DW Community Catch-up Thread
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@Copa, good call. If you see him again next time and talk more, then messaging him probably won’t seem as weird. I’ve been asked out twice via Meetup messages after only meeting each guy on a hike once. Of course, I probably have a different perspective because both times I wasn’t interested in the guy.
Well, I don’t even know that I’d ask someone out if I DID message them. Like, I’d probably just say it was nice meeting them and trying to start a normal conversation, the same as I would if I thought I met a woman who could be a new friend. I’ve had women do this to me after meeting me once trying to take the friendships off of MeetUp, and haven’t thought anything of it. It’s how I’ve set up some “friend dates.” If a man I met and got along with at an event did this, I actually don’t know if my initial thought would be that he’s looking to DATE me. In any case, I don’t think I talked to this guy enough to warrant any follow-up.
I have been asked out by total strangers on that site, and THAT is where I think it starts getting weird, because it’s not an online dating service. A former friend of mine met her fiance through a running MeetUp, but over the course of several months they met in personal at group events before forming any kind of independent friendship.
Then again, I know a couple that met through LinkedIn and a former co-worker of mine met his wife on Twitter, so I suppose some people truly do use all kinds of social sites to meet.
I met my boyfriend through my hiking Meetup group, but we had gone on several hikes together before he asked me out, and he asked for my number before doing so. There are lots of couples that have met through our group, but usually it’s not “oh they went on one hike and he sent her a message asking her out!” The dating messages from random people are definitely weird and some people in our group have encountered those.
A coworker of mine met his wife on MySpace!
Yeah, I’ve been looking for a running MeetUp near me just to meet some new people with a shared interest. For living in a city full of runners, there’s surprisingly nothing in my immediate neighborhood. I’m okay going a little out of my way, though, so I’ll likely just pick the group based around how their running schedule coincides with the programming at my gym (I hate when they make us do yoga-style workouts, haha).
I’d LOVE to be involved with my city’s hiking MeetUp group, but I don’t have a car and their events are always in the surrounding suburbs.
I really realized when I changed jobs a few weeks ago just how much my life revolved around work this last year. My work/life balance has been restored and it made me realize how much of myself I forgot about at that job because I was always working or worrying about not working enough, and not paying nearly enough attention to myself.
A running meetup sounds great, and very motiviating. Check out the hiking meetup to see if people offer rides from the city, or if there is a train option to get you near the event. We will sometimes pick people up from our local train station, and they come in from the city. Also, sometimes people drive up from the city and offer rides to people. We’re organizers and on almost every hike we post, people are asking for rides from the city. Unfortunately 75% of the time they don’t get one, but sometimes they do!
The first date is tonight and I hate to say it but I’m not really looking forward to it as much anymore. I’m not going to flake obviously but darn. Maybe I shouldn’t have set this up so early.
I think after this date I need to work on my fitness. I could stand losing 15 pounds (25 to be legit thin). I watched this random video https://youtu.be/eraMAMOwkAs and it kind of inspired me–I’m not fat but I am what you’d say is “fluffy”. The last time I was measured I had 30% body fat. I’ve never lost serious weight but I’ve been down 10 pounds and did feel differently.
Partly because of texting habits. But if I am really going to be honest, and this warrants flack, it’s partly his job. I don’t want to be too specific. It’s not in trades; it’s an admin position, I guess you could say. And, I don’t know what that means, in any sense. And is this a forever job? And? I know it’s crappy “judging” this about a person, when probably even having a job is a good quality these days. So I want to meet him, because he seems nice and cute enough otherwise. I’m not going to self-sabotage or anything, but yeah, I guess that is my reservation.
He’s 25! And yeah, this is one reason texting before meeting is a bad idea. And first dates on Saturday nights. Just go, have fun, and have “plans later.”
Also, yes, I have to say it is crappy to judge based on that job (the texting habits, sure). I know a bunch of people who started as admins or temps and then climbed the ladder and have good careers.
Yeah, there had to have been a reason I’ve only gone on lunch and coffee dates. Ah well, it’s a nice bar with good beer selection so it’ll be fine. And thank you, I needed to hear that. It’s not comfortable realizing I do have these kinds of prejudices or opinions.
If it helps at all, some of my best first dates were with guys that I really wanted to bail on leading up to the date, but forced myself to go. (Low expectations are good, as long as you can still keep an open mind!)
