Columns

I am married and have no children. I have one brother whom I am not close to and he has two children I have no relationship with. We live in different states and I never see them. My niece and nephew were not close to my mother, but her wishes when she passed away were that her diamond ring be given to my nephew. My mother passed away last month, and I told my father I had never heard of a diamond ring not given to a daughter. I was extremely close to my mother. My mother’s reason for giving her ring to my nephew was that she wanted the ring passed…

I met a guy six months ago who, on the first date (he asked me out for a drink), told me he is ending his second marriage and has one kid from each marriage. He is still fighting in court to close marriage number two; they’ve been separated for a year. He told me from the beginning he isn’t ready for a relationship and just wanted a friend without the pressure of expectations. He also said he wanted to build a solid foundation for a future by being friends first and moving slowly. I understood this clearly and agreed that going slowly was good. We are six months into hanging out as…

I’ve been dating my long-distance boyfriend for almost two years. I live four hours away but see him every weekend. I have a fellowship position that is coming to an end this month. My boyfriend has been expecting me to move in with him once the fellowship is complete. I love him so so much and don’t want to lose him, but I am terrified of moving and losing everything I’ve worked so hard for. Our relationship has been pretty bad at points in the last year, including emotional and physical abuse on multiple occasions. He says that will all stop and that the long distance is the problem. I’m worried that…

It’s time again for “Dear Wendy Updates,” a feature where people I’ve given advice to in the past let us know whether they followed the advice and how they’re doing now. Today we hear from “Agreement Broached!” who wanted to clarify some things about his letter I posted and answered on Tuesday in which he complains that his ex introduced her new boyfriend to their shared son before introducing him to the LW. Warning: it’s long. Maybe grab some coffee. Or some bourbon. Or pour bourbon in your coffee.

I’ve been with my boyfriend, “Daryl” for four years. He’s 30, no kids, never married. I’m a few years older, never married, and a single mom to a boy (my son has a very close relationship with his dad and they see each other regularly). I have a higher level of education than Daryl and am completely financially independent. We mostly see each other only on some weekends because we live over an hour away from each other and also due to the constraints of my being a single mom. Daryl and I have taken several trips together and he always comments about how much I’ve exposed him to. He is respectful,…

My ex, “Karen,” and I had a “loose” agreement that we would introduce new significant others to each other before introducing them to our 14-year-old son. However, she did not do that; my son has met Karen’s new boyfriend a few times and now she is having him sleep over. I am not hurt over the fact she has a boyfriend as I somewhat prepared myself for that. What hurts, disappoints, and surprises me is that, first off, I pretty much had to force her to tell me she has a boyfriend and she did not honor our agreement; my son has met him a few times, but I have not even…

I know that good-lookers have extra dating hurdles and even though I am a good-looking woman, I know the ropes. The problem is I want a good-looking man and, at 60, he’s hard to find. Before I married, I had my pick of good lookers and those were the days when guys had to make the first move. I’m learning how to do that myself, but I’ve realized I need to unpack why I want a great-looking guy next to me in bed. I know the anthropological “answer” is that good looks are symmetrical and indicate healthy genes. In natural selection, the best-looking males are coveted. Why should that matter now that…

I’ve been with my husband for 15 years. When we moved in together all those years ago, we kept his bed, not mine. We’ve had a couple of sets of new mattresses through the years and just recently purchased a new headboard. My husband didn’t understand why I wanted a new headboard as he felt nothing was wrong with the old one. I told him it didn’t fit our king size bed frame and I wanted a nicer headboard. He didn’t agree, but he caved. The headboard came, it sat in our garage for a few days, and I finally asked when was he putting it together. He said soon and I…

I am trying to follow your Twitter account, but I couldn’t find it; I’m new to Twitter, so I don’t know how to recognize which is yours. Here’s my deal: My on-off boyfriend ended our relationship three years ago. we had started dating as high school sweethearts, and then dated again in our twenties and again in our early thirties. I’m now 39 years old, single and ready to mingle. I was seeing this guy 10 years younger than I; we had fun and he helped boost my self-confidence, but I didn’t have strong feelings for him. We ended things about a month ago and he’s tried contacting me a couple times,…