DW Community Catch-up Thread
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I’m sorry so many stressful things are going on at once, Varitek. All of the uber drivers I’ve talked to seem to really enjoy it, but I have no idea how much it pays. I could never do it. Driving gives me so much anxiety.
If I was in your situation, I’d probably mentally tell myself “this isn’t going to work” and not reply to their most recent text. I tend to do this a lot at early stages because having a conversation after a couple of dates makes me feel too vulnerable. Of course I always think “well if they continue to contact me and attempt to schedule definite plans, then I’ll give this another chance”. Except I’ve never had that happen.
Honestly you sound just as busy as him – you balance multiple jobs, family, working out, etc, so it’s hard for me as an outsider to comprehend how he is too busy to set aside one or two hours in a week to grab a drink or bite to eat or something. I don’t remember if you said what his job is, but if this is indicative of his work/life balance, would the relationship be sustainable in the long run?
Sorry that’s way longer than intended. I was feeling anxious today, so I’ve been smoking and eating Peeps Smores since I got off work.
Kare is right. Sometimes pot makes things clear 🙂
You shouldn’t be feeling so anxious about things with a guy you’ve been on 2 dates with. It seems like mentally you have already put more stock into this than two dates warrants. I’m sorry you’re feeling this way, and I get that when you meet someone you feel potential with its easy to get wrapped up in what it could be. But this isn’t good for your mental health – especially given all you have going on. I hope you take what we’re saying to heart and think about ways you can slow down and take things one date at a time.
I agree with both of you. I shouldn’t be this anxious. And it’s not all about him, like I mentioned I got a lot going on right now. I would just like to have a conversation with him in order to tell him why I want to take a step back. I know I don’t owe him that after two dates I just for some reason feel like I should. And I think it would make me feel better to say “hey I really like you, I’d love to go on more dates, but maybe we should wait until you are done with your work event and if we are both still interested let’s do it.”
@kare he works for a power plant and they are doing a long term maintenance thing that they do about once every 18 months. Right now I believe he’s averaging between 12 and 15 hour days. So he probably is too tired to go on a date by the time he gets home. But that also means he probably can’t be dating right now.
Just an update, new guy got in contact with me this weekend and apologized for being so unavailable and asked me out for Wednesday. I agreed because I’m free and that’s his day off and I’d really like to see him. So for now, one day/date at a time. I have one active dating profile right now but I’m not working it too much or too hard. I’ve got a much needed vacation coming up and work is getting crazy so I might need to take another dating break for a bit just to get caught up on life in general 🙂
Hope everyone had a nice weekend. My parents are visiting which is stressful, but they let me sleep in till 10:30 yesterday morning (i’m typically up by 7 at the latest, apparently I was tired) and they had already made toast and coffee, so there was a plus to having them here!
I think agreeing to a definite plan is totally fine. Now if he said “maybe let’s do something on Wednesday if you’re free, and nothing comes up for work”, then I wouldn’t get your hopes up. Being free for a date and going out again is fine, but putting your plans on hold or feeling on call all the time is not. Or it is for some people – everyone can live their life however they want.
I went out on Friday with my former coworker that might be moving back to my city. He’s an awesome friend/like a brother to me, so he’s always fun to hang out with.
Saturday I went to a party with my FWB, and it was kind of dull. I don’t know any of this set of friends, and everyone spent the night talking about other people I’ve never met and how horrible and selfish people in their 20s are since they don’t work or pay for anything. I told my FWB maybe he shouldn’t fuck a 25 year old if he has such an issue with millenials. I mean I obviously have a job and bills and all that jazz just like he does.
I love that every generation bitches about the new. I’ve actually read quite the opposite about millennials.
*shakes fist* damn kids!
I agree – I’m pretty sure my grandparents thought my parents’ generation was doomed, they thought Gen X was doomed, Gen X thinks Gen Y is doomed, etc.
I just think it’s terrible to make generalized comments about any group – similar to what I was saying regarding religion last week. Sure, some people within certain groups behave a certain way, but that doesn’t mean the whole group should be vilified. And obviously, if your FWB is spending as much time with you as he is (I still think of you two as dating 🙂 ), he should know better than to make or perpetuate comments like that.
Exactly. I was kind of annoyed I turned down a hot tub party with my coworker and his swinger friends to be the outsider at this party, but oh well. I’m sure there will be more hot tub parties in the future. Plus I made plans with my FWB first, and it would have been rude to cancel.
@veritek33 Just popping in to say that I hope you have an awesome date tonight! You deserve to have some fun right about now.
