Elanie May
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@applescruffs, yeah, and I have a feeling that even if you did it in the nicest way possible: “oh, I didn’t change my name when we got married, I’m actually apple scruffs” people would still read it as bitchy and RAWR and defensive.
I love my last name. It’s great. It has history attached to it, it’s short, easy to spell, and in the middle of the alphabet.
Since I was in college, I’ve known that I want to keep it, or have at least entertained the idea of keeping it. I brought it up at various times with different people, and got some “eh, whatever” reactions and one “that’s kind of a slap in your future husband’s face, isn’t it?” which I find disturbing. Just because it’s culturally a thing, doesn’t mean my choice is meant to reject my husband. Unfortunately, because it’s the default assumption, I think a lot of guys feel that way–like you’re rejecting them or something. Of course when you suggest that they could give up their names–well, of course not! Don’t be ridiculous! I like my name and I’ve had it for years!
Fortunately when it came up with my bf, he was cool with it. He kind of hates hyphenating, so our kids will probably just have his last name and that’s that. Maybe mine as a middle name. I’m okay with that.
I found your regular life blog back when I was reading a lot of blogs about single life and love and you were in Chicago. I was also reading Sarah Brown and Pretty Crabby and a bunch of others at the time. I followed you over here from City Wendy.
