Your Turn: “I Was the Other Woman and He Dumped Me”

In a feature I call “Your Turn,” in which you, the readers, get to answer the question, I’m presenting the following letter without commentary from me: I met this guy, “Rick,” four years ago when I was sleeping with his best friend who is now my son’s biological father. Rick and I HATED each other at first. After some time, as things with my son’s father went downhill, Rick and I started talking more and more and becoming good friends. He helped heal my heart after I broke up with my son’s father. We have always been attracted to each other but it always seemed too off-limits. Eventually, he met his now-girlfriend…

“Oops, I Cheated”

It’s time again for Shortcuts. For every question, I’ll give my advice in three sentences or less, because sometimes the answer to a person’s question is so obvious and the need to hear it so great, being as clear and frank as possible is simply the best way to go. Today we discuss cheating, mixed signals, and financially supporting a significant other.

“My Boyfriend Doesn’t Pay Attention to Me”

On paper I have a good boyfriend — he is sweet, helpful, willing to accommodate my needs, and always has my back. However, I have been feeling for a long time like something is “off” and only recently figured out what it was. He has been described by others as self-centered, an attribution that he willingly admits to. I told him that I feel like he is generally more interested in and entertained by whatever is in his own life and his own head than anything I have to say. For example, he laughs far more at his own jokes than he does at mine (maybe I’m just not funny?…) and while…

“Can I Have a Real Relationship with my FWB?”

Since September, I’ve been having a “NSA”/ very casual relationship with a guy I met online. We’re both in our mid-twenties. Initially, we met solely for sex. We’re both in high-pressure, time-consuming professions. The thing is, I’m starting to develop feelings for him and want an actual relationship now and I’m wondering if that’s possible. We only communicate with one another in order to find out if the other person is available to hook-up. We usually meet about once every week or so. After sex, we don’t usually cuddle and one of us usually makes an excuse about needing to go do something because we’re busy. This past week, however, he started…

Your Turn: “Is It Time to MOA?”

In a feature I call “Your Turn,” in which you, the readers, get to answer the question, I’m presenting the following letter without commentary from me: I consider my boyfriends one of my best friends, and I love him very much, but I don’t know if he is “the one.” He is in a band, and while he has a full-time job, he is perfectly content to keep going as he is, not really pushing himself when it comes to getting a better job, financial security, etc. — all things that are important to me. We have broken up twice, but always get back together. He is very kind and loving, but…

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