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When we first met, my girlfriend was a hard-working lady, searching for her dream teaching job. She was educated, active, and happy. You’d never know she was diagnosed with depression. We’d go out on dates nearly every time I visited, and she even got me into following hockey by taking me to a game (previously I wasn’t into sports at all). If we didn’t go out, she was into playing video games together. It was a wonderful time. But now, things are quite different. To begin with, she’s put on quite a bit of weight. Now, she was already fat. Not chubby — she was genuinely a fat girl. And that was…

I got together with a boy, “Mike,” when I was 14 and he was 15. He was amazing at the start, but we were very young. After a few months I caught him cheating on me (five times) and he became very emotionally abusive after the first three to four months. This toxic relationship went on for about three years, on and off. No matter what we did, we couldn’t seem to let go of each other. He had only ever physically hurt me once by pushing me over into a washing machine. (He instantly apologized after realizing what he had done.) A friend caught the incident on tape and that made…

When I was 21, I met a man and entered a long-distance relationship in secret as my parents, who are super religious, wouldn’t approve. Then I got an apartment with him, moved all my stuff to that apartment two and a half hours away and introduced him to my parents with a: “Sooo, this is a guy I’ve been dating for six months…and, by the way, I’m moving in with him.” We eventually got married and had a kid, and then he left me for someone else (the whole relationship was five years in duration). When he left, I moved back in with my parents — we had repaired and rebuilt a…

I’ve written you once before, but I am now writing you with a question I think a lot of younger people are struggling with right now: How do I reconcile my love for my dad with the fact that he voted for Trump? I am a woman, and I feel so betrayed that he voted for someone who clearly sees me as “less than” — someone who thinks women are there to grab and touch and lord over without consequences. It feels like, on some level, he has to be able to accept that behavior to have voted for him. It’s a betrayal to me, to my non-white boyfriend whose parents are…

I just had an abortion and my boyfriend didn’t come with me. I begged him to come, and he said he would be there, but he didn’t show up. He chose to hang out with his friends instead of coming and supporting me. When I first found out I was pregnant, he expressed very deeply that he wasn’t ready to be the father. He also made comments saying he didn’t want me to have his child. He called me three times after the abortion to tell me he cares. When I asked him why he didn’t come, he said he didn’t want to see haunting images of the baby or see me…

I have been with my boyfriend for six years, and for the last year we have lived together. He divorced his ex-wife sixteen years ago after she cheated on him. He helps out his ex a lot, and I understand that. But his two kids are now 19 and 18, and, to this date, I am not allowed to go to any of their events — birthday dinners, graduations, even most football games — although I did go to two games his son played in only because they were out of state and his ex-wife couldn’t make it to either. His children do not want me at their events; they only want…

I have lived with my boyfriend for two and a half years now. We live in a small 1-bedroom/1-bath house with our two dogs…. and, as of May, HIS MOTHER! Originally, I was told that this wasn’t a permanent situation — that she just needed a place to stay for a couple months, but we are now approaching the sixth month and she hasn’t even started looking for her own place. Such a small house as ours lacks privacy and she also has two dogs. We converted the living room into her bedroom, so the front door opens right into her room. She has a lot of stuff as well; we can’t…

It’s time again for Shortcuts. For every question, I’ll give my advice in just a few sentences because sometimes the answer to a person’s question is so obvious and the need to hear it so great that being as clear and frank as possible is simply the best way to go. My husband and I have been married for eight years, together eleven, and we have a toddler. He works full time in law enforcement, and I am a stay-at-home mom working part-time as a lawyer. If it’s of any consequence here, though it’s not to me, I make almost as much as he does by working ten hours a week. I…

I turned 31 yesterday and am in a new relationship that is one month old. I have been single for a year and have learned to enjoy being alone. I have also been particular in my selection of guys because I want someone who is ready to love me and not play games. So I met this new guy, but he does not have enough time for me. In the month we’ve been dating, I have only seen him three times even though he doesn’t live far from me. I have communicated my expectations of a relationship with him and he agreed that we should make more time for each other. This…