hospital, but felt great being near the action and celebrating with mutual friends). It did my soul good. Really good.

In a couple weeks, the three of us will be traveling to Missouri to see my parents and other relatives and friends and that will be good, too. Different than traveling on my own, but good just the same, and I’m really looking forward to it. In the mean time, we are sweating buckets in NYC during this crazy heat wave (heat index is 110 today!!), and doing whatever we can to find pockets of relief. This morning, I took Jackson to the library and we read 17 different books about trucks and then rode the escalator up and down and up and down until we were both sick of it. Then we had a play date with a friend and her little boy and then we collapsed once we walked the half-mile home (half a mile in 110 degree heat may as well be ten miles). I won a watermelon lemonade at a local cafe, and after I got jackson fed and down for his nap, I MAY have dropped a shot of vodka in that lemonade but I will neither confirm nor deny such things. It’s Friday, y’all. It’s hot. And it was a long morning.

How are you keepin’ cool on this hot-ass week/end?

73 comments… add one
  • katie July 19, 2013, 4:05 pm

    oh i so hear you about the heat. i was in PA for the last week and it was insane! and i work in a kitchen, with a huge oven. it was not fun. and your just sticky and sweaty all the time!

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  • GatorGirl July 19, 2013, 4:16 pm

    Wendy your trip sounds lovely!! Does Drew ever get to take solo trips?

    I’m leaving Sunday for a week long business trip (horray in the 2 months we’ve been married we’ve spent less than a month together!). So tomorrow there is cleaning/packing and then a bar crawl. Sunday we’re heading to Jacksonville to hit up the beach (or a brewery…) before my flight. So we’re having a fairly low key but fun weekend.

    I’m pretty excited to head to PA, last time I was up all my time was wedding dominated, so I’m getting in some family/friend time this trip. Good news for all you North Easterners, I’m bringing some cooler weather from FL with me! (And I’m going to a demolition derby while up north, yay rednecks!)

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    • theattack July 19, 2013, 5:29 pm

      Demolition derbies are so cool! I’m jealous. Have fun! 🙂

      But WAIT! A trip to PA doesn’t mean a break from DW does it? This is disconcerting.

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      • GatorGirl July 19, 2013, 5:41 pm

        Yeah, it means a bit of a DW break. Boo.

  • lets_be_honest July 19, 2013, 4:17 pm

    Wow! How the hell did you walk that far in this heat?! You probably lost 10 pounds in sweat! 🙂

    I had FINALLY talked myself into taking a trip alone, albeit a very short one, to visit my siblings who were all in the same city last weekend. But we had a family friend emergency at home, so never went. I’m sure there will be many more chances. I’m thinking early August, hopefully.

    I have a fun weekend planned! Coronas on the porch tonight, Lil’s first sewing class in the morning, then a friend’s 2 y/o’s birthday party and Sunday I’m going to a baseball game, mostly to tailgate…

    Stay cool Condleberries!

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    • theattack July 19, 2013, 5:27 pm

      I hope all is well with your family friend emergency. Have a fun weekend!

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  • ktfran July 19, 2013, 4:22 pm

    Tomorrow I’m golfing. With the crush. It’s rare that I intentionally put myself in a situation where I’ll look like an idiot. It usually just happens. Should be an interesting day.

    I’m praying for it to rain tonight like it’s supposed to so it cools off a bit for tomorrow.

    Also, I bought new shorts for tomorrow. And top. If I can’t play golf well, or at all, I at least need to look cute doing it.

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  • othy July 19, 2013, 4:34 pm

    I love traveling myself. I’ve done it for years. Mr. Othy and I have a very different idea of what makes a trip fun. I love seeing people I haven’t seen for a while (both family and friends), going out to see super touristy areas, and shopping. Mr. Othy would rather find a quiet corner (in a library, on a beach, whatever) and just relax. We travel together quiet often, but I do a solo trip at least once a year.

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  • honeybeenicki July 19, 2013, 4:39 pm

    My step-son’s 13th birthday party is this weekend and thankfully it is inside in an air conditioned community center! And then I’m going to see a good friend’s band on Saturday night and plan to do a whole bunch of nothin’ on Sunday. I worked a bunch of overtime on a mind-numbing project all week in addition to prepping for this party, so I need some chill time.

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  • Addie Pray July 19, 2013, 4:58 pm

    Hi hi hi hi – I got to meet Wendy *and* one of her friends who is now my friend too muwahahahaha.

    So here’s what I am doing this weekend in this order:

    Friday after work: going on an OKC date I am not looking forward to at all; meeting friends for a drink – but just ONE drink – because I have had WAY TOO MUCH to drink this week, which you would know if you’ve been reading my drunk forum posts.

    Saturday: buy a road bike (I want to start riding for real; my (amazing) hybrid with this huge ass seat and even huger-asser basket just doesn’t go as fast as I need it to to keep up with men cyclists) – this is all apart of my plan to start riding in races so I can meet men *and* get my exercise in

    Saturday night: family friends and their 3 kids are staying with me and i offered to stay in and babysit while the couple hits the town.

    Sunday: watching a friend run a half-marathon (which oops i might miss) and then going out for brunch and mimosas after (that part I will NOT miss); then I need to see a movie so I can write my review on — what movie is out that’ good??

    And then BAM it’s already MONDAY already? This blows chunks! I hate it how the weekend goes so freaking fast!

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    • Addie Pray July 19, 2013, 5:03 pm

      I can’t tell you how excited I am for Sat. night. There are going to be kids aged 12, 8, and 6 at my house, and the 6 year old is a girl with hair I get to braid! And we are going to watch awesome movies like Home Alone and we are going to eat stuff like (vegan) mac and cheese!

      I. Cannot. Wait.!!!!

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      • Addie Pray July 19, 2013, 5:40 pm

        Oh and I forgot – Saturday I’m doing a 3 hour Bikram workshop with the USA bikram champ – this weekend is going to rock.

      • Addie Pray July 20, 2013, 6:53 pm

        So I took the workshop and realized I suck at Bikram, completely, at it all. I feel defeated. Those yogis aren’t messing around.

  • EscapeHatches July 19, 2013, 5:29 pm

    So I live in the Phoenix area and did a little experiment the other day. I’ll preface this by saying I’m VERY used to the heat, it doesn’t bother me, etc.

    I weighed myself in stages (naked, clothed, clothed and shod, clothed/shod/holding my ridiculous water bottle) and then went for a 2 mile run/walkity/jog. I went jogging at about 5pm when it was 112 out, and 35% humidity.

    I lost nearly 3 lbs in 30 minutes.

    Hydrate, y’all.

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    • Lindsay July 19, 2013, 6:48 pm

      I missed this Phoenix part and got to the end and was like, “WHAT! Why was it 112??” So, I had to re-read. 🙂 That’s so crazy, though. I’ve been trying to make sure I stay hydrated while inside because my apartment is so hot. Excessive heat is kind of scary because it can be so dangerous.

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    • Trixy Minx July 20, 2013, 2:10 pm

      I do not miss Phoenix!

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    • Megan_A_Mess July 20, 2013, 9:55 pm

      I miss AZ … Hug a palm tree for me, please! I’m hoping to make a trip down there next summer to visit some friends, and I know I’m in for a world of pain, but I love the heat!

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  • thewriteway July 19, 2013, 5:36 pm

    It is on my bucket list to take a solo cruise at some point in my life! Maybe next year…Norwegian has a couple of their newer ships with studio cabins meant for solo travelers, so no single supplement! Yay!

    I’m spending the weekend trying to stay cool because it doesn’t always feel like the AC works in my attic bedroom! We’re supposed to get storms in PA tomorrow, and I have never been more excited. Beyond that, I’m going to do some grad school research and try to work on my attitude. Hoping some positivity and trying not to stress so much clears up my ongoing eye problem a little more. We put one of our dogs to sleep on Wednesday, and I had to fight not crying because it tends to make my eye look red and in pretty rough shape. Still not winning, but I’m determined!

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    • Lindsay July 19, 2013, 5:50 pm

      I was just thinking about your eye and hoping that it was getting better! (That’s really less creepy than it sounds, I promise.)

      I’m sorry to hear about your dog, though. 🙁

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      • thewriteway July 19, 2013, 6:14 pm

        Thank you…it was expected (she had incurable cancer), but I still keep hoping to see her around the house. Not to mention my well-meaning friends continue to send me sad poems about pet loss. I know they are trying to help, but they (the poems, not my friends) make me cry more. 🙁

        I think from far away you can’t tell I have an eye problem. I was on webcam today for a work conference call, and I had a glare on my camera, so I don’t think anyone would’ve been able to tell something was wrong. But when I look in the mirror, my one pupil is still larger than the other. It’s so frustrating, and I try not be self conscious of it, but part of me just really wants it to go away because I’m trying to go into a field where good appearances are important (not modeling or anything, but still), and I don’t want some hiring manager to notice my eye and be put off!

      • Fabelle July 20, 2013, 9:37 am

        I’m so sorry about your dog too 🙁 That’s really tough, even if expected.

      • KKZ July 21, 2013, 4:51 pm

        Sorry about your dog as well. I’ve had dogs all my life and it never gets easier to say goodbye, even when it is expected.

  • theattack July 19, 2013, 5:37 pm

    We’re going to a pool party with P’s law school friends in Nashville. It would be fun except I’m not in bikini shape, and all of these people are athletic AND have boob jobs and perfect bodies, and they’re all yuppie vegetarians who only eat certain things and only wear certain things. I’m more like a slob who wants to drink Mike’s Hard Lemonade slushies all day fully clothed from Target’s clearance rack and eat chips.

    What kind of food can I bring to a yuppie vegetarian pool party? Slimfast bars or something?

    Your trip to Chicago sounds fun, Wendy! I’m glad you got to get out and enjoy yourself, and I hope Drew gets to do that sometime too.

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    • rachel July 19, 2013, 5:39 pm

      I say bring beer (or your Mike’s slushies) and if no one else wants to partake, well there’s just more for you!

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      • theattack July 19, 2013, 6:01 pm

        I would definitely bring beer, but they’re strictly anti-alcohol too because it poisons your body or some shit.

      • sarita_f July 19, 2013, 11:13 pm

        Oh for god’s sake. SPIKE THE PUNCH!!!!!!!

    • GatorGirl July 19, 2013, 5:46 pm

      Is it actually vegetarian? Will there be air conditioned food storage?

      I would say chicken salad in cucumber cups, hummus and veggies, a white wine sangria, um fresh salsa and chips. Let me check my Pinterest.

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      • GatorGirl July 19, 2013, 5:49 pm

      • theattack July 19, 2013, 6:12 pm

        holy crap that looks good!!!!!

      • GatorGirl July 19, 2013, 7:14 pm

        Yeah. I might have to make a pitcher just for myself 🙂 what kind of car are y’all getting? (get the suit regardless, it’s only 25!)

      • GatorGirl July 19, 2013, 5:53 pm


        Did you look at that target swimsuit?

      • theattack July 19, 2013, 6:06 pm

        I want to get that swimsuit so bad, but this weekend I’m trying to talk P into letting me buy a more expensive car than we originally agreed on, so I’m going to hold off for the moment. If he says no then I’ll definitely buy the suit. Actually if he says yes I might go buy it too. haha

      • call-me-hobo July 19, 2013, 7:35 pm

        theattack, are you buying Nissan? I can get you employee pricing if you are.

      • theattack July 21, 2013, 1:52 pm

        Thanks, hobo! That’s really nice of you. We’re probably getting a Subaru. My dad actually works at a factory that provides parts for Nissan, and he drives up to the Smyrna plant all the time. I wonder if your boyfriend and my dad know each other.

      • call-me-hobo July 22, 2013, 8:04 am

        He actually probably knows my dad. He’s an engineer at the plant; he’s been there 30 years. It’s weird that the bf got on with NIssan, too (even if it is the corporate office)

      • theattack July 22, 2013, 9:08 am

        They have to know each other then. My dad is an engineer by title (ie: doesn’t have an engineering degree, but was so good the company promoted him to that title, if that makes sense), but he does maintenance and quality control for his plant. He’s at Nissan and some of the other plants a lot trying to help with troubleshooting or something like that, so surely they’re around each other. Weird! We have to talk about this.

      • theattack July 19, 2013, 6:04 pm

        It is vegetarian. I really like the chicken salad idea though for everyone else. I could bring like chicken salad finger sandwiches for the meat eaters and then something else for the vegetarians. Thanks for the idea!

      • GatorGirl July 19, 2013, 6:06 pm

        Cucumber and cream cheese finger sandwiches are supposed to be good. And if you freeze the bread it cuts straighter/neater.

        And a pool party with out booze sounds like a real buzz kill.

      • theattack July 19, 2013, 6:10 pm

        It really will be. Also these people are really nice. Like REALLY nice. They’re so nice that I feel uncomfortable. It’s like they’re machines, and they’ve never thought a mean thought in their lives. I like to gossip and say “fuck” and jokingly pretend to punch P when he does something not even mean at all. How am I supposed to do this without booze?

      • sarita_f July 19, 2013, 11:17 pm

        DON’T do it without booze. Bring a bottle of Simply Lemonade for yourself, replace 1/3 with vodka. Or go get a slurpee/slushee before and bring it with you – spiked with vodka. Also, go to brunch w/ your hubby before – do they have bottomless mimosas where you live?

        Clearly I am going through a phase where I feel the need to drink for pretty much all social gatherings. Not a problem I’m projecting on you, swear! 😉

      • GatorGirl July 19, 2013, 6:06 pm

    • othy July 19, 2013, 9:17 pm

      You could always make a caprese salad. Tomatoes+basil+mozzarella=delicious!

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  • scattol July 19, 2013, 4:51 pm

    Wendy is “Almost Famous”

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  • Lindsay July 19, 2013, 5:52 pm

    I’m getting Ethiopian food (my favorite!) tomorrow night, and possibly going to an outlet mall if I stop being lazy. Other things that involve air conditioning. The problem is that I really need to organize my shit in my room and potentially pack some boxes, and my 97-degree room is the last place I want to be.

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  • Sue Jones July 19, 2013, 6:06 pm

    Swimming in the Bay today, flying home to the mountains tomorrow….

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  • TaraMonster July 19, 2013, 5:11 pm

    It is SO HOT in NYC. WHhhhhhhyyy??? Ugh.

    Perfect day for a Mets game, no? Well that’s what I’m doing anyway because it’s my boyfriend’s birthday and he loves baseball and I got him these tickets as a surprise so goddamnit we’re going!

    If I never return to DW it’s because I’ve melted at Citi Field. Go Mets!

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  • Amy July 19, 2013, 6:13 pm

    Hiking in the mountains – it’s been cool here – 60s and 70s. But hopefully warm weather tomorrow. And… my guy just got back! Excited to hang out with him all weekend! Woo Hoo!

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  • AliceInDairyland July 19, 2013, 6:14 pm

    Today is Benjamin’s birthday so we are going to eat with his parents then go out somewhere for a few drinks. Tomorrow I am going to can a whole bunch of stuff (cherry chutney and sour cherry preserves and hopefully dilly beans, wasabi beans, and mustard beans). Then Sunday is the farmer’s market in the morning and then in the afternoon…

    WE ARE GOING ON VACATION! We are going wayyyyy up north in lovely WI to his family’s cabin that is on a lake with no public access. And we don’t come back until Tuesday night/Wednesday morning. We are going to fish and read and drink and sleep and sex and sleep and sleep and sleep. It’s going to be lovely.

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    • GatorGirl July 19, 2013, 6:47 pm

      I totally snooped on your blog, which is adorably cute. Out of curiosity how much does your CSA run? You’re share sizes look HUGE.

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    • Fabelle July 20, 2013, 9:40 am

      I snooped on your blog, too. I love it (& I sent it to my boyfriend, because he fantasizes about growing things & canning & living on a farm with animals. Part of this is zombie apocalypse fear-based, which I see is something you also mention. haha)

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  • Lemongrass July 19, 2013, 8:10 pm

    Mr. Grass is reno-ing our bathroom finally, it’s been a ‘next on his list’ for about three years now. So he’ll be doing that while I run around trying to keep a teething baby happy and well rested while making blueberry-lime and regular blueberry jam. I’ve cooked enough food for tonight and tomorrow so I should be able to do it all. I ran 5 K (actually 5.18 but who’s counting) for the first time today, went grocery shopping in the city and so dinner is lemon-basil quinoa, Greek salad and shake n bake. Because I just thought ‘fuck it’ by the time it came to the chicken.

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  • No Pantalones Today July 19, 2013, 9:05 pm

    Hooray for weekends! Mr. Pantalones and I are staying in town this weekend (right outside Philly). We just went on a date to a local Mexican, and now we are catching up on Fringe. Tomorrow, brunch with a bestie. Sunday, practicing rowing positions on the rowing machine at the gym. So, low key and awesome. Happy weekend, everyone 🙂

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    • No Pantalones Today July 19, 2013, 9:06 pm

      *local Mexican place

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  • paperheart July 20, 2013, 12:23 am

    This weekend we have to try to rid Ella of her separation anxiety. (So fun!! – sarcasm.) In two weeks, we have to go to my mom’s college graduation (which I’m very proud of! – no sarcasm), and we usually take Ella everywhere with us. But we obviously can’t take her to that, so we have to start working on leaving her at home. I think we’re just going to leave her at small increments (5, 10, 15 minutes) and slowly work up to bigger periods of time. I’m hoping we can accomplish leaving her for a few hours in in two weeks. Which pretty much sounds impossible. Right now she cries pretty much constantly if we step outside for a minute or if I go take a shower, and so far it hasn’t been to much of a hassle to just take her with us when we go somewhere. But I know we have to stop spoiling her so much eventually, or this will get alot worse, so that starts this weekend. I’m afraid it’s going to break my heart.

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    • paperheart July 20, 2013, 12:26 am

      Also, Wendy, that picture is beautiful, and so is your new avatar picture! I wanted to say something about it the other day, but I wasn’t sure where to put it. 🙂

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      • Wendy July 20, 2013, 7:18 am


  • MaterialsGirl July 20, 2013, 7:09 pm

    Hi guys! I’m in NYC for the first time this weekend and its hot as balls. Yesterday, we went to MOMA and then had brazilian food for dinner and I got some crack pie for dessert. Today, I ran in Central Park 🙂 it was super cool, although HOT as BALLS. Tried out this crazy burger place called KOrzo, and got some Big Gay Ice cream. Teehee. Too the Staten Island ferry out and back.. Going to Brooklyn tonight for bowling and dinner. Well, Williamsburg or some place. It’s really fun but (sorry Wendy), I would still rather live in Chicago

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    • Wendy July 20, 2013, 7:17 pm

      Welcome! Come back when it’s not hot as balls!

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      • MaterialsGirl July 20, 2013, 7:26 pm

        I will! It’s bad but sorta bearable?
        I’ll be in Brooklyn soon at Brooklyn star for dinner and then Brooklyn bowl!

        It is really super interesting learning about the different subway systems and the city planning. I’m a nerd. Like.. Space is such a premium : no alleys and garbage on the streets!

      • d2 July 20, 2013, 10:57 pm

        Yay for nerds!

  • Addie Pray July 20, 2013, 11:45 pm

    Wait, no alleys?

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    • Wendy July 21, 2013, 6:53 am

      No alleys, but get this: the subway system/ public transportation is actually very convenient (unlike Chicago where I have been stranded countless times because its practically impossible to get around without a car or bike and good fucking luck trying to find a cab on a Saturday night). You can get on a subway and get to almost any place you need to go in the city (minus red hook…). But, yeah, garbage on the streets in nasty.

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      • mandalee July 21, 2013, 1:57 pm

        I have to agree with Wendy- New York has by far the most convenient public transportation I’ve ever used. I miss living in NY just for the sheer convenience of getting places. Boston’s public transit is well, shitty and poorly planned, but it’s better than nothing.

      • MaterialsGirl July 22, 2013, 12:49 pm

        yeah the subway was super convenient and a crazy maze. As long as you’re not in the middle of queens or something there’s plenty of crosstown/uptown/everywhichway subs to take.

        I took the EL this morning and was disappointed by the A/C although I appreciated that our stations are a lot cooler than NYC’s

        Chicago really needs a ‘square’ line.

        NYC was super fun and nice, but i’m glad to be back in Chicago. It’s cleaner, greener and smells better. BUT I can’t wait to visit New York again. Lots more stuff to see and do and eat.

        I think my skin is much happier back in Chicago, too.

  • KKZ July 21, 2013, 5:04 pm

    It’s been an interesting weekend that didn’t go quite as planned, but when do things ever? Friday I confronted my husband with a Very Serious Talk (which I’d hoped to push to Sunday, but the Universe wasn’t going to wait), Saturday we were emotionally hung over from said Serious Talk but got together with my folks and brother for a lovely Thai dinner and a concert – Ian Anderson, frontman of Jethro Tull – the tickets for which were my Father’s Day gift to my dad. He tried to take me to a Tull concert years and years ago but I didn’t know who they were and I passed, then like 2 years later I discovered their music and got really into it and have kicked myself for missing the chance to see them live. When I saw Ian Anderson was coming to Cinci AND playing one of my dad’s favorite albums, Thick as a Brick, I knew it would be a great gift. And it was, the show was awesome, concert was outdoors but thankfully the big storms that swept this area last night passed right by us and it wasn’t so ungodly hot that we couldn’t enjoy being out. It was my second Prog Rock concert in a month at that venue, I saw Rush with some friends a few weeks ago – specTACular show. (Thanks to my rock-n-blues father, my musical tastes are far older than I am.) And my mom, who hates rock concerts and especially dislikes prog rock, behaved and didn’t ruin it for the rest of us this time. 🙂 Today we got lunch with some friends, one of which we haven’t seen in about a year, and successfully clipped our dog’s nails with the help of copious amounts of lunchmeat. Tomorrow, we start counseling. So yeah, a bizarre up-and-down kind of weekend.

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    • theattack July 22, 2013, 12:33 am

      Ian Anderson, holy shit am I jealous!!!! I kind of wanted to walk down the aisle to Sanctuary, but thought it might be insensitive to include slavery as a topic in our ceremony. haha

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  • Sobriquet July 21, 2013, 10:47 pm

    Soo, I got engaged this weekend! It’s still sinking in. We’re thinking a destination wedding and I will probably be writing in the forums soon because weddings are *not* my expertise! It was also my birthday a few days ago and we rented a condo on the lake with a private hot tub with my best friend and her boyfriend! It rained most of the day, so the hot tub was perfect. We also did some wine tasting at a couple of nearby vineyards the next day. So yeah, I’d say it’s been a good week!

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    • LadyinPurpleNotRed July 22, 2013, 12:40 am


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    • Classic July 22, 2013, 12:55 am


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    • d2 July 22, 2013, 7:45 am

      Yay Sobriquet!

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    • call-me-hobo July 22, 2013, 8:05 am

      WAAAHHH!!! Congrats, sobriquet!

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    • lets_be_honest July 22, 2013, 12:55 pm

      Great news sob!

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    • MaterialsGirl July 22, 2013, 12:58 pm


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