BF's Neighborhood – NOT PC

Home / Forums / Advice & Chat / BF's Neighborhood – NOT PC

Viewing 12 posts - 85 through 96 (of 116 total)
  • Author
    Posts
  • Avatar photo
    August 19, 2015 at 12:23 pm #372595

    Well, in all probability the not being street smart thing is the main factor likely to get him in trouble, but combine it with sticking out in a high tension area, that’s really not a great combo. It’s just probably more reason to be street smart as opposed to being the reason in itself.

    Guess she’s frustrated cos he can’t see why she’s worried about his non-streetsmartness, but all you can do is just point out to him that these incidents are going on, and he has to try and be in less of a state of drunken obliviousness to any potential trouble.

    Reply
    Avatar photo
    August 19, 2015 at 12:31 pm #372596

    What Cleo and Paco said.

    If mimosa had started the thread saying she was worried because her BF lives in an area with a lot of shootings, etc etc, I don’t think anybody would have raised an eyebrow.
    BUT she started the thread talking about the minorities in the neighbourhood. The shootings etc came up after we all said she was racist.

    Reply
    lee3
    August 19, 2015 at 12:32 pm #372597

    The NAACP was founded by a group of approximately 60, 7 of whom were black. The word “colored” is no longer a generally accepted term for black. I suppose the name of the organization could be changed to reflect the currently accepted word which is, for the most part, “black.” Except the NAACP is a civil rights organization that advocates for the equal rights of all minorities and to eliminate race prejudice. So I guess we could say colored includes black, brown, yellow, but not white. A lot of terms previously used for various minorities are now regarded as rude. What about generic white people who are not also minorities: cracker? redneck? honkey? sheet? trailer park trash? Anyone here ever used one those terms? As the cowboy said, “Smile when you say that.”

    Reply
    HmC
    August 19, 2015 at 12:45 pm #372598

    Sooo she can’t even say the word colored as an example of an acknowledged racial remark? Give me a break. If one word is just too inflammatory to even utter (or type) in any context at all, I think you are chartering into irrational territory.

    Reply
    Ele4phant
    August 19, 2015 at 12:48 pm #372600

    My argument is that she was using it as an example of one to one with which she experienced. While we can debate whether the comment “white people can’t park right” is prejudiced in intent – it’s undeniable that white people =|= colored people, the latter is way worse than the former.

    Reply
    HmC
    August 19, 2015 at 12:58 pm #372601

    Yeah I was referring to Paco’s statement that Mimosa should not have even said the word because it’s “inflammatory”. I don’t think those two statements are equal, I don’t know if Mimosa does either.

    Reply
    Mim0sa
    August 19, 2015 at 1:18 pm #372605

    No, that’s not the shooting and I do not live in DC. Regardless, it was similar and yes, that is scary. I was pointing out race since it makes me/my BF stand out AND because our race was pointed out to us by other people in the neighborhood. End of story.

    Reply
    Mim0sa
    August 19, 2015 at 1:22 pm #372607

    Just because someone points out race as a factor in something doesn’t mean that person is racist. Quite frankly, I think it’s so sad that we as a society have to censor out everything. How do we expect to progress if our ears remain plugged and our eyes remain shut to the reality of our circumstances? If we stay this way any solution we come up with that is blind to reality and chooses to cushion our ideas to remain “PC” nothing will be solved.

    Reply
    Mim0sa
    August 19, 2015 at 1:24 pm #372608

    If we stay this way any solution we come up with that is blind to reality and chooses to cushion our ideas to remain “PC” nothing will be solved.

    Sorry typo: If we stay this way any solution we come up with that is blind to reality and chooses to cushion political correctness will not truly solve anything.

    Reply
    Ele4phant
    August 19, 2015 at 1:42 pm #372610

    Okay – I want to preface this by saying I am not directly talking to mim0sa, this is a more general comment.

    But people need to get over being called a racist. People react to that almost like they’re being the victim *of* racism. Guess what, this is a racist society, we are all socially conditioned to be racist, to make racist assumptions. We think of racists as being bad people who deliberately hate minorities, but the truth is racism is institutionalized, and we are all guilty of unconsciously doing or thinking things that allow it to perpuate. The key when you get called on it is not to have the knee jerk “no I’m not! I’m a good person!”, but rather entertain the idea that maybe, inadvertently, what you did or said might of been racist.

    And really dig into why it might have been racist, why did I think or say that? Are there some socially conditioned prejudices guiding me to think what I think? Now that I’m thinking critically about it, should I discard those beliefs. My view is, I am racist, I was conditioned by society to think or assume racial bias, but I am also a good person so I try to think critically and change what I think and believe everyday day, all with the goal of becoming less racist.

    I, mean based on this thread alone, I’ve been giving serious thoughts veracityb comments. Am I being racist in denying or minimizing mim0sa’s fears? How important is social power in making one situation problematic (ie someone whey yelling hey black girl) in one context but not another (ie someone black yelling hey white folks)? I mean there have been some really good points made that have really made me think and maybe reframe what I think.

    And if I had just shut down with “No, I’m not being racist! Not going to listen to this!” there’s no room for self reflection, then growth, and then maybe one day, change.

    Reply
    August 19, 2015 at 2:19 pm #372616

    So, I’m not going to go into the race part because there are a lot of nuances I don’t think i can capture. What I want to address is the term PC. In our society today, it’s generally used as a term to trivialize actual concerns. Not saying you are doing this, Mimosa, but many people who refer to political correctness use it as a way to shut down the conversation. “Oh, you think this is sexist? You’re too PC. The end.” It minimizes the feelings, thoughts, and facts of the person by saying “you only care about this because you’re too sensitive,” and ignores that there might actually be some truth behind it.

    It also makes people assume that if someone says something is offensive, that the issue is that they are offended, not that the statement or action might be wrong or hurtful. The implication is that if they weren’t offended, then it would be fine. But things don’t work like that. If you tell someone you hate them and wish they die, it doesn’t become less cruel simply because they don’t really care that you said it and aren’t offended. it’s still a mean thing to say. That’s the case with racist, sexist or other -ist things. But if something is racist, it’s racist whether or not someone is offended. Otherwise, anything said in a KKK meeting without anyone else present would be A-OK. The issue is more that different people have different opinions of what is inappropriate or not, which is why discussions like this are good to have. But I think if our society is not willing to look at words, actions, and systems as being right or wrong, as opposed to putting the whole burden on the person who opposes it, then a lot of stuff will get written off for being “PC.”

    Reply
    Avatar photo
    August 19, 2015 at 2:21 pm #372617

    Phew, thanks @Ele4phant. I was feeling bad about spending all afternoon arguing about this on DW, but I’m glad I’ve at least made one person think harder about what I’m trying to say rather than responding in an almost knee-jerk reaction off the basis of certain words.

    The thing is, race is a rather difficult and emotive subject, and difficult to navigate, but I do feel like the ‘privileged’ classes have been primed to think or feel bad if they even consider anything beyond the standard liberal responses – they’re eager to make up for, and not be labelled as, the (pervasive) all-out haters. I get it, I do, but to refuse to see nuance or admit others’ experiences is not helpful.

    And Mim0sa is not even white, y’all (tho her bf is). She is still a minority among other minorities who are dominant in her bf’s area, and her experiences along with the actual social context going on there have exacerbated her discomfort with her bf’s somewhat careless ways.

    Reply
Viewing 12 posts - 85 through 96 (of 116 total)
Reply To:

BF's Neighborhood – NOT PC

Your information: