No need to apologize. Keep your head up. Work thru the tough spots hard and you will be good.

We all agree ktfran is fine. Jj did too. The (valid) point is that if stuff *your boyfriend does* upsets you (not work stress or you lost a softball game), and you find that you react by lashing out and breaking down, and this starts happening multiple times, you have a problem on your hands. Again, it’s been said repeatedly here that she’s not at that point yet. But it’s always best to just calmly say how you feel rather than reacting emotionally if, say, you feel uncomfortable about something your newish boyfriend is doing. Again, she’s FINE.

I actually agree with both JimmyJam and Veritek here. Definitely, it’s important to be yourself, even — especially — in the first six months. But I think if being yourself at this time means having regular meltdowns (and that’s not what ktfran is doing, but Veritek, it sounds like maybe that’s how you were behaving with what’s his face? Tinder Teacher?), then it’s reasonable that someone who is just getting to know you and figuring out if you are relationship material might think that you’ve either got too much drama going on right now to be truly be open to pursuing a relationship or YOU are just too much drama for him. That’s fair. If I’d been on a handful of dates with someone and he was melting down about various things, I’d be inclined to step back and really consider whether this was a good time to pursue this person. I might think he was overall a good match but this was bad timing, or I might just be turned off by the hysterics. When someone has only a small window into who you are simply because there hasn’t been enough time and history to see a bigger picture, and what he’s seeing so far is a lot of crying, then it’s reasonable that he might assume that a bigger picture includes more crying.

It’s hard, when life affects who we are and how we behave at any given period of time to give a full, honest impression of our entire selves. But that’s what dating is — trying to give a full, honest view of yourself… trying to make the small picture reflect the bigger picture (or at least be enticing enough so pursuer continues opening the window a little wider to get a bigger view). This is why, when people are going through challenging or traumatic periods, it might be a good idea to put the pursuit of a relationship on hold, until you’re better able to give an accurate picture of yourself in small bursts of time.

Yeah I would have to agree with Wendy and Skyblossom. There’s a difference between normal, early relationship issues (like what ktfran described) and full on meltdowns very early in dating. I definitely think Wendy’s advice about perhaps putting dating or potential new relationships on hold until periods of stress are over is sound. I will admit there were times in my dating life that I could have benefited from it. I think at times like those, we might be looking for someone to fix us or hold us up…that’s what family and good friends are for…not a new guy.