Two dates in one weekend! Go @Ale! 🙂 A bar with activities is good — it helps make the date a little more active and if the conversation drags, at least you’ll have something to talk about. Hopefully neither date will leave you crying into your ice cream.

Any of the fellow crossfit people watching the games today?

So our grilling date didn’t happen! On Monday he texted that he had to take a work call on Tuesday evening, asked if I could reschedule for tonight (Wednesday). I couldn’t, I have dinner plans with a friend tonight, so instead we decided we’d keep last night low key and explore a neighborhood in the city and eat ice cream or grab a drink. His call was cancelled yesterday afternoon, so we figured we could meet earlier after all. Then it started raining yesterday as I was leaving work. So we ended up going to see the Mr. Rogers documentary. After the movie we walked around my neighborhood for a bit, and then grabbed my dog and walked him. My dog loves men and threw himself at Bumble Guy. It’s silly, but I really had a lot of fun walking with him. He got his hair cut and trimmed his beard and it looked so good. 🙂 So he leaves for a vacation tomorrow and is back middle of next week, and we’re planning to do our dinner date when he’s back and hopefully trying paddle boarding together in two weekends. I will say, it’s really, really nice to meet a guy who actually wants to DO things. I’ve met a lot of guys who don’t seem to want to do a ton (like the ones who quickly start defaulting to Netflix together, or who always default to the same date activity like grabbing drinks). He’s a consultant (though changed roles because he got burned out on the M-Th travel schedule) and is out of town quite a bit for work this month. I don’t know why, but I’ve dated more than my fair share of consultants since moving to this city. Which is fine, but in the past I’ve had a hard time maintaining a good connection/momentum because of the travel. So we’ll see. But for now, still fun.

Also, I know we’ve discussed who pays for dates early on in this thread. What about when you’re dating? I paid for last night’s date — it’s the first one I paid for and it actually felt really important to me to get to the theater first so I could be the one to grab our tickets, snacks, and drinks. Because I don’t want him to feel like he always has to pay. Obviously we’re not exclusive, but I guess I feel like we’re both happy to see where it goes in the short term (famous last words?), and am curious how people split the bills when you’re past the first few dates.

@LadyE There are duds and great guys on all the apps/sites! I’ve met more nice non-matches than anything else, but there have been a handful of guys I would’ve committed to over the past couple of years who things just didn’t work out with. It’s possible that guy changed his mind but never bothered to update his profile (couldn’t tell you the last time I updated mine because I don’t keep track of that) and it’s probably not worth your while to call people out on that other than saying you’re looking for different things.

@TheHizzy I’ve never watched games before.

After the first couple of dates, we took turns. He usually ended up paying more, but he also makes quite a bit more than me. I always try/tried to pay my fair share though.

@Copa… don’t overanalyze or compare the amount of time spent with Bumble vs. previous guys. It’s a really good sign that he’s continually making dates despite his work travels. Just take it day by day and see where it goes!

@Copa I actually disagree that it’s not worth my while to call them out – I mean, he’s obviously an asshole but I swiped right and talked to him BECAUSE he said he was looking for a LTR. If he’d said he just wanted casual I wouldn’t have done that. He wasted my time. I mean, it was only a minute but it still wasted my time because I had a ton of matches to weed through and I picked him to talk to in part because of that criteria. It’s not being honest and I’m sick of it. Plus I’m sick of 40 year old men acting like assholes. It’s just not cool anymore; you’re middle-aged, dude. Grow the hell up. Saying “fuck you” to a woman on a dating app when she did nothing to merit it is really immature.

It sounds like Bumble guy is great and it’s so nice to hear a positive story! Please keep updating us because it gives me hope. And I know what you mean about guys actually wanting to do things on dates, and even more so taking the initiative to think of those things – that’s really important to me, too, and an indicator of our compatibility.

@Ale, I liked him but I’m not super twitterpated yet…I think because he wanted to go really fast physically and I wasn’t feeling it. I felt pressured. He (eventually) listened when I said a firm no, and apologized later for pushing things too far, but I didn’t love that (he definitely didn’t listen to “no” right away). So we’ll see. He says he “isn’t in a rush” and is fine to wait, but we’ve only been out once and he just asked me to come back to his apartment after the show Friday. I said I would rather stay out in public. So we’ll see…now I see why he has 3 kids, lol. He did show me a very good time, though, and paid for everything (refused to let me pay at all) so that was nice. I thanked him several times!