It’s time again for “Dear Wendy Updates,” a feature where people I’ve given advice to in the past let us know whether they followed the advice and how they’re doing today. After the jump, we hear from “Half Broke Idea” who was bothered that her boyfriend, who had agreed that they should contribute a percentage of their respective incomes toward rent, was suddenly changing his tune once he got a much better paying job. Keep reading to see whether they’ve resolved their issues regarding how to cover their living expenses.
If we did the income split thing I thought we were planning on, I’d be contributing about 600/month and he’d be contributing 1500/month (for all our bills, rent and food). Since the apartment is $1250 a month, on its face it does seem like my boyfriend would be covering the whole apartment. But at the same time $600 IS half the rent (almost, and anyway he has the parking spot). So, with all of that in mind, I had another conversation with my boyfriend. I apologized for making assumptions when we should have discussed all of this in deeper detail before we moved in together, and he seemed mollified by that. Then I told him that I’d thought about it and I would be able to split the rent if he would also pay for the bills and a lot of the groceries.
The thing that’s funny is that it’s the exact same amount of money, but phrasing it that way seemed to make him feel SO much better. And honestly it makes me feel better too, because now I feel like the apartment is just as much mine as his. That was another thing the comments on my question really made me analyze, the downfalls of being a “kept woman” (or whatever), such as whether he’d hold it against me any time I wanted to change something in the apartment. Now I don’t have to worry about it because I’m paying my half of the rent.
In other news, my boyfriend hasn’t brought up a “job deadline” again, thank god. I think he realized that idea was awful and kind of insulting. Nonetheless, I have a job interview tomorrow, so wish me luck…
Thank you so much for your insightful advice, and also to all of the people who took the time to comment on my predicament. I know my boyfriend didn’t exactly shine in my letter, but the commenters helped me see it a bit from his perspective, too, and with this new plan I think we’ll be okay.
That’s great news! Glad you guys reached a resolution you’re both comfortable with. Best of luck to you!
If you’re someone I’ve given advice to in the past, I’d love to hear from you, too. Email me at email@example.com with a link to the original post, and let me know whether you followed the advice and how you’re doing now.