Ale
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Thanks everyone for the good thoughts.
So, on wednesday I was bitching here about ending up alone but doing nothing about it. So, I decided to take action, downloaded Tinder again and matched with ten dudes in half an hour. Decided to pull a “Copa” and messaged all of them just to see what I got.
All of them responded but I only followed up on one, who seemed like the most interesting one. Very interesting dude, german living here and we moved the conversation to text.
We texted yesterday, he is funny and smart. I decided that I wanted to meet him without texting too much, like many people here have recommended. So I asked him out this weekend. He said he already had a trip planned. And stopped answering. So, maybe too forward?
Anyways, I know that this takes patience and time. I have felt that way many times, but most of the time I feel happy and fine. One of my longtime friends is coming back after spending 5 years in France getting her PhD, and she is single too, so I can’t wait for her to come back. She is the funniest and most adventurous person I know and when she was here we planned trips almost every weekend and we had a lot of fun. That’s what I need right now.@TheLadyE that is a great update!
So… this thread is approaching two years now. So much has changed in two years. I remember when I first started reading this thread I was happy I was not dating but in a relationship. And now I’m on the other side. Really afraid that I’ll end up alone.Happy birthday MissDre! You deserve roses and more.
@Copa I want to know the outcome of your experiment.
I agreed to his friendship request because I wanted to see what he looked like and because I am actually very private in Facebook. I think I have about 30 photos total. Two of them were with my ex and were from last year. I never post anything there. I never add anyone that I have never met but I did it with this guy. Anyways, looking back I see a lot of red flags now (constantly asking about my ex was one).
@ktfran I was actually pretty meh about the date and the guy. I was only hoping for a good meal and a good conversation. I think I saved myself from a very awkward meal.Rookie mistake, I know. Online dating is hard. After I started talking to this guy on Tinder I deleted the app. I have no desire to use it again, at least for now.
Now I know that, don’t add someone on FB until you know them well… However, I wanted to see what he looked like better, before going on a date. When he added me on FB I looked through a couple of pictures just to get an idea. Bad move, and won’t do it again.
I was going on a first date on wednesday with the guy I posted here earlier from Tinder, but I cancelled. Dude started behaving really weird. First he texted me to confirm place and time with some serious spelling mistakes. He had never texted like that. Then he told me he had an appointment for a class at my old box. When I mentioned I don’t go there anymore he was surprised… I told him that when we first started talking.
Then he texted me a pic from the box, which featured my ex boyfriend front and center. (I added him on Facebook two weeks ago and he saw all my pics, including old ones with my ex. He then proceeded to ask me if I had a boyfriend. I told him no and he kept asking about it).
When he texted the pic I told him well, that’s my ex right there. I’m sure that’s what he wanted to hear. Then he told me “well, your ex is a dick”. He used a much harsher word but I dont’ know how to translate it. I let it slide and asked how was the class. He proceeded to tell me how shitty my box was and how he had hated it. So I told him that I didn’t want to go out. He kind of begged and just ended up blocking him. Weird dude.On the days I was on Tinder I talked to a guy that seemed really impressed I had a job where I work, because it’s with the government and it’s not that easy to work here and has lots of benefits. So there were some questions like “who helped you get this job?”. Well, nobody, I got it myself…
So, yeah there are insecure men all around. I hate those kind of comments.@Copa DON’T TAKE IT PERSONALLY.
“what was so terrible about me that they just disappeared”
Most likely it had nothing to do with you, but with them. Don’t think it’s your fault.@Copa Well, you’re right, that’s a good approach. Good luck! And please update!
I remember before I started dating my ex I had been single for three years. I was so happy single that whoever came to my life had to be really amazing and I made my ex wait a long time so I knew it was serious. I didn’t want to let go of my singlehood. And now I’m trying to remember those days, what I did, why I was so happy. I have a lot of thoughts in my mind, some days it makes me happy to get home and not have to cook dinner for someone and some days that’s what makes me sad.
