Your Turn: “How Many Gifts Do I Have to Give as a Bridesmaid?”

It’s been a long time since we had a Your Turn column, where I let you take the reigns of giving the advice, so here you go: I will be a bridesmaid in a wedding this year for a relatively new friend. This is my first time serving as a bridesmaid, and I’m a little unclear about the etiquette. I gave her and her fiancé an engagement gift. I have already purchased my dress and shoes to wear in her wedding later this year. I have been invited to: -her theme park bachelorette party (which I will probably be canceling due to the rise in COVID) -her bridal shower coming up in…

“I Feel Guilty for Being Wealthier Than My Friends”

First of all, let me start by saying I know this is a non-problem to have, and I’d never discuss it with anyone in person because I’m not an idiot. I hope it isn’t offensive. But it’s something that has happened to me and if anyone else has experienced it, I’d find advice helpful. My husband and I are normal professionals with normal jobs. For the past 30 years, we’ve lived frugally – we bought a very modest home, we rarely vacationed or ate at restaurants, we bought used cars, we didn’t keep balances on credit cards, and we always invested our spare money. That, combined undeniably with luck — we were…

“My Best Friend Stood Me Up After I Said I Was Suicidal”

I’m a 19-year-old female and have had this guy friend, “Joe,” for years. We met in my first year of high school and we were basically two peas in a pod. We were different in a lot of ways – he was extroverted and outgoing, I’m introverted and to myself – but overall, we were great together and had a pretty tight friendship. Hell, there might’ve been a small part of me that may have been in love with him, but I don’t know if it’s truly that I felt that, or if it’s cause I’m just a sucker for and hope to live out one of those “best friend turned partner”…

“Should I Say Yes to Babysitting My Niece Once a Week?”

From the forums: My brother has a daughter, my beautiful little niece, who is approaching 2 years old. Bit of a back story on my brother: He has never really been able to hold a job for very long (usually from preferring to sleep or go out drinking with his mates than go to work), he has been in and out of trouble with the law for most of his adult life, he’s not respectful of women in many ways, and he has a foul temper. (To my knowledge he has never laid his hands on a woman, but he has been known to get into many many fights with other men…

Update: Sister of “Questioning my Sister” Responds (Again)

It’s time again for “Dear Wendy Updates,” a feature where people I’ve given advice to in the past let us know whether they followed the advice and how they’re doing now. Today we hear again not from a LW, but from the subject of a letter. In this case, it’s the sister of “Questioning my Sister,” who thought her sister was giving bad advice to her teenage sons and wondered if she should offer a different POV to her nephews. Her sister, the mother of the teenage boys, read the letter posted here and shared her response to that with us a couple weeks ago, which a lot of us felt changed…

“My Ex-Partner Said He’d Report Me to the Police if I Contact Him Again”

Seven months ago I moved across the country to start a new career. My partner at the time, “Greg,” told me in no uncertain terms he would be following me in a few months’ time so we could carry on our relationship and build a life together. We had been together nine months at that point and had been living together for six months. We are both mid-thirties, and had made plans to start a family. We had a genuinely good relationship, open communication, shared interests, but also separate lives and friends outside of the relationship. After I left to move, Greg called me everyday, and continued to make future plans. When…

Update: “Muted Voice” Responds

It’s time again for “Dear Wendy Updates,” a feature where people I’ve given advice to in the past let us know whether they followed the advice and how they’re doing now. Today we hear from “Muted Voice,” a woman who wrote in nearly ten years ago (!) asking how to tell her husband of twenty years how deeply unhappy she was. He was verbally abusive, he never helped with childcare or domestic chores, and she was ready to leave the marriage – she even had an apartment picked out to move into – but didn’t know how to do it. “I have a history of not standing up for myself and I have…

“Should My Husband and I Move to the US?”

My Husband, “Pete,” and I live in Canada and are considering a move to the US to follow an amazing career opportunity for Pete – one that he’d stay with until retirement. There’s so much that Pete and I have been discussing, from missing our friends and family to how often we would visit “home” to how we might go about making friends in a new place, especially when the culture would be a bit different and it’s already hard to make friends as an adult. We’re 39 and 41 with no kids and no possibility of this happening, so schooling is not a factor to consider for us. We’re currently located…

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