DW Community Catch-up Thread
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My boyfriend’s parents were young parents/grandparents. They were HS sweethearts and married at 18, started having kids at 19. His mom said they were so young that everyone assumed they got married because she was pregnant. Then his sister also married younger (24) and had kids not long after. His parents would’ve been in their 40s when they became first-time grandparents. I know things have changed but I can tell my boyfriend’s mom thinks it’s WILD that my parents were in their 30s having kids in the mid/late 80s.
Earlier this year, we hired someone at work who drives me nuts. I recently found out she’s 24. We’ve had to go down to our HQ for off-site training a few times this year. The first time we went, they reminded us of the business casual dress code multiple times. On our travel day, we were heading straight to our HQ offices for the afternoon, and she wore yoga pants (“flare leggings”) and a hoodie, both of which were covered in pet hair. She wore the exact same thing the next day to our training. And at the staff social the first night, she was surprised to learn ordering a drink-drink is okay, then had like four mimosas on an empty stomach (she said she was “scared” to go to the buffet and I offered to go up with her). So I’m pretty sure she ended up drunk cause at one point she was holding a piece of broccoli in her hand that she’d grabbed from the buffet and was laughing? It was weird. The second time we went for off-site training was maybe a week or so after Fourth of July, and she was telling everyone how lit she got on the Fourth. But she at least wore business casual attire the second time… I think her supervisor must’ve said something. I know our executive director, he cares how we present ourselves, and there’s no way he didn’t say something to someone re: attire. I know I made some mistakes when I was newer in office settings, but I find her grating.
Oh dear. That’s sad.
I have noticed some young women, maybe interns, maybe not, wearing extremely short dresses, like probably that’s just what they own / are used to wearing and they don’t realize. I think for the guys it’s easier and if they don’t have a lot of work clothes they can wear the same outfits on repeat.
She was a paralegal before we hired her, so it’s surprising. I suppose maybe some of that is graduating into the pandemic and then entering the workforce remote or hybrid. Maybe? IDK. I could see this being her steep learning curve moment if she wasn’t going into an office or doing so sparingly before we hired her.
At my last company, my department’s median age was something like 29, so there were a lot of young women pretty fresh out of school who wore short skirts with over-the-knee boots to the office because those were a big trend at the time.
I never showed up to work looking like I was running errands or going to da clerb in my 20s, but I do know sometimes my outfits weren’t quite right or my hair was too done.
I am pretty sure I dressed the opposite —- think frumpy —- when I was an intern in college haha. But once on a casual Friday I wore a graphic tshirt and jeans and I definitely got a look.
My sister pointed out the milestone where the interns are closer in age to your kids than you are. I think I am 10 years older than our student. He brought up a high school extracurricular a certain year and I was like we definitely had no overlap.
Years ago the documented dress code for men was slacks, button down dress shirt (chinos & a chambray shirt were totally fine) and included wearing a t-shirt under one’s dress shirt. I’ll never forget when a young man showed up with a clearly visible “1 tequila, 2 tequila, 3 tequila floor” tshirt under his dress shirt. The manager pulled him to the side, explained that he was expected to go back to his hotel or target and get himself a plain white t shirt, and that whatever time was needed to correct this issue was not to be put against the project and he was expected to stay later that day to make up for lost time being a schmuck.
This was also a point in time when if a young man showed up to work unshaved everyone asked him if he was ok or just being lazy. Good times.
To be fair, for women the rules were pretty simple, no one wants to see your underarms or toes. Nothing sleeveless without a jacket or sweater. No sandals. If your skirt didn’t create a barrier between 95% of your butt/thighs and the office chair, your skirt was too short.
I’m not yet old enough to be the age of my coworkers’ parents, but old enough to notice when someone is still learning work norms and age/generational differences in the office.
The same work trip where my coworker wore her yoga clothes, a different coworker (recently promoted from behind-the-scenes admin work to an outward-facing role, but has been with us for something like 15 years… I think she’s in her 40s if not 50s) chose to wear a t-shirt that read “QUEEN: Only a queen can attract a king” on our travel day. For both women, I’d have noticed their attire but maybe not thought much of it if we’d been going straight to the hotel on arrival, but we went straight to our HQ. Even with strictly social events that are casual, I still put some thought into what I’m wearing and will try to opt into something more elevated. Our official dress code is business casual at a minimum, but particularly at the director level (at the highest level, this is all men still), the expectation is shirt and tie for day-to-day. I try to take note of what our one woman mid-level director wears whenever I see her in person. She’s in her 50s and always looks great.
On which note, I’m in the market for a new blazer or two if anyone has any recs.
I’m old enough now (almost 47) that many of my former high school and college classmates have kids in high school and college themselves (I’ll have a high schooler too in two years, omg) and I am always clutching my pearls at how the girls (not to be sexist, but it’s always the girls) are dressed for formal occasions. The dresses are SO short and SO tight. Were we dressing like this in the 90s? I don’t think so. I can’t imagine Joanie, who is only 8 still, dressing that way in a few years but who knows. Kids can surprise you!
Related to the topic of kids growing up so quickly: Jackson, who will be starting 7th grade in a few weeks (!), got back from his first sleep-away camp over the weekend. He was gone for two weeks and he had so much fun and said it was a great experience. I cannot tell you what a relief this is. I had been worried about this for months, but felt it was an important step in his development and since he was open to it, I really wanted him to go. But, man, I was really nervous leading up to it and the first few days he was away. But he did great and he’s open to going again next year. Joanie wants to do one week in two years (the summer she turns 10), which is like the dream.
I thought it would be the case, but now I can say for sure: it gets easier after those baby and toddler and little kid years. I’m so glad to be on the other side of all that.
Unrelated, but want to ask you longtime DW readers: in regards to the site makeover, is there anything you’re missing or would like or need? It’s been a steep learning curve for me learning how this new system works but I’m slowly getting the hang of it and making little tweaks here and there that you may notice (or not). Next week, I have a zoom with the developer who’s been helping me and I’m getting a list together of things I haven’t figured out on my own and hope he can help with. If there’s anything you’re desiring, let me know and I can try to figure it out or I can add to the list to discuss with the developer.
Since the site makeover about a month ago, traffic has almost doubled. I know you can’t tell, but with literally thousands of old posts, there’s a lot of potential to attract readers through google searches, but with an outdated site, that wasn’t happening as much as it could. Now, after several years of declining traffic, it’s been really nice to see things ticking up again. I didn’t know if I would be able to keep the site going but now I think it can last for the foreseeable future. Thank you to all your loyal DWers for sticking around this long. You kept/keep me going.
@copa, Girls of a Certain Age did a blazer post today. She’s a former Lucky editor in chief. She might run a bit older, but I like some of her stuff.
Wendy, the only thing I sort of miss is the “most recent post” on the right hand side of the old blog. I liked that it was for the forum too. I’ve adjusted though and am fine. Congrats on the uptick!!! And I still like the new layout.
My dad was 50 and my mom, 48, when the niece was born. I have young parents who ended up being young grandparents. I hope the same doesn’t happen for my sister. The husband also has young parents. The six of us are actually vacationing together next year. I love that they all get along really well, especially since the husband is an only. We never have to make hard holiday decisions or anything.
Yeah, I agree with you KT. I’ve been working on how to add “recent posts” and recent comments to the sidebar and that was already on my list of things I want to ask the developer for help with. I was able to add “recent forum replies” to the sidebar, so you can see that now on the desktop, and it will be at the bottom of the screen on mobile. Thanks for suggesting!
Speaking of young grandparents, my maternal grandmother, whom I was really close with, was 47 when I was born – the age I turn in a few weeks. eek!
Oh, and now that I’ve said that, I am realizing that the sidebar isn’t visible on the desktop in the forums. Adding that to the list of things to work on!
