Dear Wendy
Dear Wendy

Weekend Open Thread and Links

I guess it’s Friday today? That’s what my calendar says anyway! In an alternate universe, my family is in Isla Mujeres, Mexico right now, enjoying the beach (pictured above), on our first international vacation in nearly eight years. In this universe, we’re on day 36 of quarantine, enjoying whatever small pleasures we can find/create (house-made margaritas, Schitt’s Creek, and dance parties on the deck in the sun for me; endless episodes of My Little Pony for a certain someone else in the family), and feeling very appreciative of all the essential workers making it possible for us to stay the eff home knowing our basic needs – tequila, sour gummies, Honey Bunches of Oats, and medication — will be met. It has been an intense and often nerve-wracking five weeks, but also full of special moments that make the harder ones a little more bearable. I hope you have also experienced enough good to carry you through the challenges of this moment as well.

A quick housekeeping note: Ninety percent of my income is generated by ad revenue on this site and I’m always exploring different ways to balance my need to make money with keeping things user friendly for you, the readers. To that end, I’ve removed the annoying video pop-ups on the mobile site. I appreciate that not a single one of you made a complaint about them, but I didn’t like them and I imagine you didn’t either and that wasn’t worth the little boost in income it generated. Also, as you might imagine, across the board, websites that depend on ad revenue have seen an enormous drop in that stream of income, including me. As retailers see a record drop in revenue themselves, they are pulling back on ad spending, with some exceptions. Unfortunately, some of those exceptions are not businesses I want advertising on my site, and I’ve noticed some unsavory ads appearing here. I’ve been in contact with my ad network to disable those ads and they are working on it. If you see an ad on this site that you believe is in conflict with my values, I’d be grateful if you emailed me (at wendy(AT)dearwendy.com) and let me know. It would be especially helpful if you could include a screen grab with your message. Thanks so much!

Now, here are a few links from around the web that might interest you:

“A small-town police department in Maryland has reminded residents to wear pants while checking the mail, yet another sign that many people working during stay-at-home orders are dressing casually, if they’re getting dressed at all.” — ‘This is your final warning’

33 Moments Where Friends, Family, And Total Strangers Had Each Other’s Backs In This Pandemic

‘A Schedule Has Been Really Crucial for My Mental Health.’ Have you been keeping to a daily schedule? What does it look like?

I don’t have to do work-related Zoom meetings, and my zoom calls with friends are with, well, friends, so I’m not experiencing this phenomenon, but I can certainly believe it’s true. Can anyone confirm? It’s Not Just You: In Online Meetings, Many Women Can’t Get a Word In

The Best (and Mostly Free) Virtual Games to Play with Friends

Have any of you tried to cut your own hair yet? This woman did: I Gave Myself A Bob Haircut At Home — & It Changed Everything

Related: Now Is the Time to Get to Know Your Natural Hair

Drew, my one and only, has been using quarantine to get back to his drawing roots. You can follow his progress on Instagram, where he posts a new drawing – and corresponding narrative – every day.

10 comments… add one
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    Guy Friday April 17, 2020, 2:08 pm

    Did you really mean to out Drew as a brony like that? 🙂

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    MaterialsGirl April 17, 2020, 2:08 pm

    That beach shot looks heavenly.

    In the 33 pictures link, the 4th picture of the window washer? that’s the building next to me. For you chicagoans, the white building is NEMA and the brown building is the corner of Michigan and Roosevelt

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  • ktfran April 17, 2020, 3:10 pm

    Re: Zoom meetings. I’ve noticed some people definitely dominate the conversation, but it’s not based on male vs female. It’s not even based on manager vs employee. Maybe it’s because there’s a big mix in all my meetings?

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  • Kate April 17, 2020, 3:32 pm

    I have not cut my own hair, but I cut my husband’s hair with clippers and it came out fine. I did a high and tight fade. For never having touched anyone’s hair with a blade before, I was kind of happy with the result.

    I have not noticed that about men dominating Zoom meetings, but I’m having issues with men in senior mgmt being a pain in the ass and constantly changing direction like la la la let’s do this. No, cut all that stuff, let’s pivot. How about let’s just know wtf we should be doing?

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  • Helen April 17, 2020, 7:06 pm

    GuyFriday, dying
    I’m so sorry you missed your trip to that beautiful island my phone won’t correctly spell for me Wendy! My favorite vacation was there. Buckets of Sol beer & shots of tequila delivered to my beach chair….oh wait I’m sober again. The food was amazing too. We had a whole red snapper and soup sitting in chairs on the beach. The eggs Benedict platter at another restaurant were so good I ordered them twice (I like to try new things so rarely get the same thing twice) They were playing Adele and I can’t hear that album without tasting that amazing dish. Oh and the lobster mac & cheese!! You have to go when travel is a thing again! We got a golf cart and exploded the entire island. Beautiful gem of a tiny sliver of land. I loved every second I was there. I’ll see what resort we stayed at, had our own rooftop hot tub. Heaven. Something for you to look forward to! I hope everyone’s feeling better

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      Dear Wendy April 18, 2020, 6:04 am

      That all sounds amazing. We’ll get there eventually!

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    Bittergaymark April 17, 2020, 7:38 pm

    How strange — Wendy! I was supposed to set sail on a cruise to the Caribbean tomorrow. (We were to rendezvous in Fort Lauderdale tonight literally as I type.) My first international travel in nearly 8 years…

    Sigh… It’s all very depressing.

    You MUST go to Mujeres some other time, I daytripped there once and LOVED it…

    Hmmmm. On all my Zooms, women seem to dominate. (Not in a bad way.) But then these are all social chats. Maybe its different in tedious work meetings to nowhere…

    This week has been a long, grim Reality Check. A stark reminder that my life/career went into a real tailspin post 9/11. This promises to be way worse. Honestly? I am not exactly sure I will have the energy to pick up the pieces yet again. I’m long out of reinventions.

    Sigh… I hate that when I get depressed, there is no escape. Booze only magnifies the bleakness.

    Stay safe, everybody.

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  • Leon April 17, 2020, 11:09 pm

    I love this site, so I’ll make sure to support it via ads.

    It has been a really long week. Everyday is beautiful, as it is spring here. Some beautiful sunshine and then some rain here and there.

    But it gets tiresome and repetitive. It is weird because I’m investing my time in myself and in my art production, so that thing is cool. But nothing is happening outside, everyday feels like a Sunday.

    Currently alone, as the girl I’m renting a room is working from her parent’s home. Somehow I’ve managed to get used to the loneliness, I don’t resent it. But also I’m thinking about how I haven’t felt human contact (I mean, touch) in weeks. So it is strange to being OK with it too.

    Today I’ve worked very hard, so I think I’ll have Saturday off tomorrow.

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  • Buzzlebee April 18, 2020, 11:29 am

    On the theme of quarantine hair, I’ve been dabbling with the idea of doing a semi permanent hair dye while home. I work for a government office with no interface with the public so while I generally want to stay in the professional realm it really doesn’t have to be (one supervisor said I could shave my head again if I wanted too). I am working from home almost full time (I have to go in once a week to trade out work as it’s all paper based but it doesn’t have to be in business hours) but who knows when we will go back to work.

    I saw someone do an ombre with a fun color and I also thought that could be fun and then if it’s terrible I could just get the bottom part cut off. All that said, anyone have a good experience with a fun hair dye or have recommendations?

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