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I work in Toxicology, specifically with a drug testing program in a workplace. At least in the US, there are mechanisms to detect fake pee. Creatinine measurement in the sample being one of them. You can be fired from either testing positive or trying to adulterate the sample. So, if your friends have never tested positive in 10 years, perhaps it’s because their consumption didn’t match the times their sample was taken, but, believe me, fake pee always gets detected.

I have two friends who have left fot the UK, one married to a british man and the other one married to a friend of mine, both of them from our country. For my friend who married a british man, the process to get a visa was super long, even after they were married she couldn’t go with him and had to stay here for six months. She was allowed to work until after they had been married two years. Getting the visa was hard because he had to prove that he could provide for her.
The other one met and married a friend of mine who went to the UK to get his PhD. They met there, married here and a month later she had her visa to go join him. They both have work and study visas, and the process was much easier.

Congratulations @Veritek! You deserve it!

@Copa I have friends like that too. And I think that is one of the saddest parts of adulthood, growing apart from your friends.

I know life is lonely sometimes but this year I’ve felt the loneliest ever, sometimes even during my relationship. I have had suicidal thoughts, I know how I would commit suicide if I ever did, all of that. Those thoughts ended when I broke up but have recently resurfaced.
I did have a therapist but he became insanely expensive, I can’t afford him now and honestly, he wasn’t that much help anyways.
Sometimes I reach out to friends but they are almost all busy most of the time. I don’t feel like I have a secure circle of friends.
I’m not going to lie, and obviously this is all linked to seeing my ex super happy all pver the place. I even found out that his best friend (woman, married) gave him a trip to Cancun for his upcoming birthday. No one would ever do such a thing for me. And I am a good person.
That is why I hate comparisons. Because I compare myself to what other people have and end up feeling like shit.
Changing jobs is a MUST but nothing good has come up yet.
And I do think it is about changing my narrative. I need to change the way I view things that is why I’ve only allowed myself to be sad today and starting tomorrow I will start to try and think of all the things I have instead of the ones I don’t.

I totally understand the talk about marriage without wanting to get married now. I had those with my ex. It’s like where is this going, if I eventually want to get married, will you? Just so I don’t waste any more time on this.
People function in many ways. My sister married her boyfriend without living together before and it has worked very good for them.
I never wanted to get married in my 20’s either, but that was back when I thought I would find someone to marry. Now that I’m approacching my 32nd birthday, I don’t know.