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Thank you for your wisdom once again JD, glad to hear an expert weigh in as always : )
Happy New Year to both of you as well. I did re-edit my responseto you RT.
I will do and tbh, I think that’s good advice about being the grown up and not caring so much.
I think particularly about my daughter’s reading age and ability to differentiate between different products. At the age of 4, this is an incredible quality and one I will look to continue to nurture.
Some people look to nurture, some want to tear others down. Best for me to ignore that and it’s my job to protect her from that.
Thanks! Have a Happy New Year.
I kinda did let it go. The idea of equitable in this case is simple.
SIL got a load of presents. On appearance it looked like she spent an excessive amount more than I spent on her kids. She also specifically verbalised this when I asked her, to suggest she had spent a lot more money than I had.
I had spent quite a bit on her kids, but as stated it appears she spent considerably more. She’s left that opinion there.
That was what I was asking about, then all of a sudden there were a load of attacks because my daughter enjoyed watching youtube and then further attacks because I said I was proud about my daughter’s reading age.
I wrote in because there seemed to be some good advice out there. But when people give advice, I would have expected it to come from thier own background, rather than JD talking about reading ages being wrong without thinking about other countries, she just made an assumption I was lying, which was further compunded when she admitted that she didn’t have any children and didn’t really know much about reading ages. However her tone was factual and authoritive, it just got my back up.
But yeah, I guess I’ll stop posting.
PS – I spoke to my brother about the situation, apparently the pastor called it off before they actually got married and she has been talking about me everytime she sees the SIL and she got fed up with it, hence why I was disinvited to that BBQ.
I am proud of her.
But yes, she reads them to me, obviously she doesn’t get every single word, but she has a good idea whats going on, so when I ask her questions ‘so who went to Charn?’ she answers back ‘Digory and Polly’ or what was the horse’s name? ‘Strawberry’ etc. She understands Uncle Andrew isn’t a nice man.
JD just seemed very alarmed at the prospect for whatever reason. Although s/he is saying that’s not the case. I just don’t understand how someone else’s child doing well at school got thier back up?
I’ve done an undergrad (2.1), working on my postgrad. I was an early reader and I find that getting a headstart, allows you to build up some slack time and if it’s something she enjoys I’m pleased. I’m also pleased on a level, that she can tell the difference between real and fake products, note it is me who is pondering the morals of it/it being equitable, she is still pleased as punch.
The advice seems to be, not to watch youtube. Well she likes seeing the toys on youtube and her and cousin (other side) love playing and talking about them, so I’m certainly not going to punish her by stopping her watching some as a treat.
Yes, JD they are ranked down into age group, and then marked developing etc. She’s been assessed at the next age group up.
Wow, I’ve really touched a nerve here haven’t I?
Good one Ruby.
Oh, hang on, she’s reading the Chronicles of Narnia at 4 years old and is top of the class for reading at ages well above her.
And she has gone to parties each week for the last month. She is a clever girl and I was surprised but also pleased how she is able to notice things at such an early age.
Looks like your ploy to try and put someone else down hasn’t worked.
Good one JD. I’ll do what I want thanks. I appreciate that you don’t get the excitment aand knowledge that youtube can bring.
Yeah, I forget to mention there have been some health warnings with fake lol products specifically.
https://www.thetimes.co.uk/article/chemicals-in-fake-lol-dolls-no-laughing-matter-2t2nszvbr
I did explain to her, that it was still a present. However, she is still running around saying she likes ‘fake’ and ‘real’ lol toys. Also, she has older friends/relatives on the other side who are quite fake/real conscious.
The SIL can get quite funny, if I get say, a Disney product instead of a ‘Monster High’ doll. I just want it to be equitable.
But, yeah, she is a bright kid. We’re 2 books into the Chronicles of Narnia, she can name all the continents and oceans on the atlas and maybe about half a dozen countries, understands the differences between all of the Big Cats and can do basic sums. I have gently nudged this, but not trying to go overboard. I’m really proud of her.
You can’t trick someone into liking you.
Think about someone you like but are not attracted to. Now, if they laid on the charm, would you find them attractive?
To be honest, you have built all this in you head and put her on a pedastal. If she’s half as bright as you make out, she’s proably worked it out anyway and also decided on what she would do if you made a move.
So, make a move. Don’t be weird, or try to ‘breaken the wall’. Ask her for a coffee, bowling etc, if she suggests a friend, say you were hoping just the two of you. If she says it’s too far away, then you know what, it wouldn’t work anyway.
If she says no, at least she’ll respect you for having the guts to ask and her and it will be out in the open.
You know what? When I was your age, I was mooning over someone (ah, the lovely Hazel). I never did anything and everyone in our group knew about it. She was non-committal because she liked the attention.
PS- she’s not a puzzzle, she’s just a person like you and me, who needs to eat, sleep and poops like the rest of the world.
