In a feature I call “Your Turn,” in which you, the readers, get to answer the question, I’m presenting the following letter without commentary from me:
I have recently developed feelings for my supervisor at work, who flirts with me all the time. He has everything I deserve: he’s honest, thoughtful, free-spirited, confident and has an unbelievable amount of ambition. I am so attracted to the way he commands the attention when he steps into a room. At work I am the girl he will come to for anything he needs (work-related), and he seems to express interest in me. Recently, I met with him outside of work to hang out. He asked for a back massage and I thought “YES, MY BIG CHANCE!” But nothing happened, even though throughout the massage he got “happy” (couldn’t think of a cleaner way to say that). He suggested we do something and I rejected him. That was hard for me to do because I like him so much, but I’m not that type of girl. He kept assuming I was upset … which I was — at myself, for I felt I lost my chance.
Considering what I have been through with my boyfriend, I want the next man to work for me (my supervisor thinks I’m single by the way). He’s not looking for a relationship because he’s concentrating on buying a condo and setting himself up first, which I respect. He continues to flirt with me, though. How do I know if he’s waiting to be set up to make me his girlfriend or if this is strictly platonic? — Miss Understood