DW Community Catch-up Thread
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So glad your dog is doing better and wishing him continued recovery! It’s so amazing that BG has been supportive too.
I’ve felt the same about accepting help. I mentioned how my boyfriend has been able to stay over at my place more (just one or two nights a week) during the work week during his weeks “off”. He makes me tea and coffee while I get ready and it’s sweet. I do feel bad I can’t “host” him in the morning but it is helpful even just the little things.
This is a double post but I now know personally of a divorce among my friends/acquaintances. It is a bit of shock and quite sad. They are 31. Met in university. Married for about four years so they didn’t get married overly young, but relatively young compared to our circle. No kids. It’s amicable but wow, it seems stressful.
Yeah, I have a handful of friends who are about my age (early 30s) and divorcing or recently divorced. If I’m being honest, I’m not surprised by any divorces so far. With one friend in particular I’m actually surprised she and her soon-to-be ex-husband kept it together as long as they did. She’s not handling it well, though, so it’s very sad. She keeps saying she doesn’t understand how they can go from being “so committed” to divorced just like that even though they were separated and on opposite ends of the globe for more than half of their five-year marriage, and that wasn’t even their first separation.
I only have one divorced friend, and we saw it coming from a mile away, it only took longer than I thought. I don’t know any more, but I think it’s because most people I know who are married have only gotten married in the last 2-3 years, and most of my friends aren’t married. There’s one other friend where I wouldn’t be one bit surprised if she got divorced, I’m just hoping it happens before they have any kids…
I have two close friends going through separations and divorces right now. 1 is in her early 40s and it’s her third marriage and we all suggested to her two years ago when they got engaged that maybe this wasn’t a good idea but she went ahead with it. (They’ve been together for 8 years and he finally proposed but lots of issues and basically only having sex once a year.) Surprise, she got tired of the lack of physical touch and intimacy and filed for divorce 18 months after their wedding. It sucks because I love them both but they are a bad match.
My other friend is my age, mid 30s and has been married 10 years. She still loves him and they have two kids together but he’s so attached to his father that he makes major decisions about family assets with dad and not with her. And he has been for the last ten years and she’s finally found her breaking point. This one makes me the saddest because they truly love each other but he’s so controlled by his father that I don’t think he truly comprehends that he’s going to lose her over this.
I remember that friend of yours Copa, I’m shocked she’s not shocked to be honest if what you’ve said about her in the past is true. They barely had a marriage to leave!
The only divorce I was kind of shocked by was my BIL only because it was so soon after the wedding. Looking back all the signs were there but we thought they had at least several years and a kid in them. I guess when the bride spends her whole reception outside smoking with her friends it’s a decent sign things aren’t off to a rosy start.
I’ve been mentioning her on this site for years as a cautionary tale for all kinds of situations: It’s better to date longer when you’re young, calling off a wedding is cheaper than divorce, don’t assume marriage will fix your problems, don’t rely solely on your partner to meet all your needs, don’t force the fit, listen to your gut, and on and on. She’s like eight LWs in one! I had a gut feeling even before they got engaged that they were going to end up miserably married and eventually divorced. I think it’s going to take her a very long time to heal and move on. As hard as it felt sometimes to be single when I didn’t want to be, she always made me glad I didn’t marry any of the guys I dated in my 20s.
This is so weird you guys, but I had a Tinder match less than two years ago track me down in my former gym. He didn’t even know me but found my former gym, took a class and sent me a picture of my ex doing the same class. I thought that was super creepy and stopped talking to him and never went out on a date.
Turns out he started talking to me again about three weeks ago, but I didn’t know it was him. I never answered his texts, but never blocked him either. I found out today who he was when he texted me a photo of a plane ticket he just bought. WE ARE FLYING ON THE SAME PLAN ON FRIDAY. I don’t know if or how he knows. We have the same flight. Christ.
How did a Tinder match know who your ex is? How have you been talking to someone whose identity you do not know? I’m not sure I understand all the details, but he sounds super weird and I’m sorry you’re dealing with him.
