DW Community Catch-up Thread
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Dammit. I’ve wanted one of their bags for awhile but I’m a poor substitute teacher now and really need to cut my spending. It was just my birthday and, as always I bought myself everything I wanted over weeks, which ended up being an ashamedly amount of self gifts…not like, handbags but expensive hair and face care, two expensive plants, tchotchkes, etc and then my husband made me a fancy dinner a weekend before…and the actual day of totally sucked.
On my 40th birthday, I was working which was super fun, my ex bff of 35 years (who ghosted me during the pandemic) texted me, and I got super upset because it’s the first I’ve heard from her, even through a mass in my face and facial surgery and so much other shit. And after work I sort of told her exactly how I felt and how hurt I was, but in a calm and measured way. But seriously, could have done without “I never cared about you,” “we have nothing in common,” etc etc from a person who literally a few months before this wrote a letter to me extolling what a great friend I was. Ugh.
My dad is still choosing to pretend he is a child free man, so my adult brother and I are still just hurt and it feels a little bit like suffering, in a way. It really sucks. He’s there choosing not to be apart of my life, his, my kids. My birthday is just another big reminder that my dad doesn’t talk to me.
I have had a few midlife epiphanies since last Monday, so here’s hoping this is the year of breakthroughs and not giving a shit, which also giving a shit?
Good news is I do think I am going to go back to school, even if it’s very very part time to get my teaching certificate so I can teach at the performing arts school I sub at, and I am making new friends despite the shit that’s gone on with losing friends. That’s my dating update.
Anyone? Tell me about your life.
We had some home expenses come up that have been a lot and I’m also cutting back on spending and not buying bags! I’m going on a trip with my mom and sister and I’m excited for it but my finances are currently a point of stress. Just sharing the sale cause it’s a good one and the L&S bags I’ve had have held up very well over the years.
I’m glad you were able to treat yourself a bit, @Anonymousse, but sorry you had a shitty bday day. That’s exciting about school and making some new friends, though.
I applied for a job with the state a few weeks ago. Today I got the strangest email to date in response to any application I’ve ever sent. It was an email letting me know I meet or exceed the minimum criteria for the role and I was given a numerical score on my application. The email went on to explain that the number I got is the equivalent of getting an A under their old applicant grading system. But that’s it so far. No interview request. The email invites applicants an to appeal their score/grade if they feel it’s not a reflection or their true fit for the role. Which seems odd. They don’t explain why or how you got your score, so I don’t know how anyone can appeal. We’ll see what happens. If I’m never invited to interview… at least I got an A?
That is weird Copa – what do they hope to achieve with that crap?
Anon – I’m sorry you had such a shitty birthday. When I was about the same age I had an artist draw me a picture of a step stool because decided that it was time to “get over” my shit. While I still have the picture, I have not really gotten over my shit.
I too had a birthday recently, my mom convinced my sister, BIL and nephew to come for a visit as the kiddo and I share a birthday. I’m trying to ensure my nephew has a good cultural foundation so he slept over and we watched Clue. I don’t think he got all the jokes but it’s a start. I think I may have crumbled his world a little; he’s big into equality and social justice etc. and I asked him what music he likes and he started reading off his spotify list and I said that I wasn’t judging his choice in music, but it was odd that 95% of his favorite music were white men and that he may want to branch out a little. I sent him some suggestions like Ben Harper to help him out. He likes what I call “Earnest Young Man” music. Any suggestions are appreciated.
It seems like the kind of information that might be shared internally amongst decision makers at some orgs, but not made public to the candidate themselves? IDK, I’ve never applied for a government job before. I assumed the process would be slow and the role filled internally… I was not expecting a grade, haha. I’d also gotten to the point where I’d kinda forgotten I’d even applied — my favorite place to be! — and now it’s top of mind again and with the knowledge that I’m actually a strong-ish candidate.
Maybe it automates some of the winnowing – especially since it’s a slow process. I’m curious what message others got: You didn’t meet the minimum criteria and you will not be moving forward. Have a nice day, GFY.
I know we’ve discussed the importance of retinol products in one’s skin care regimen. Does anyone use prescription retinol? The medication I’ve been taking for the alopecia clinical trial I’m in made me break out a bit over the summer, an issue I’ve bene lucky to never really have to deal with. I got a Rx for retinol and have been using it for a month now. The break-out cleared up immediately and I was told within three months I would also notice more even skin tone, smaller pores, and a reduction in fine lines. Even after just a month, I can see subtle hints of these things. Rx retinol wasn’t really on my radar, so this has been kind of an unexpected surprise (which helps make up for he alopecia medication not working well for me, I guess).
I do – insurance won’t cover it, but my dermatologist has a compounding pharmacy with whom they work and they sell it at their office. They have three strengths available and I’m at the strongest; that plus a topical antibiotic + benzoyl peroxide (also by the compounding pharmacy) seems to be keeping my perimenopausal outbreaks relatively under control.
I do, too. Not for acne, but to help with melasma. It helps and I’ve also noticed my skin looks brighter and fresher overall, not just on the darker spots.
I use a retrinal (not rx), which I understand to be somewhere between a retinol and tretinoin. I use it probably every other night and my skin always looks more even in the morning.
In the past few months I’ve decided to change up my skincare routine a bit with the hopes of evening out of skin tone over time. I think it’s working. I added a glycolic acid serum to exfoliate a couple times/week. I was also curious about the new-ish skincare brand of the dermatologist I always cite on here, Dr. Shereene. I bought two of her PillowtalkDerm products. One is a depuffer that has a roller built in to apply the serum. I really like it for mornings I wake up looking puffy and am looking forward to seeing how it does on my upcoming vacation. I feel like my face always gets enormous on vacation. The other is a serum intended to fade dark spots and brighten the skin. It has a nice texture and I bring it up because it’s supposed to work well for melasma!
I have melanoma too – haven’t been diagnosed but I have the appearance of it – so I am hoping the retinol helps with that as well. I hadn’t considered getting a prescription for it until the dr in the clinical trial suggested it as a way to combat the breakouts I was having over the summer from the alopecia medicine. Now I’m wondering if it’s the holy grail of skincare and I’m excited to see how my complexion might improve over the coming months.
I just started to incorporate tretinoin into my routine – I use the lowest strength, 0.025%. I went to the dermatologist a month ago and I asked her about a small area of melasma on my chin, and she suggested the tret plus adding zinc sunblock into my routine. I always wear sunblock but I realized that what I use doesn’t have zinc in it! I have fair skin, freckles, and haven’t had many texture or acne issues. In my early 20’s i used Retin-A and it was horrible- my skin flaked off and was red and sensitive. I think the low dose tret seems to be working – no negative side effects and I think the melasma is lightening already! I have also been using it elsewhere on my face, as the doc said it is great for anti-aging. We’ll see!
Yeah, my only experience with a prescribed topical vitamin A was using Retin-A for acne as a teenager and it was bad, my skin got very dry and flaky. With vitamin A derivatives used for “anti-aging” skincare routines, they warn you not to go too hard too soon, especially if you have sensitive skin, so that you don’t blow your face up. I don’t recall ever receiving that warning as a teen being given a similar product for acne!
