You Turn: “Her Step-dad Assaulted Me. Can We Still Be Friends?”

In a new feature I’m calling “Your Turn,” in which you, the readers, get to answer the question, I’m presenting the following letter without commentary from me: I have a friend who I was close with in high school, and we know attend the same college. She’s been having a really difficult time as of late. Her stepfather (who taught both of us in high school) was recently incarcerated for inappropriate relations and sexual assaults of some of his female students. She’s been emotionally fragile in the past, and battled low self-esteem and a very serious eating disorder when we were younger. Since her stepdad’s arrest, she has moved in with a…

“I’m Tired of Denying My Bisexual Desires”

I have been with my boyfriend for about six years. We have a great relationship and he has been a better father to my child than her own father has been. We get along great, he’s an amazing cook and absolutely rocks my body in bed! I never thought I ever wanted to get married but we’ve actually been discussing it here and there and it feels right! There is one little problem though: I’m bisexual and don’t think I can be satisfied without having a woman in my life. For many years, I even thought I might have been a lesbian, and I’d be in a relationship with a woman now…

“Should I Turn In My Ex?”

My boyfriend of a year and a half recently ended our relationship (via Facebook chat!), citing that there was too much stress in his life to have a relationship. There were lots of “I still love you” from both sides and “maybe the breakup will end up being a mistake” and a bunch of other sappy cop-out lines from him to try and protect my poor, delicate feelings. It has now become clear from talking to his friends, that he was bored and unhappy for quite some time before he ended it. Throughout the relationship, he was grumpy, negative, bitter, refused to hang out with my friends, destroyed my self-esteem, and now…

“I’m Muslim, But I Don’t Want To Wait Until Marriage To Have Sex”

I am a single Pakistani-American Muslim girl, born and raised in the U.S., and I just turned twenty. I’m very secular, but I believe in God and the various tenets of Islam. (I’m comparable to Christians who only go to church on Easter and Christmas.) My immediate family is very much like me, but the rest of our family, who we are very close with, take religion quite seriously. I’m expected to marry a Muslim man someday, which I have absolutely no problem with; I do want my eventual children raised under this faith. Here’s my problem: I really, really want to have sex now. I’m twenty, and I’m still a virgin….

“Can I Ask My Party Guests To Pay For Their Own Dinners?”

My boyfriend’s birthday is coming up and I’m planning on throwing him a nice dinner at an upscale steakhouse in Beverly Hills. I have already gotten confirmations from 18 of his/our closest friends and family on Facebook. Today when I called the steakhouse to make reservations, the banquet coordinator informed me that for a party that large I must fill out a contract with my credit card info agreeing that we will spend a minimum of $2000 on food and beverages excluding tax, gratuity (17%) and service charge (4%) and that there will be a $500 cancellation fee. While I can understand why a restaurant would implement a cancellation fee, a contract…

His Take: “Is He Ready For Our Future or Not??”

My boyfriend of a year seems leery of taking the next step in our relationship. I have tried to talk to him about moving in together when I buy a house in a few months, but he has been resistant to the idea. (FYI: I don’t plan to buy the house with him, just for him to live there with me and pay rent.) After dealing with him avoiding conversations about future plans while still constantly saying how he wants to be with me and loves me so much, I’ve decided to not bring it up again until I’m closer to house-shopping time. Then last night, out of the blue, he says…

“My BFF Is Being Exploited For a Marriage Visa and It’s All My Fault!”

Last August, a friend of mine visited from out of the country. Part of his stated mission for visiting the US was to “find a wife” so he could immigrate to the US. Toward the end of his stay, I made a mistake I’ll probably regret forever: my husband and I introduced him to my single, lonely best friend with the half-serious pretext that he could pay her for marriage (she is a non-working college student so we figured she could use the money, and she also desperately wants to leave her parents’ house.) Needless to say, two days after they first met they were “in love” and had decided to get…

“My Future In-Laws Snubbed Me!”

I recently got engaged to a wonderful man. Monday evening something was mentioned to us about his cousin’s baby shower taking place this Sunday. I was not invited and had no idea it was going on. My fiancé mentioned this to his mother, and she mentioned it to her sister (the mother of the expecting woman and the hostess), and asked why I was not invited. The hostess called me yesterday to apologize and explain she did not invite me because she doesn’t know me very well, and didn’t want me to feel obligated to come. She then insisted several times I come to the party, and left me stammering. She hung…

“Once a Cheater, Always a Cheater?”

I’ve been talking to a guy for about four months over the internet, Skype, and phone. We met once when we were both in relationships (he was one of my ex’s friends) and I instantly liked him as a person, and he later admitted he felt the same, but we never really talked much until we were both single. We have amazing chemistry from what I can tell, and are planning to meet up this summer. He’s currently living in another country, but will be moving back to the states in a month or two. We’ve talked about the possibility of being in a relationship if all goes well when we spend…

His Take: “Should I Dump My FWB?”

I recently engaged in a long-distance, friends-with-benefits relationship with an acquaintance. After contacting him regarding a business question, he poured his heart out about ending his relationship, and I consciously decided to support him in his time of need (he was also dealing with frustrations and stress at work). He eventually proposed visiting me and we decided to take it to the next level (physically) but agreed to stay casual and friends only. From that first day, we were in contact daily for six months. We traveled across the country to visit each other multiple times and we talked about everything in our lives. And then it just stopped. I tried to…

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