Advice on something that’s probably a really stupid dilemma…. please
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- This topic has 72 replies, 6 voices, and was last updated 1 year, 8 months ago by Anonymousse.
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You literally did say that:
“ I have empathy for the woman who attack the guys as well. As they themselves have been victims of what is obviously inappropriate behaviour to say the least. Their personal experience can sometimes cloud there judgement,”
That’s not what’s happening here though. The people commenting on this post have crystal clear judgment of the situation.
AnonymousseAugust 31, 2022 at 6:58 am #1115696Pants feelings is somehow offensive or insulting? That’s what they are.
Try being a woman in basic training in charge of hundreds of young men, probably countless who get these crushes on her. Can you ever contemplate or imagine how difficult that must be? To always be seen as a potential date, not a superior?
It’s not right to approach women at their place of work, business, etc. It is not. I’m sorry you disagree but that doesn’t make me wrong, WDWE. Your issues with your body and getting dates is not any women’s fault or responsibility to change for you.
Maybe you’re less empathetic and compassionate to women. I can certainly see that just by your comments. Perhaps you’d have more luck with women if you viewed them as equal human beings and not terrible people that always turn you down.
AnonymousseAugust 31, 2022 at 7:08 am #1115699Who is letting their personal experiences cloud their judgement?
I don’t think it’s the group, WDWE. You just gave an in depth look into why “modern methods to meet single women who want to date” won’t work for any man and thus, men have no choice but to cold approach woman at work.
I mean, really. Is this what you think is right and correct?
“Continued abuse of this man,” up mean when he comments and we reply? Anyone can get off their computers at any time. It’s a choice to stay in gopher conversation. I don’t think you truly have any idea of what abuse is. Are we being dry, blunt, to the point? Yes, because over the years we’ve answered so many questions like this. And that’s kind of this sites and Wendy’s style. If you don’t like that, you are also free to go or build your own advice website, catered to the poor disenfranchised white men 18-30.
golfer.galAugust 31, 2022 at 7:17 am #1115704I… Just.. wow. An advice site owned by a woman, moderated by women, and largely used by women is not “catering well” to men aged 18-30. Have you been literally anywhere else on the internet? Do you think Reddit is a place where everyone is nice and no one ever piles on? This site is, by and large, incredibly supportive and respectful.
If we could just deliver our good advice with the right amount of softness and kindness, it would be worth listening to! But instead we are perpetuating the cycle of trauma (!) by not keeping sweet. It’s low key hilarious that you admit the advice is good, but because it’s said in a fairly straightforward manner, or because multiple people had the same fairly stern advice, it’s abusive and an attack.
You realize there’s a term for the “compliment” you gave Kate, right? It’s called negging and it’s sexist crap. Telling her she “sometimes fails” but tries really hard for the empathetic tone it’s important for women to have, and also good on her! Because your personal interactions with her haven’t been unpleasant. Pleasantness is also an important characteristic for women, apparently.
Also, having personal experience informing that good advice is actually a problem because it “clouds our judgement” – good point, better to have someone with literally no experience give incorrect, but somehow more sound because it’s “unbiased”, advice. There’s a word for that. Man… Manshooking? Manspooking? Oh. Right.
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