Ale
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He insisted on going, he wanted to go with me and he wanted to do CrossFit, we had been dating for two years. We went together, it was nice at first, then I was “X’s girlfriend” and not Ale. Then we broke up, and it sucked. When I asked him to leave the gym because I was there first, he said that was not an option. I was lucky to find another gym closer and nice, I’ve been there for a year, but I had to stop doing CrossFit. So I guess maybe if I dated someone and he wanted to go to the same gym I’d ask what if we breakup? Ok if we break up, you get the gym. We never discussed that. It would have been helpful.
Well, when I broke up with my coworker ex I also had to leave my CrossFit gym that I loved for 4 years, so how about that?
Moral of the story is: when you date, do not mix your WHOLE life with the other person. I had to leave my gym, and everyone advised to leave my job. He never thought of leaving either. Now I think that if I met someone I would not like them going to the same gym. Or if I dated someone from my gym, I would probably leave and find another one. And I would never ever date a coworker again.LadyE: I’m sending you good thoughts. I hope it all works out well. I’m totally biased though because in my case it is a living hell. My mental health took a toll from dating a coworker. You say you already have feelings for this person, but you have been on one date. So I hope you’re being much more cautious than the impression I get.
My advice would be DO NOT date your coworker. Never. Ever. It’s caca.
@theladye that’s so cool.
@Copa at least you know you are not compatible and won’t pursue him, which is much better than most LWs here. Also just try to remember that the way he handled things has nothing to do with you.No, neither of us changed jobs. It was hard specially because I kept seeing him and even saw him a lot with his best friend who was a third person during our whole relationship and who even had a lot to do with out breakup and who works there too. It seemed like everywhere I looked, there they were. I think I’m not over it yet but my job is way too good to leave. And having the realization that getting over it was going to be harder, because he is always there, actually does help. This means that at first I said “I’ll never get over it working here” and the I changed it to “I will get over it, it will be harder though”. Changing the narrative does help
I understand completely. I felt the same at work, the minute I was out, I was much calmer and chill. But when I had to to go to work I was miserable. Don’t feel sorry for how you feel, you’re entitled to your feelings, even if it wasnt a big relationship. You were ok before him and you will be ok after him. No advice here, really, just empathy, and I can tell you, guaranteed, that it does get better. One day you won’t care.
Do what’s best for you. You can block him but not unfriend him.
I do think you are putting way too much thought on what he thinks. We do that constantly (we, women).
I broke up with my ex a year ago and only as recent as last week I was able to block him on whatsapp, because I was worried of what he would think. He called me as soon as he found out. But I did what I had to do to take care of myself. No one is going to take care of yourself. He didn’t care. You shouldn’t.Oh Copa. So sorry. That must be hard to swallow right now. Do something really nice for yourself today. Including blocking him and unfriending him.
Also, who the hell is FB official this days. I though that was over like ages ago. I think it’s corny, specially if you’ve been dating a couple weeks or months.TheHizzy, so sorry for your loss.
Sounds like a big fat jerk! He’s an idiot Copa. You told him what you had to, it’s not your fault. It’s ok. It’s a good thing that he now knows that he is going through life as a jerk. And if he doesn’t move it shouldn’t concern you, because you will be fine by then.
“never seems to listen to what I want out of life”
Do YOU ever listen to what he wants out of HIS life?
I think he was honest from the beginning, maybe so you wouldn’t waste your time and that’s fine. I do think that if he has this kind of preferences, he should be looking somewhere else. I don’t think (and don’t understand why people think) this is appropriate to look for in dating apps. Maybe I’m wrong I don’t know, but I would use other resources.
Same thing happens to me on tinder. People tell me all kinds of stuff about my looks. I think I’m pretty but I’m not a Victoria secret model.it gets pretty akward pretty soon. One guy even told me once that if I dated him I’d be dating a very heavy person and would I be ok with that (his photos didn’t show that).
I talked to a guy from tinder the last time I was there and stopped responding because he was unbelievably boring. That was like maybe two months ago? And then yesterday he found me on Instagram and requested to follow me. Not nice.
