I’m always amused by the different questions people type into their Google browser to end up at my site, so much so that I created a feature in which I address some of those very questions. After the jump, check out what’s on the minds of inquiring people this month.
1. How do I know if someone is flirting with me in words with friends?
All the words they spell end in “Y.”
2. How can I change my voice to sound like a rich guy?
Watch old episodes of “Regis and Kelly.” Listen closely to how Kelly talks.
3. Should I stop sleeping with him if he won’t marry me?
4. Is there a nice way to tell someone that you’re not attracted to them?
No, there is not. Better to say you aren’t interested and leave it at that.
5. What is your comfort food?
Ice cream, sea salt and caramel chocolate, mashed potatoes, chili, french fries, mac-n-cheese, beer.
6. How do celebrities deal with heartbreak?
They buy a new nose, purchase an 18 million dollar house, and adopt a baby from Africa.
7. How come he doesn’t want to title our relationship?
Because it isn’t a book.
8. Am I jerk-off worthy?
9. Is roller derby for me?
Do you like punny names, big bruises, and women who like to roar?
10. Why are my boyfriend’s balls wrinkly?
Too much time in the bath.