Reply To: Struggling with a Loveless Marriage and Fear of Being Alone – Seeking Advice

And the reason I say a therapist who works with South Asians, is that they’re likely to understand the family dynamics that mess you up. The cultural stuff that’s unique. You also say you have mental health issues, at least 3 different things, which I don’t know if they’ve been diagnosed or properly treated.

It’s interesting that you keep mentioning “respect.” You think you need respect, but you married someone who you say puts you down. Your father put your mother down, and it sounds like he was really awful to her, but the only thing you really said about her was that she constantly pitied herself. And I mean there’s a lot of self-pity in your post. You seem to be playing out a similar dynamic in your own relationship to what you saw with your parents. And you know you don’t want to do that to your kid. I do think if you left this relationship, you’d be better off. You wouldn’t have to agonize about it anymore. You could focus more on your mental health. The time you spend with your child could be quality time. It doesn’t really sound like there’s anything worth saving here. Please go find a good therapist to talk to. You can feel better and improve your life.