rosie posie

Thanks Copa. I think two sites at the same time is a good idea. I forgot about OKCupid, I’ll look into that and Coffee Meets Bagel for him. If the free sites don’t seem to be panning out for him we can look into Match. Maybe it’s changed around here since I used it. If a free month works for him maybe I can help him pay for a few additional months.

I agree about him being upfront about his disability. I’m leaning towards advising him to address it if someone brings it up and if they don’t to wait and mention it to them if they go out a second time. He is blind in one eye with very poor vision in the other. Anyone who sees him trying to read something, like a menu, would notice. I think that it has caused him to miss out learning social cues like body language and such. So he doesn’t always pick up on nonverbal cues, similar to struggles some people with certain kinds of autism have.

What we do is similar to @ktfran. We didn’t live together until we were married (not for religious reasons we just were both used to living independently and enjoyed our space) and once he moved in I continued paying my mortgage and homeowners insurance and I buy all the groceries/household products. He pays all the utilities, and the health and car insurance. It works out to be less than he paid in rent alone so it’s a good deal for him and took a bunch off my plate. When we go out we take turns paying. He does make a considerable amount more than me so typically the more expensive meals or if we are treating friends to dinner he will pay. We have discussed that when we have kids and/or buy a house together we will need to have a joint account we put the same percentage of our income into and also maintain our own individual accounts. I don’t want to feel I need to explain why I bought a new dress and he doesn’t want to feel he needs to explain why he bought the latest electronic toy he wanted. My mom was a stay at home mom and my dad managed all the money. I know she always felt guilty if she wanted something for herself (which was almost never) and I never want to feel that way and my husband agrees that neither one of us ever should.

I’m going to throw in on this because I know that I do not like men approaching me at the gym and I know a number of other women who very sensitive about this. I am not saying there is anything wrong with the OP but every co-ed gym I have ever belonged to have had at least a few creepers and women are very aware of this, so I think he should tread lightly. I agree with the other recommendations to start with smiling and then if she responds in kind move to a “hi” if she is near you. She may be receptive and have an interest to you as well and you can proceed from there. However, please be aware of her body language and if she’s throwing off signals that she does not want to be spoken to. Many people are purely there to workout. You can tell the people who are open to socializing.