BlueKate
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It’s still not okay, and is still racist, even if she’s hearing it in passing. Obviously it’s said loud enough for her to hear. If someone (black, white, whoever) would say loud enough, but not directly to her “Look at those chinks moving in” or if white people were going to say “look at all those black people moving in” etc. Racism is a very real thing, and it’s directed at all groups, not just “minorities” (while in the US a group may be a minority, that same group can be a majority in a particular region). There are also minority on minority racism and crime, especially with black on asian crime in the Bay Area, because while Asians are a US minority, they’re a majority in some cities/towns in the Bay Area.
And while people want to call her out for her alleged racism because she described a neighborhood a certain way, well, it’s unfair if the majority of that neighborhood is african american, and she constantly hears anti-white rhetoric from people in that neighborhood, to then call her racist. I’m sure as someone of Asian descent she is well acquainted with racism (as it’s probably been used against her, and probably her own peers/family use may be racists towards non-asians).
On that note, I think it’s completely unreasonable for everyone to say that her observation of blatant racism against her and her bf isn’t valid. If she was white and said, “Hey Black girl!” to the only black girl in the store/coffee shop/whatever, then she’d be called a racist. But apparently it’s fine to do that to white people, or even asian people in her case? Racism is not okay, period. She is seeing and experiencing racism, from other racial groups directed at both her (of Asian descent) and to her bf and his friends (Caucasians). It’s still racism, even when directed at the “majority” group.
Living in the Bay Area, I can understand your apprehensive attitude to particular areas that are experiencing very aggressive gentrification, which is causing a lot of backlash (from protesters outside newly built/bought houses, protesters blocking busses that pick up tech people, graffiti specifically attacking new residents because of their work and/or race, etc.) I get you’re worried, but I would just stop bothering with it. He’ll learn the hard way. My fiance, who’s from out of town, didn’t understand why I would always tell him to lock the car doors, make sure the windows were rolled up, and that there was nothing visible inside the car. Till one day he forgot to roll up the back window, and someone stole everything (from inside, from the trunk, etc.) Hopefully if something like that ever happens to your bf, it’ll be a minor thing and he would easily be able to replace his cards, etc.
