I should have noted, you only have to do those events if you want to. We didn’t have engagement photos because I personally have no use for them. I know others feel differently. I didn’t have a bridal shower, but I did have a bachelorette. AND IT WAS FUN! We went to cocktail classes at a fancy schmancy speakeasy. The husband didn’t have a bachelor party. We didn’t have an engagement party. We didn’t even have a typical, traditional wedding!

Anyway, my point is, you can do as little or as much as you and your fiance want!

I lmao at engagement photos!

I think a lot of the pre-wedding traditions are silly, and to me they often seem showy and gift grab-y. But, yeah, you don’t have to do any of it if it doesn’t appeal to you! If I ever get married, everything will be low-key. I like engagement photos if they’re low on the cheeseball factor, but don’t feel like I need them. (I live in a gorgeous city and actually loooove when I see couples out taking their engagement shots, haha.) Like I’ve mentioned, would elope or run down to city hall but would want a nice dress. I’d likely skip the engagement party and bridal shower. I’d consider a bachelorette party. I doubt I’d have a gift registry. In general, I’m low-key, and part of it is that I just wouldn’t want to bother and always feel awkward/shy when I’m the center of attention. But part of it is that it’s unnecessary and not something I put a ton of value on, so why spend the money on it?

Agreed that candids are more fun that posed shots! At one of my law school friend’s weddings, the absolute sweetest picture of her and her husband was of the two of them cracking up about who-knows-what. It was the best photo! At another friend’s wedding, when the photographer was packing up and getting ready to leave, she noticed my friend and her now-husband through an upstairs window. They were together on a step and sharing a sweet moment together away from the party. Like, I don’t even recall that they were doing anything special. It was just a great shot of two people enjoying one another’s company.

The photographer I like gives “free engagement” photos. I’ve always personally liked them. The frustration on my end comes more from being half way across the country from family and where we are doing the wedding. So logistic nightmare. FMH wants a small bridal party, he wants the guy who introduced us to be his best man and his son to be a groomsman. So I’m cool with that.
We’re doing a house warming party Saturday and someone dubbed it an engagement party. No, it’s not that.

Our photographer explained that engagement shots can be good if you’re awkward in front of a camera as they help you relax and give the photographer an opportunity to figure you out before the more important wedding shoot. We still didn’t get them but I can see the benefit and most photographers where we lived offered them as part of the wedding package.