MMcG

To throw out a completely different way of thinking about it… other cultures totally use the woman’s name or have other ways of going about it. so instead of it being a misinterpreted statement about commitment, maybe think outside the box and get creative.

My ex bf took his wife’s last name and hyphenated (his name first, then hers, whereas she just kept her name). It’s how I found out he had gotten married, which kinda sucked, but then when I looked into it was really interesting.  I give you Spanish nomenclature, via wikipedia, but there are similar
Spanish naming customs are those practiced in Spain. They are similar to those in other Spanish-speaking countries. In Spain, a person’s name consists of a given name (simple or composite) followed by two family names(surnames). The first surname was traditionally the father’s first surname, and the second the mother’s first surname. In Spain this order may now be reversed, according to a new gender equality law.
Currently in Spain, people bear a single or composite given name (nombre) and two surnames (apellidos). A composite given name comprises two (not more) single names; Juan Pablo is considered not to be a first and a second forename, but a single composite forename. Traditionally, a person’s first surname is the father’s first surname (apellido paterno), and the second one is the mother’s first surname (apellido materno). However, gender equality law has allowed surname transposition since 1999,[1] subject to the condition that every sibling must bear the same surname order recorded in the Registro Civil (civil registry), but there have been legal exceptions. From 2013, if the parents of a child are unable to agree on order of surnames, an official decides which is to come first.[2]
For example, if a man named Eduardo Fernández Garrido marries a woman named María Dolores Martínez Ruiz and have a child named Eduardo, there are several legal options, but their child would most usually be known as Eduardo Fernández Martínez.
Each surname can also be composite, the parts usually linked by the preposition de (of) or by a hyphen. For example, a person’s name might be Juan Pablo Fernández de Calderón García-Iglesias, consisting of a forename (Juan Pablo), a paternal surname (Fernández de Calderón) and a maternal surname (García-Iglesias).

Oh and just for the record, this is one of those that regardless of what you do there will be some judgment and commentary… just to be forewarned. And if you do decide to keep your maiden name, remember that it isn’t just your SO that may feel rejected but your inlaws as well and they may share they feeling with you (had it happen to a friend, the future MIL would bring it up at family dinners during their engagement — AWKWARD!)

I have no problem taking my husband’s name, but I was still really pissy about the fact that when I returned to work after my wedding everyone assumed I had done it and all I got was “congratulations, what’s your new name?” over and over and I would reply, very dryly… “MMcG, and if I actually finish the paperwork and make any changes, you’ll see it on my email.”