New readers, welcome to Dear Wendy, a relationship advice blog. Read some of the most popular Dear Wendy posts here. If you don’t find the info you need in this column, please visit the Dear Wendy archives or the forums (you can even start your own thread), do a search in the search bar, or submit a question for advice at wendy(AT)dearwendy.com.
In a feature I call “Your Turn,” in which you, the readers, get to answer the question, I’m presenting the following letter without commentary from me:
We’ve talked about it, and she typically refuses. If I beg enough, she will do it on very, very rare occasions. But she often sabotages the mood by adding one thing that is totally ridiculous to the outfit. This drives me completely nuts because my wife is just drop-dead gorgeous. Of course, if you ask her, she doesn’t think she is. But I can’t believe my luck that I married such a hottie, only to have things go this way — it’s like someone owning a Ferrari and having no gas.
I DON’T expect her to be a sex bomb everyday, or even every week, but once every month or two would be nice. She claims that REAL women never dress up in something sexy to surprise their husbands when they come home from work. Examples like: cooking naked in the kitchen; only wearing an apron to make things interesting for dinner; her not wearing underwear when we go out for dinner at a restaurant; or even her wearing something hot and meeting her husband at the door after work are actually things that you only see in the movies or on prime-time. She says that no one actually does these kinds of things in real life. Heck, I’d settle for her just to do some of these things for me even just ONCE.
One late afternoon when I was a teenager, I even remember coming home unexpectedly early one time and surprising my very embarrassed mother. Mom was wearing some lingerie and was waiting inside the front door, in anticipation of my father coming home from work (obviously, I very quickly left, and both of us were very embarrassed about the entire incident). My point being is that married people occasionally do these things to spice up their love life. Ideas such as these are in almost every women’s magazine, and they are talked about in books that are written to help wake up a couple’s love life. But to her, no one really does these kinds of things.
Am I just being unrealistic when I ask her to do these types of things occasionally? — Husband of a Hottie
You can follow me on Facebook here and sign up for my weekly newsletter here.
If you have a relationship/dating question I can help answer, you can send me your letters at email@example.com.