@Copa & @Veritek I’m reading it right now too, intermittently between some other books. It’s actually making me sad because it’s so true and really discouraging. I appreciate the very high quality of writing and philosophical thought, though. Aziz is always acerbically witty and accurate.

I’m going to spend my Friday evening with my dog and Orange is the New Black…combing through Meetup groups and Facebook events to put some more in-person meeting-new-people things on my schedule and then make myself a plan to actually DO them in the next 2 months. 🙂

I’m listening to the audiobook!

I love Aziz. I started following him on Instagram after watching Master of None and he’s been posting pictures from Italy and Barcelona.

Hi guys! Longtime lurker on both this site and this thread on dating in particular. I’m on the younger side (22) and I’ve really enjoyed reading the dating insights of those much wiser and more experienced than I. I very recently graduated from college, moved to D.C. to start what is essentially a dream job, and ditched my college relationship (which in retrospect was truly awful and toxic.) I took 2 months to process my feelings of anger both at my ex-boyfriend and myself for putting up with his behavior (it’s hard when you care about someone who’s going through a rough time) and now I wanted to get back in the game, if you will. Since my office is tiny and I don’t have a super wide social network here yet, I downloaded Tinder and it’s been, well, overwhelming. Still managed to meet many interesting an intelligent people and had 2 dates this weekend.

Let’s call the guy from Saturday the Buddhist, since he is one. We didn’t talk much before meeting for a drink, so I didn’t really know what to expect. But once we sat down and started talking, we couldn’t stop. He’s 23 years old and a biologist (I always go for scientists for some reason; my last 3 boyfriends were all STEM people. Maybe it’s because my parents are engineers and deep down I’m mad that the science gene skipped me?) and he was extremely outgoing, genuine, and kind of dorky in a good way. He was very impressed that I managed to have a job right after graduating, and he made multiple comments that I had a “great personality” and that I was “very charming” (!) He lives in the Maryland suburbs of D.C. which is not ideal but not a deal-breaker either. He timidly kissed me after I walked him back to his metro stop, which just felt very sweet. I texted him later to thank him for the date and we’re going out to dinner in his town later this week. I’m not looking to jump into a serious relationship right now, but I’m excited to see where this goes.

And then today I got gelato with a man who shall be known as Whatshisface, since I can’t for the life of me remember his name (don’t you guys all want to date me now?) We engaged in some witty Tinder banter, but I wasn’t expecting much going in because he was a REALLY flaky texter. He’s 25 so a few years older than me, and it really showed. We talked a lot about current political issues and it turns out we had the same views which was cool, but didn’t get to know a lot about each other. We then went for a walk on the Georgetown waterfront, where he wasted no time leading me to a bench and kissing me. He was good at it, and honestly that was just what I was craving after my boy hiatus, but that was really the only good part. He was a really impressive person, he graduated from a fancy school (not quite Ivy League but pretty damn close) has a fancy job, and was starting an even fancier phd program abroad in the fall, and it was clear that he felt pretty highly of himself, but can you really blame him? He didn’t really ask me about myself, which is too bad for him since I’m hella interesting. It seemed as though while the Buddhist spoke to me as if he held me above him, Whatshisface spoke as if I were beneath him, in a way. I don’t think I want to see him again, unless it’s for purely political conversation. I sent him the obligatory thank you text to be polite, but he hasn’t responded. Flaky, I tell you.

This was oddly fun to write. Perhaps you guys can laugh at my 22-year-old predictable dating mistakes as they accumulate?

Yeah, keep swiping. You can’t remember the second one’s name, and you like the first one because he’s impressed with you and is a biologist. They both sound like a snooze fest.

Also, not replying to your thank you text isn’t “flaky,” it’s a polite way of saying he’s not interested.

Oh I totally need to read that book!

I’m feeling pretty lonely lately. People always assume since I’m outgoing and am involved in a lot that I always have plans and have a ton of friends. Holidays are always the hardest for me, because at 31 almost every person I know is married/in a serious relationship and either doing couples things (and assumes I have more fun single people things to do) or aren’t doing anything and staying in just the two of them. This is exacerbated by the fact that I would normally spend 4th of July BBQing with my family, but I live 2,000 miles away from my family and have no one here.

I feel super awkward when people ask me what I’m doing for the holiday and I have to say “nothing yet.” They’re always really surprised and ask why I’m not going out or seeing the fireworks and then I have to explain that I honestly have no one to go with. I feel ok most of the time (like I went out all weekend with my best friend, who is heading out of town this weekend to see her bf) and people are just used to me being an organizer (like work happy hours every other week, etc.) so they assume someone else must have invited me to something. Just feeling deeply deeply lonely.

Guy that broke up with me two weeks ago keeps texting me random things (like about soccer and GOT). I think he just wants to be nice/feel like I don’t hate him. It’s all very odd, and I know it will fade out altogether pretty soon. He’s going to Cape Cod this weekend with friends. And I’ll be here on Tinder, drinking wine with my cat.

4th of July is the worst. When people ask me what I’m doing, I typically tell them my family doesn’t celebrate it. Which is true. The fireworks trigger my brother’s PTSD, so it’s just not worth risking him having a flashback. Plus last year one of his friends committed suicide on the 4th. My parents are going camping for the weekend, and my brother is still in Florida. So I will probably spend the day reading some books with my cats. Which sounds a lot more relaxing than dealing with a bunch of drunk people shoving each other around for a better view of fireworks that can be seen from miles away.