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Six years ago I saw my brother-in-law (my sister’s husband) holding hands with another woman. My memory is he walked out of the bar with her, and his friend (a male) following behind. I was absolutely shocked, to say the least. A few days later I had a conversation with him about what we did on the weekend and I mentioned that I was at that same bar. He flinched. It’s as if his body language said “Shit, I hope he didn’t see me.” A few weeks later I confronted him and asked him about it. His response was that I was “reading too much into it” and that it was a…

​​It’s time again for Shortcuts. For every question, I’ll give my advice in just a few sentences because sometimes the answer to a person’s question is so obvious and the need to hear it so great that being as clear and frank as possible is simply the best way to go. My boyfriend is seven years older then I am, so I don’t like to tell him he can’t hang out with his friends when he chooses to hang out with them over me because there are some things I can’t legally do like drink. However, he has this one female friend who often hangs out with him alone. She asked him…

I began communicating with my beau online over five months ago. “George” is black and I am white; I commonly refer to him as the black, male version of my best friend since childhood. We felt an immediate connection, even reminiscing about many childhood similarities. I have never experienced such a complete connection at the soul level. We are both divorced (he for ten years and I for almost two, but after a long process of counseling and healing before I filed) and in our mid-forties. It has been wonderful; we have had four dates, three of them meeting halfway between us (the third one was overnight) and once when I drove…

I am writing you in desperation. Yesterday was my mother’s birthday and I asked her not to make any food for me or my family because I did not want to bother her, but she kept insisting on making food. Finally, I said I will also make a dish, but she said no. So I said OK and then I went to her house to celebrate her birthday, but I guess she was so exhausted making food that she told my brother, “Next time when it’s my birthday, just take me to a restaurant.” Well, I got offended, because I told her not to make food and then she was complaining to…

New readers, welcome to Dear Wendy, a relationship advice blog. Read some of the most popular Dear Wendy posts here. If you don’t find the info you need in this column, please visit the Dear Wendy archives or the forums (you can even start your own thread), do a search in the search bar, or submit a question for advice at wendy(AT)dearwendy.com. I have been dating my boyfriend for seven months. We are both 29 and met online. At first it was a long-distance relationship (he lived almost two hours away) but, wanting to be closer, I moved. He owns a business and I am nurse, so the move was easier for…

Three quickies today: I met this girl recently and I really like her, and I know she really likes me back, but when we started dating exclusively she let me know that she was interested in joining the Navy. I supported her decision and she recently passed the medical tests and leaves in April for basic training which lasts three months. If she passes, she will be gone for four years and she only gets to come home two times a year. We will only have been dating exclusively for two months by then and we got exclusive pretty soon after we met. I want to make things work with her, but…

My boyfriend of a year wants me to move in with him. He owns his own business, and I work as a teacher. I’d help with bills and I’d contribute as we will be a team as we always have been. However, his mother lives with him and is very dependent on him. She won’t go anywhere without him. She doesn’t take up much space, but she is an emotional wreck and she has no consideration for anyone around her. She makes my boyfriend feel like a piece of scum most of the time, and he refuses to say anything because he was raised with the whole “children are seen, not heard”…

New readers, welcome to Dear Wendy, a relationship advice blog. Read some of the most popular Dear Wendy posts here. If you don’t find the info you need in this column, please visit the Dear Wendy archives or the forums (you can even start your own thread), do a search in the search bar, or submit a question for advice at wendy(AT)dearwendy.com. I am a 47-year-old mom of two. My son is 21 and in college, and my daughter is 17 and a senior in high school. My husband of of twenty-two years passed away three years ago after a long fight with cancer. My son has always been easy-going and happy….

New readers, welcome to Dear Wendy, a relationship advice blog. Read some of the most popular Dear Wendy posts here. If you don’t find the info you need in this column, please visit the Dear Wendy archives or the forums (you can even start your own thread), do a search in the search bar, or submit a question for advice at wendy(AT)dearwendy.com. I am in the Army and stationed on the east coast. I’m dating a 29-year-old school teacher. She’s a single mom and I’m a divorced father but don’t have custody. I feel like she is too close to her parents and it’s causing a huge strain on our relationship. They…

I’m 23, my boyfriend is 29. Two nights ago my boyfriend had a seizure and cracked his head open on the floor. I was the first and only responder until EMS showed up. Blood flowed into a large puddle surrounding his head, SO MUCH BLOOD. His eyes looked nowhere, and his skin turned grey. I believed he was on the brink of death, and battled my own shock, to keep him with me while I waited an excruciating twenty minutes for EMS. I’m a lifeguard part time while finishing university, so I know basic first aid and I’ve been in situations like this before (though this was the most serious by far)….