DW Community Catch-up Thread

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  • MissDre
    November 23, 2016 at 1:13 pm #660388

    @Kate 5 dates, no sex

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    November 23, 2016 at 1:15 pm #660389

    Well that’s not really enough for him to be able to say anything definitive about future plans, right? So maybe keep getting to know him?

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    November 23, 2016 at 1:17 pm #660390

    But… it does sound likely he’ll have to move far away, might not get the choice to stay, and you wouldn’t move, would you?

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    MissDre
    November 23, 2016 at 1:19 pm #660391

    I do want to keep getting to know him, very much so, but I’m just afraid of wasting my time or getting hurt. Which is a risk with anyone you date, but feels like a greater risk in this case. Basically I’m just scared.

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    November 23, 2016 at 1:21 pm #660392

    It sounds like a pretty big risk though. Either he’s setting up an Expiration Date now, or he genuinely doesn’t have control over where he gets sent next.

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    MissDre
    November 23, 2016 at 1:28 pm #660394

    He has said that he may not stay with his current company, that’s he’s keeping an eye out for other opportunities – but again, not many jobs in his field in Canada. He asked me about the Universities here and said that he might consider teaching. He mentioned an opportunity that he saw here that he’d likely be suited for. But that doesn’t mean anything at all. I think he just genuinely has no idea where he’ll end up. So yeah, you’re right. It’s a big risk.

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    K
    November 23, 2016 at 1:30 pm #660395

    Oh man, sorry – that is very frustrating, especially after what you went through with the last guy. I don’t really have any advice, unfortunately – it’s hard to know what to do, because you don’t want to cut off something that could possibly work out, but you also don’t want to get hurt again by someone having to move away.

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    lucia_la
    November 27, 2016 at 5:03 pm #661060

    Things are definitely happening between the coworker and I…

    We got drinks on Tuesday night, and then we had a work dinner on Thursday. He and I were the last there and then we ended up back at his place. It was another long, fun night of talking and having fun and getting very little sleep. Then Saturday I invited him to come play board games with some friends, so we did that and then ended up back at his place. We were up late again and then spent the whole day together on Sunday. We spent several hours just lying in bed talking, laughing, getting to know each other better… also brunch, movies, and of course some.. fun as well. Lots of that, actually 😉

    He’s been texting me a lot and told me he really likes me. I’m trying to just be chill and see what happens and not overthink things. Easier said than done, but right now I’m just really enjoying spending time with him.

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    November 28, 2016 at 12:30 pm #661232

    @MissDre – maybe start dating other men if you choose to continue to get to know this guy? It doesn’t sound like you’re exclusive, so it may be better to open up your options rather than putting all of your hopes onto one person whose longer-term future seems so tentative. If it were me, I think I’d cut and run now. Even if you’re still dating in a couple months, that’d still be really early in a relationship to make big life/career decisions over another person. :-/

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    November 28, 2016 at 2:09 pm #661273

    I’m sorry MissDre, that does seem like some pretty crappy luck.

    I’ll try to cheer you up with a story. I took break from dating for a while during unemployment and then started dating a guy in September. Well we mutually parted ways last month since it just didn’t seem like a good fit. I’ve dabbled a bit on the dating sites lately and matched with decent looking guy with a decent looking job, etc. We text a little bit, noting too remarkable, just getting to know one another. Wednesday night, the night before Thanksgiving, he gets wasted and calls me and leaves three voice mails and 17 text messages – all while I’m asleep. Telling me how good of a match he thinks we are, how beautiful I am, etc. I NEVER EVEN MET THE GUY.We were supposed to meet Saturday. So I didn’t respond to the calls or texts. So then he sends more texts apologizing. And on Friday he finally gave up.

    So there’s your crazy red flag story for the day. 🙂

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    November 28, 2016 at 2:29 pm #661283

    @veritek – Yikes! That’s fairly nutso! Only once have I ever had a guy drunk-text me prior to our first date (that I am aware of), and it was a huge turn-off for me because I found it obnoxious. And my situation wasn’t even that bad.

    I was supposed to see the British guy I’ve been dating yesterday for the first time in a couple weeks, but we’re both under the weather and ended up canceling. And now I won’t see him until January due to work and holiday travel schedules. Bah. It’s moving really slowly and although I haven’t met anyone else yet, I recently started using apps again just to keep my options open.

    Also – tiny crush on a married co-worker. Which is, for me, just kinda fun. It’s nice being around men who I appreciate, who I think are good and kind, because it’s a pleasant reminder that men like him exist!

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    kare
    November 28, 2016 at 3:43 pm #661302

    I went on an actual date with my coworker. I thought we had defined ourselves as just a sex thing, so I’m not sure why he wanted to go on a date for the first time after 3 years of hooking up. It was fun, but he’s a bit immature so who knows what will happen.

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DW Community Catch-up Thread

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