Happy Labor Day Weekend, everyone! This is always such a bittersweet time of the year. Summer’s coming to an end, winter is looming in the not-so-distant future, many of us are going back to school — or work after taking some vacation time. But, then, I don’t know about you, but there’s nothing like fall’s crisper weather, homemade butternut squash soup, the changing leaves along the landscape, and pumpkin-flavored everything (ale!). And on a personal note, this fall I have a little something extra to look forward to, so my excitement is really amped up.
Anyway, for this weekend’s open thread, feel free to share what your plans this Labor Day weekend, what you’re most looking forward to this fall or what the highlight of your summer was. And if you’ve got a relationship dilemma you want some advice on, we’re all ears.
One more thing: after I posted about my 50% discount on ads this week, a reader bought one to promote her new “Shakedown” (see the ad on the right sidebar). Give her a little DW love and go check it out. And if you’d like to take advantage of my 50% ad discount, it’s not too late! Sign up here and use code DearWendy50.
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amber September 2, 2011, 5:23 pm
I’m getting ready to hop in the car for a 6 hour drive with my husband and two dogs to visit our families for the weekend. It’s the dogs first long car ride and the first time to meet the family. We haven’t been home for 3 months so I’m very ready to see everyone! 🙂
I am looking forward to being able to enjoy my porch without sweating this fall and like Wendy said the great abundance of pumpkin flavored goodness in all the stores!
Addie Pray September 2, 2011, 5:42 pm
This weekend I’m moving! Next door. Same floor, one unit over. [It’s bigger, with room for a table – a real one, with 4 chairs. I’m moving up in this world!] I took the afternoon off so I could start shuttling stuff down the hall to its new spot. This weekend I’ll be moving more crap, organizing, cleaning, throwing shit away, etc…. in a doo rag while I blast music. Well, I’m kind of in a dar williams mood. So “blast” to the extent you can blast dar. Happy labor day, everyone!
Britannia September 2, 2011, 5:52 pm
Congratulations!
Lydia September 5, 2011, 8:31 am
Ooh, I moved this weekend too! Hope everything went well for you.
Addie Pray September 5, 2011, 4:53 pm
The move is done! Hope your move went well too, Lydia. I’m now laying on my couch with the windows open (this fall weather is to die for!) and watching boats brave choppy lake michigan. I would watch tv but there’s nothing but shit on. 500 chanels and nada. It’s weird to think I pay all this money for cable, and for what? Basically, so I can DVR Keeping Up with the Kardashians. Not worth it.
JK September 2, 2011, 6:25 pm
I’m definitely on your grandparents’ side here.. not just because of the accident, but a “family business” should be just that. especially if they’ve already stated they don’t want your bf involved. It would be interesting to know wht tone your bf uses when he says he “wants you to involve him in all aspects of the new business”. it could just be me but I felt that maybe he was pressuring you a little bit?
I feel you should be able to tell him that your grandparents really want “family only” involved in the business without the relationship being damaged. Does he know they don’t like him much? maybe you could say something like your gps only wanting family, but that if you feel you ned his help with something you’ll ask him?
JK September 2, 2011, 6:25 pm
Ugh, obviously a reply to Britannia. Blame it on the lack of sleep!
Britannia September 2, 2011, 6:29 pm
It definitely doesn’t feel like he’s pressing it, it feels more like he really does want to provide me with advice that my grandparents may not have… but to my grandparents, it would look really bad and maybe I’m biased.
He definitely knows that they don’t like him, and it hurts him. He knows it’s his fault to have started on such a bad note, but my grandparents are also VERY difficult to please — they don’t think anyone is good enough for me, just like most fathers think no man is good enough for their daughter until they’re proven wrong. He’s trying really hard, though, and so are they because they know that I love him.
JK September 2, 2011, 6:42 pm
I can only imagine how hard it must be for your grandparents after how your relationship started to accept your boyfriend.
I’m glad that everyone involved is trying hard, which is all the more reason to not involve him in the business, at least for now. maybe in the future your grandparents become less adamant about not having him involved, all the better. But I think for all involved (and with all possible outcomes in mind) the best thing would be just that.
Skyblossom September 3, 2011, 2:53 pm
I think you can tell him that if the two of you respect your grandparent’s wishes they are more apt to respect both of you in return. At this point in time it is their money and so their choice and you will need to respect that. They earned the money and saved the money and it is theirs to do with as they wish. When your boyfriend has done the same then he can make the rules about his money and use it as he wishes.
Also, if you do have questions at this point in time you can talk to your grandparents for advice and your grandparents probably know more about running a business at this point in time than your bf does because they have many more years of experience. Also, if you don’t depend on your boyfriend you will learn to run this business yourself and be able to depend on yourself in the future and that will mean a lot to your grandparents. If you bf got involved in the day-to-day of the business and at some point in the future you wanted to breakup with him you might feel that you couldn’t because you wouldn’t be able to run the business on your own. I think it’s best for all involved if you learn to do this, asking your grandparents for advice as needed, and then if you end up getting married to your bf you can include him at that time. He would have the rest of his life to learn how your business works but you would also be able to run it on your own.
Britannia September 4, 2011, 11:02 pm
It’s very very true that if he respects their boundaries now, it’ll endear him sooner… Thank you! I used that as part of my argument when we talked last night, and he received it well.
Someone else mentioned getting an outside consultant, and I think I will tell my grandfather that we need to get an impartial third party to get everything translated into English and also an outside consultant, the on-call kind not the salaried kind, to help me as needed once my grandparents are gone.
The independence thing is an important part, too. I really want to be able to handle things on my own. Being reminded of that helped me center my attentions better – this is about my grandparents giving me a platform to develop upon and I need to be able to do that on my own, because what if a breakup or death happens? Thank you so much for your insight 🙂
JK September 2, 2011, 6:27 pm
At times like these I’m glad I live in the southern hemisphere, I’m so over winter!!! Where i live Spring starts officially on the 21st of September, but the weather has already gotten a lot nicer!
Britannia September 2, 2011, 5:35 pm
I’m going to respond to each thing separately….
We don’t have special plans this weekend, but my grandparents are finally back in town after being on a 3-month-long vacation and I’m very happy to see them again, so my time will mostly be spent there. Also, I will be working a little bit, and I’m going to be facepalming a lot with people coming in to my store, asking for Labor Day Weekend discounts, and then getting mad when I tell them that my store doesn’t do discounts, ever. Why walk into a luxury store and get angry with a sales associate that there aren’t discounts? Ugh.
TrixyMinx September 3, 2011, 11:31 pm
I’m guessing everyone that thumbed you down has never worked retail.
neuroticbeagle September 4, 2011, 3:40 am
Agreed! Sales associates do not make the rules, but they need to eat (well, I certainly do) and can’t afford to lose their jobs.
Sigh.
People be crazy.
Britannia September 4, 2011, 11:09 pm
Seriously, retail is so much harder than people think.
Today, I had a man come in who was adamant about buying some clothes… but NOTHING, and I repeat NOTHING, was “quite right”.
He literally tried on one of everything in the ENTIRE store. Well over 150 things. After getting mad that we didn’t have any labor day discounts, demanding to see my manager and then looking chastised when he tried to cop attitude with her and got told that he was asking for me to lose my job if I was to give him 10% off… and he ended up buying two measly shirts (after taking up 1/4 of my shift and leaving me with a huge pile of unwanted stuff). And then he told me as he left, “Too bad you couldn’t do better for me.” I wanted to headdesk right then and there!
btw, it took me over an hour of solid attention to refold and relocate everything that I brought to him.
I would kill to have a desk job… where I never again had to deal with people like him… but I really do love working retail, it’s a masochist kind of thing. (I am training to be a visual merchandiser.)
Britannia September 2, 2011, 5:36 pm
This fall, I’m most looking forward to all the television shows coming back with new seasons, especially Dexter! Also, all of the Yelp Elite Squad events start happening in the fall since my city is a ghost town during the summer, so I’m really excited to get in on that!
Britannia September 2, 2011, 5:50 pm
Also, I do have a relationship dilemma that I need help with… I’m going to put things in very basic ways because I don’t want to give too many details. Okay, here goes:
I am the sole grandchild of my grandparents, and my mother is estranged, so I will be inheriting everything from them. Just recently, my grandfather decided to set up a business in the town they call home (it’s a vacation town in Mexico), which is a very special place to us, so that I will never have to worry about paying the bills for that home and it will be kept in the family for the next generations. If the business is very successful, it could become a legitimate enough source of income that I would be able to retire very early.
I currently have a boyfriend who I live with who is a really wonderful guy, but I’m not 100% sure if I want to marry him (I’m only 22 years old). This is definitely a long term relationship that I am very happy to be in, but I’m just not sure if he’s the right guy for me to marry. My grandparents have reservations about him (people who know me from past postings may remember that my boyfriend was driving the truck that caused the accident that destroyed my spinal column, almost killing me, when we first started dating). They’ve forgiven him for the most part, but it’s still in the back of their minds. He treats me very, VERY well, and that really helps their opinion of him. However, my grandparents are very old school and they don’t think that ANY boyfriend of mine should be privilege to the inner workings of our family until he asks me to marry him. My grandparents specifically said to me that they do not want me letting my boyfriend get involved with the business.
Well, my boyfriend told me that he wanted me to involve him in all aspects of the new business. He would provide valuable insight because he owns his own business, but I do not want to disrespect my grandparents’ wishes and boundaries. I tried to explain this to him, and he became offended because he says that if we do end up getting married (an idea I am hesitant but still ambivalent about) it will be very hard for him to understand everything going on with the business, and that it would just be easier if he was along for the ride from the get-go – and also, he would be able to provide insight on things that my grandparents may overlook. If my grandparents found out I was including him in the development of the business, they would see him as a gold digger and me as someone who they cannot trust to be discretionary and trustworthy.
I really don’t know what to do… do I include him? Do I not? If I don’t, how can I explain it to him in a way that doesn’t damage our relationship? Any and all advice would be GREATLY appreciated…
ABC September 2, 2011, 6:19 pm
From what you said, and please bear in mind I am not familiar with prior posts about this accident so I am disregardig that as a factor, it sounds like your grandparents have entrusted you with something they hope will help provide for your future. That is an incredibly generous thing to do, as I’m sure you know. They are setting you up for early retired! Don’t underestimate how amazing that is to do for someone. That said, my opinion is I would not even consider going against their wishes. I don’t know your boyfriend determine whether he is or is not a gold digger, however, I am sure he can give you advice as any boyfriend would be happy to even if they weren’t working with you. He will be able to learn how it functions should you remain together for the long haul. Let it be your grandparent’s decision when to allow him the privilege to be welcomed into their business, and it sounds like right now it is just that: their business.
lets_be_honest September 2, 2011, 6:22 pm
From what you said, and please bear in mind I am not familiar with prior posts about this accident so I am disregardig that as a factor, it sounds like your grandparents have entrusted you with something they hope will help provide for your future. That is an incredibly generous thing to do, as I’m sure you know. They are setting you up for early retired! Don’t underestimate how amazing that is to do for someone. That said, my opinion is I would not even consider going against their wishes. I don’t know your boyfriend determine whether he is or is not a gold digger, however, I am sure he can give you advice as any boyfriend would be happy to even if they weren’t working with you. He will be able to learn how it functions should you remain together for the long haul. Let it be your grandparent’s decision when to allow him the privilege to be welcomed into their business, and it sounds like right now it is just that: their business. EDIT-oops, signed in under ABC.
lets_be_honest September 2, 2011, 6:24 pm
Misspellings abound due to iPhone typing.
Britannia September 2, 2011, 6:38 pm
I am so lucky and so grateful to have my grandparents, they have been so good to me and they are the only family I have left… This new business is a really, really big thing to me and I’m very nervous because I’m fretting about so many aspects of it… what if I mess up a crucial decision? What if I file in paperwork wrong and the government decides to deny the permits? What if the business partners (my grandpa is going in 50/50 with someone he’s known for a long time) decide to screw me over because I don’t understand legalese when it’s in Spanish after my grandpa passes away? Having my boyfriend to talk to really helps calm my nerves… but I don’t want to talk to him about stuff for fear of angering my grandparents because I’m talking shop with him.
I’ve had problems in the past with boyfriends taking advantage of my resources… When I first started dating, I was very trusting and I didn’t know how to tell when someone was “using” me, so I have unfortunately spent a lot of money on a lot of people who didn’t deserve my friendship. My grandparents staged an intervention after a boy had emotionally manipulated me into paying his rent and I really began to understand that not everyone has the best of intentions and that I should be less giving when it comes to materialistic things. So my grandparents and I are both very sensitive to the idea of a gold digger coming into our family, now.
I think I will be using that line, “He will be able to learn it later on” to paraphrase you. I still don’t know what to decide in regard to getting his advice on things, but it seems that if I decide to stick to my grandparents’ wishes, I will not be able to ask him for help with anything at all. Maybe he will be able to emotionally support me without getting involved in the business? I’d appreciate any suggestions on how to discuss that with him…
kali September 3, 2011, 5:12 pm
Does your boyfriend speak/read Spanish?
I agree with others here that you cannot go against your grandparents’ wishes and if your bf can learn the biz now, he can learn it later. If he speaks/reads Spanish, he should have slightly more access so he can help you with the documents but otherwise, wait. Until you two are married. And even then, why can’t he continue to run his own businesses? That would be ideal because you wouldn’t have all your eggs in one basket.
I don’t see why you can’t ask him for help without letting him into the business. If he has experience, just ask him: “Hey, Hon, this came up with the company and I was wondering if you’d ever dealt with anything like this situation?”
There are also many business groups like SCORE (www.score.org) that offer email mentoring, free small business advice, and more. You don’t have to rely on your bf if you don’t want to. This is a tremendous opportunity and I don’t think your grandparents would set you up if they didn’t have faith in your ability to make it a success.
You can do this! And congrats on having such wonderful grandparents.
Britannia September 4, 2011, 10:44 pm
He doesn’t speak Spanish but he is a very critical thinker, honestly I think he has a genius IQ, and he is able to think in the abstract, play chess with possibilities, and that is really helpful. He’s almost always right when it comes to predictions, which is both useful and infuriating at times (lol)
I will definitely be checking out SCORE, thank you for that suggestion!
beans629 September 3, 2011, 5:10 pm
So I’m confused. *seriously perplexed look*
You have MORE than 1 login to Dear Wendy?? Hmm, why is that?
I kinda thought you and Jena were the same person but I thought…’who over the age of 12 does that?’ so I shrugged it off as my overactive imagination. But now, well I’m not so sure. I’m not trying to stir anything up but I feel like you’re kinda shady.
Wow. Just Wow.
Emsz September 4, 2011, 3:32 pm
There’s no such thing as an account to Dear Wendy, so lets_be_honest can have easily typed the wrong name in the Name field.
lets_be_honest September 5, 2011, 1:44 am
Its definitely not your overactive imagination. I’m deviantly giving out fake advice under a false name hoping to trick people on the Internet into taking it. Then I’ll be able to take over the world. 😉 You got me!
Bethany September 2, 2011, 7:13 pm
You should ABSOLUTELY NOT go against your grandparent’s wishes. If something happened to them and you were the one in charge, then yes, do what you wish, but while they are alive, this business is THEIRS and you need to respect their wishes. Blood is thicker than water.
Britannia September 4, 2011, 10:46 pm
I have decided that I agree with that. The problem with keeping him away from the business is that we live together and any time I’m going over paperwork or something like that, or stressing about something, he’s right there and wants to help or talk to me because studying and understanding the whole “running a business” thing is about as difficult as learning physics for the first time.
katie September 2, 2011, 8:23 pm
i have to say that I agree with your grandparents- a boyfriend that you aren’t even that sure about marrying shouldn’t really be in a decision making/ influencing position in a family matter of a family he doesn’t below to- and a family you have no intentions as of right now to make him a part of. i think that just sounds like a recipe for disaster, personally.
my boyfriend is also inheritating everything from his grandparents, and he has told me about it a little, but i never ask prying questions (how much is in the accounts/what kind of jewels does she have/ect). he and I fully plan on marrying each other, and i still feel like i am on the outside, and i will stay on the outside until we are married. even then ill still feel weird if i have to make decisions- its not my family!
just explain to him that this is not an issue he has to deal with. maybe in the future, but right now he doesn’t have to worry about it. if his “professional” expertice is something you need, hire a consultant.
Britannia September 4, 2011, 10:47 pm
The consultant idea is a good one. It’s also good to hear from someone that it IS possible to be okay with being on the outside of “the circle” of a family before marriage. Thank you!
cookiesandcream September 3, 2011, 8:02 am
I think it’s a little strange how your boyfriend gets offended when you say that you don’t want to disrespect your grandparent’s wishes and boundaries. The way I see it I think you’d prefer if your boyfriend wasn’t involved with the business because you want to respect your grandparents and you aren’t sure of your future together. If your boyfriend continues to push his way into your grandparents’ business, then to me it’s a clear sign that he wants to cash in regardless of whether you two get married. Even if he isn’t a gold digger, he needs to be respecting your boundaries as well as your family’s.
Britannia September 4, 2011, 10:51 pm
The way I don’t think he’s a gold digger is because it isn’t like he’s trying to meet the business partners or get his name put on anything… it seems like he really does just want to support me. However, I absolutely do have to put my family first, you’re right. It’s hard for him to handle that because we live together and he always puts me before his family (his family is nice enough, but not very supportive of each other). So, he considers his highest devotion to be to me, but this new business is making it obvious that I have some stronger devotions to my family than than to him right now. I’m pretty sure that it feels unfair to him on an emotional level in regard to the balance of our relationship…
Maracuya September 3, 2011, 1:30 pm
I think you should just firmly tell him that you can’t go against your grandparents wishes. Maybe acknowledge that his experience would be helpful, but I’m sure they’re also experienced as well (or know someone who can) and could provide you with help. I would just say it’s out of your hands.
beans629 September 3, 2011, 5:03 pm
>>it will be very hard for him to understand everything going on with the business, and that it would just be easier if he was along for the ride from the get-go
I don’t understand this part. Why does he feel that he NEEDS to be in on the ground floor of the business to understand the inner workings. That kinda sounds shady to me (and I don’t even know him). I just keep thinking… what if he had met you years after the business was established? Would that prevent him from getting involved in the business? Seriously, what if you get married and still don’t want him involved in the business?
I would just say that it’s your family business and he’s not technically family. If he can’t respect that then there’s probably a really good reason why you’re not sure you want to marry him.
Also, even if you do eventually marry him. GET a PRE_NUP (I can not over state that). Unfortunately, divorce does happen and you wouldn’t want him to walk off with half of your inheritance or the inheritance meant for your kids.
Just sayin’…from personal experience no matter how much you love someone don’t EVER mix love and money. It’s a recipe for disaster.
kali September 3, 2011, 5:13 pm
Yes, PRE-NUP!!
Britannia September 4, 2011, 10:56 pm
I talked to him about the bit about him potentially being able to catch up on the business once we were married, and that my family is really just too guarded to let him in, even just as an advisor. He said that he just wants to provide his input when it can help and that it hurts him that my family still pushes him away, even though he acknowledges that it’s their right to be hesitant about him. He says that he can’t just get over his feelings, though. I told him that if I was having a difficult time emotionally, I could talk to him about it, but that if it was strictly business I really just couldn’t and that if he insisted, it would put me between a rock and a hard place.
I said this up a few posts – he and I live together and are a very “together” couple, but I think he is more devoted to me than I am to him. He puts me as a way higher priority than his family, he rarely sees them and fights with them a lot… when the holidays come around, it’s my family’s plans that decide what we do, and I drop everything to do whatever my grandparents need and visit them often. I think that this situation is starting to make the imbalance more obvious to him, and it’s hurting him.
Britannia September 4, 2011, 10:57 pm
And yes, I fully believe in pre-nups for every marriage, no matter what. There are SO many reasons why people should get them, and very few solid arguments against them. No worries about my not getting one!
Quakergirl September 2, 2011, 7:06 pm
– Labor day plans: sleep, get a new couch, organize the apartment, and sleep. And get ready to start my new job next week!
– Summer highlights: going to the Newport Folk Festival. Such a good time and a very pretty town.
– Fall previews: Starting a new job, which I’m psyched about, and taking a short trip with Quakerboy to Paris, which I’m really psyched about. And of course, all of the wonderful, colors, flavors, clothes, and holidays!
cookiesandcream September 3, 2011, 8:36 am
Congrats on the new job! 🙂 I’m so jealous that you’re going to Paris; have fun while you’re there!
Quakergirl September 5, 2011, 12:13 pm
Thanks! The Paris trip is such a lucky coincidence. Quakerboy was asked to speak at a conference nearby and I just clocked in enough frequent flyer miles to be able to do it, so how could I not agree to tag along for the weekend?
Bethany September 2, 2011, 7:16 pm
My weekend plan is to try not to stress about my upcoming wedding that may or may not be cancelled due to the damage Hurricane Irene caused on the Outer Banks of North Carolina (where I am supposed to be getting married). Right now there is absolutely no re-entry for visitors set until at least 9/17 (but it could be longer than that) and I’m getting married on 9/25…
Rachel September 2, 2011, 8:54 pm
Yeah, I’ve heard there was a ton of damage down there. Good luck!
Chilosa161 September 2, 2011, 7:08 pm
Reading, reading, reading. The Meaning of the 21st Century by James Martin. Jonathan Culler’s analysis of Ferdinand de Saussure. The Paradox of Choice by Barry Schwartz.
I think I need to get back to school, STAT!
LennyBee September 2, 2011, 7:47 pm
The Paradox of Choice is a great read! One of my favourite marketing books.
Leigh September 2, 2011, 8:23 pm
I’m excited to just relax this weekend. I had a really rough week at work, so I’m planning on not doing much of anything and just taking a break. I’ve got some errands/chores I need to get done, but I’m never as productive on weekends as I hope to be, so I don’t really have high hopes for that all getting done. Oh well!
I agree with Wendy, I’m looking forward to pumpkin flavored everything this fall! I make an awesome pumpkin chocolate chip cookie, and I love the Starbucks pumpkin lattes! Yumm! I’m also looking forward to the weather cooling off a little. This has been my first summer living in the south, and it is HOT! Breaking a sweat during the walk from the car to the office is not much fun. I have so many cute jackets that I can’t wait to wear!
katie September 2, 2011, 8:29 pm
LAST weekend i took a long weekend and went to las vegas, which was very fun but very tiring. so this weekend will be relaxing, seeing friends I haven’t seen in a while (hopefully) and having some people over for dinner. also, if i have time for it, i will be working on the wedding cake that I am making in november- which is my big fall thing i am looking forward to. a big 10 day roadtrip to south carolina, stopping for a day in N carolina to see friends, then 4 days of rehersal dinner making/ wedding cake making, a wedding, then to the coast of south carolina to see another friend who is due to have a baby that very week! so good friends, a lovely wedding, good food, and maybe hopefully a new baby! its going to be a whirlwind trip.
mandalee September 2, 2011, 10:03 pm
My parents are coming to visit Boston for the first time since I moved here and it’s my the opening weekend of college football at my alma mater..so I’m very excited for my weekend plans!
The highlight of my summer was my wedding! Not only did I marry my absolute best friend, but all my college friends were in one place for the first time since we graduated over three years ago. I spent the whole night before the wedding sitting up all night talking to my friends and laughing like we used to in our freshmen year dorms. It was such an amazing night and I’ll never forget it! Then one of my friends officiated my wedding and did an amazing job. It was thunderstorming during the outside ceremony, and she just kept everyone in good spirits. I remember going to sleep the night of my wedding just so, so happy.
This fall, I’m going back to school to accumulate some credits in preschool education and child safety so I can open my own preschool/daycare in the next two years. After 3 miserable years in marketing/PR, I can not wait! I’m also getting braces, which I’m not too happy about! I’m 25 and already have a hard time getting into bars the way it is, so I can’t wait to try it out looking like I’m 18 lol
GatorGirl September 2, 2011, 11:39 pm
Best part of the summer-moving 900 miles to be with my boyfriend and end the 2 year and 10 month long distance phase of our relationship!! (and my boss has allowed me t work remotely which is amazing!)
Looking forward to this fall- Football!! Thanksgiving in SC with the BF’s family. Figuring out what fall is like in FL? Does that count?
Labor Day weekend- Going to the Florida Gator’s game tomorrow and helping host a 12 hour tailgate! GO GATOR’S! Then a fantasy football draft and cuddling at home with the BF.
There sure is a lot of football in my life…
Savannah September 3, 2011, 12:28 pm
GO GATORS!
MonMon September 3, 2011, 2:01 am
Ahhhh Wendy, I am more than happy to respond to this post, *especially* on this particular Labor Day weekend!
This year my September 5th birthday falls squarely on Labor Day, which is perfect for all my close friends to come celebrate with me (it’s my 25th, so I thought it shouldn’t go by uncelebrated!). We’re going to do lunch and then hit up the arcade for some air hockey 🙂
Then, on top of everything, my boyfriend of almost 3 years JUST PROPOSED to me during an after-dinner walk this evening. It was sweet and romantic until a large frog jumped on my foot while I was processing everything, and then everything just got funny.
Needless to say, I am feeling a little breathless right now 🙂 I am so excited to share this news with everyone, and believe it or not, Wendy and you DW readers are the first to find out!
katie September 3, 2011, 2:32 am
you have to have frogs in your wedding somewhere. you just gotta!!
that is so so cute- congrats!
MonMon September 3, 2011, 8:48 pm
Katie, I was thinking that actually, about the frogs….the funny thing is, I LOVE frogs, while my fiance *hates* them due to a traumatic experience from his childhood. hehe. One of my friends said that it must have been something symbolic having to do with not having to kiss anymore frogs now that I have my prince…. 🙂
And thank you! xo
blackbird September 4, 2011, 6:37 am
That is adorable. Congrats!
Addie Pray September 3, 2011, 6:26 am
Congratulations!
cookiesandcream September 3, 2011, 8:38 am
Congratulations! 🙂 That’s such an adorable engagement story!
SpaceySteph September 3, 2011, 12:43 pm
Yesterday was my 25th bday. I love that my birthday comes labor day weekend so I can celebrate with a day off!
Congrats on your engagement!
MonMon September 3, 2011, 8:48 pm
Thank you Steph! And Happy Birthday to you!
Aya September 3, 2011, 10:12 am
My husband and I are currently in a long distance marriage. (I’ll be able to move to be with him in December.) I’m visiting him for the first time this weekend since he moved three weeks ago. Needless to say we are both super excited. The plan is to eat a lot of yummy New Mexican food, go neighborhood hunting, and squeeze in as much sex and cuddling as we can.
TheOtherMe September 3, 2011, 11:40 am
I love that you said sex first, cuddling second 😀
SpaceySteph September 3, 2011, 12:48 pm
I live in Houston which had a brutal summer, record breaking heat and drought. 30 of the 31 days last month were above 100 degrees, with heat index above 110. Insane. I am more than happy to kiss this summer goodbye!
Also as I said above, my birthday is Sept 2nd so labor day is my favorite postal holiday.
And my best friend since 1st grade (we are bday buddies, she’s Sept 4th) got engaged last night!
And I’m on my way to a week long beach vacation in NC with my bf and some other friends. Yay labor day!!!
Wendy September 3, 2011, 3:52 pm
Happy belated bday, fellow Virgo (mine is the 8th)!
SpaceySteph September 4, 2011, 11:14 pm
Thanks! I call anyone within a week a birthday buddy, and that includes you! Happy almost bday!
MonMon September 7, 2011, 11:59 am
I was the 5th, so hello birthday buddies! 🙂
Caroline September 3, 2011, 5:39 pm
I am so jealous you are going to NC! I live in Houston also and this summer has just been so, so, SO brutal. Everything is so dead and dry here and it really breaks my heart. I cannot wait for it to get colder, and I’m hoping a tropical storm will hit us (what a terrible thing to say, I know) so we can get some much-needed rain. We’re losing 66 million trees because of this drought!
As for Labor Day plans, I will be sleeping, doing schoolwork, seeing friends, and seeing my boyfriend. Nothing too exciting, but I may do some traveling over my fall break.
Maracuya September 3, 2011, 11:34 pm
Plus all the water main breaks! The roads are becoming, if possible, even crappier.
Caroline September 4, 2011, 3:20 am
Amen to that! I hate driving around Montrose, the streets are HORRIBLE!
SpaceySteph September 4, 2011, 11:20 pm
Yes it has been the worst summer ever. Or at least since I moved to Houston in 08 for work. I love my job but the city was basically unbearable this summer. Hopefully a good winter will make me want to stay. I’m with you on the tropical storm, we are so desperate for rain! My yard and my bf’s in League City are completely dead, and mine us only a year old. Terrible drought.
Side mote: awesome to “meet” so many fellow Houstonians, although I wish we were all a bit less miserable!
Painted_lady September 5, 2011, 11:15 pm
It was insane this summer! I’m over in Meyerland, and my house is settling like crazy because of the drought – we have to keep the trash in the garage to keep my very badly behaved dog out of it, and we can’t close the door now, so we’re constantly ferrying trash bags to the city cans on the driveway or picking up trash in the garage. Also, the gas and sewer lines both cracked over the summer, so our backyard is all torn up and hasn’t recovered because everything’s dead anyway. At least it was hot enough that cold showers felt good.
Happy belated, SpaceySteph, and happy early birthday Wendy – I’m the 14th, so yay for Virgos.
TrixyMinx September 3, 2011, 11:36 pm
I can’t wait for the cool weather. I’m soo sick of getting up at 4 so I can beat the heat on the hiking trails.
Bekah September 4, 2011, 1:02 am
I don’t get Labor Day where I am at, but I just moved and am starting a new job Monday. So I will be settling and grocery shopping and lesson planning new classes. I am super nervous about this new phrase in my life. I am excited but it has been so stressful getting here. I hope that I will be setting myself up for a better school year than last year.
fallonthecity September 4, 2011, 2:46 am
This weekend I’m catching up on homework and finishing up a paper I have in a conference at the first of October. Which is actually what I’m looking forward to most this fall — I leave for that conference, which is in Cape Town, on the 29th!! So excited.
Happy Labor Day weekend, everybody!
blackbird September 4, 2011, 6:56 am
Hey everybody! I hope you’re all having a good Labor Day Weekend so far. I will be working, the whole time. But at least on Monday, I’m getting time and a half. The highlight of my summer was definitely moving to Chicago! I’m excited to see the seasons change. I’m from Arizona, where the seasons are Summer and Not Quite Summer, so seeing red and yellow leaves everywhere with the combination of crisp air will certainly be a change.
I wrote in to a weekend thread a few weeks ago about a close friend (we’ll call her Jane) who came and visited and was an all-around horrible houseguest. I had written out an email to Jane that detailed every rude thing she did. I had no intention of ever sending it to her, but it helped me get out the initial anger I had towards her and outline the discussion I would eventually have with her. I only picked out the major issues – not paying for anything, badmouthing my hosting capabilities, and making me feel like she wasn’t happy for my boyfriend and me – and talked to her for a few hours over the phone. She ended up crying and telling me she had been thinking about the money stuff since she left, but wasn’t aware of any of the other issues. She was really apologetic and said that she felt terrible about the way she treated us and she hoped we could have her back in the winter.
One of the main points I touched on was that a lot of the behaviors she was exhibiting reminded me of when I was first out on my own – and how it caused me to lose friends by being selfish. I told her this, hoping she’d take it to heart. I know that lessons like this aren’t learned overnight, but the day after our phone call, it seems she’s already lost some friends by being spoiled and expecting people to cater to her. Long story short, my best friend from back home called to tell me she’s done with Jane because of a miscommunication with a road trip that was planned this weekend between her and her boyfriend (Jane invited herself on their trip – and a boy she said she was no longer interested in, but said that she wanted some companionship). I guess she threw a fit. So… I’m going to wait a while. We don’t live in the same state anymore, so I’m definitely able to take an effective break from her for a bit.
Thanks for the advice, guys! Using the phone instead of email made it a conversation instead of a lecture. Hopefully she’ll mature soon and we’ll be able to be friends again. I apologize for the long comment; I just had to get it all out.
lets_be_honest September 4, 2011, 9:08 pm
Love the Wendy the Riveter photo! The highlight of my Labor Day was my daughter finally mastering a bike without training wheels. She’s feeling very proud of herself tonight, as am I.
Painted_lady September 5, 2011, 11:29 pm
Labor Day weekend was wonderful for me. I got a three-day weekend after two very long weeks at school, and I needed the break from my kids. I also had to work all last weekend because I was helping host an outside group at my school, so three days off was wonderful.
Painted_dude came in for the long weekend because it was our anniversary. We’ve been together a year and been friends for 16. He was supposed to move in over the summer, but we had to push that back a bit, so we’re both a little more sad when we have to say goodbye as it wasn’t what we planned on doing. But Friday night we went out with some friends at a bar I love on the beach, then we went and walked in the sand for a bit. The water was crazy high because of a tropical storm surge, so it was kind of hilarious when the first wave rolled in and drenched us both up to our knees. Saturday we had a lazy day and cooked and watched movies all day – it’s sort of a joke between us that when we watch movies I always fall asleep, and I didn’t disappoint this time, either. Sunday we drove up to my parents’ lake house and spent the day with my entire family, and it was a really fun day. It was too windy to go out on the lake, but we sat out on the deck and played bad 80s music and ate ridiculously wonderful fattening food and drank beer till midnight. Then he left this morning and I miss him already 🙁
MsMisery September 8, 2011, 1:58 pm
I just got back from my Labor Day vacation: my yearly geek pilgrimage to Atlanta for a sci-fi convention 🙂