DW Community Catch-up Thread
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@LadyE exactly. I thought I was weird because I wasn’t getting mani pedis with a girl squad to get over someone. My girls squad is actually my mom and my grandma, we go out to lunch or coffee and we spend a good time together.
@Ange I don’t think LadyE is expecting this friend to walk her through this.
I don’t want people to walk me through anything but it is nice to talk to someone sometimes. I’ve heard my best friends fears and feelings about a million times now. I know them. And I would never be like, oh yeah you’re single get over it! Or “it was only six weeks” that is not a very empathic response. If they come to me for help for the millionth and one time I will be there. And that is why I expect them to be the same with me. But I guess we are all different.
@Ange I was speaking generally about my best friend, not about this relationship specifically. Her personal tragedy is a years-long thing that has been going on for 4+ years and will go on for 2 more at least. I am also there for her whenever she needs, it’s not one-sided by any means and I have done as much as I know how to support her and will continue to. It’s difficult sometimes because I’m not going to take the time to spell out every.single.detail of my life/my friends’ lives so I appreciate the benefit of the doubt once in awhile.
@Ale, thank you, and I feel the same way about friendships. People are allowed to feel their feelings, and if I want to be a good friend I should be there when they need no matter the level I *think* they should need me. To me, that’s what being a good friend is all about – showing up and listening.My mom is actually going to visit me next weekend so it’ll be nice to get some time with her. I do lean on her a lot and she’s very supportive. I’m glad to hear you are this way with your mom and grandma too! 🙂
Axe throwing: fun date or weird date?
As much as I think friends should be empathetic to break-ups and dating disappointment, it has limits. The friend I mentioned in a recent comment? She used to call me super upset if a guy didn’t text her promptly after a first date, or crying if a guy just wasn’t that into it after 1-2 dates. And I tried to be supportive, but she was exhausting. I *did* tell her that she needed to get a grip, and because this was a pattern with *every* guy she went out with, I’d drill her to ask if SHE even liked the guy, and what she liked about him, or if it was just about wanting to be liked. I understand that even short relationships ending can be painful, and as a friend, yeah, I do try to be supportive. But I don’t think it’s necessarily inappropriate to tell a friend, “Hey, you gotta snap out of it.” (Not saying any of this necessarily applies to anyone on this thread.)
I was supposed to go maybe a month or so ago wit my alumni association, but tripped and fell on the lakeshore path (like a winner!) while I was out running beforehand and twisted my ankle badly enough that I couldn’t walk. I mentioned the date idea to a friend I was texting this morning, and she told me it was weird and dumb. Ha.
My only thing with axe throwing, would it be better in a group sometime? But I still think it would be fun!
My company is the one splitting the lakeshore path into peds vs. bikes. We’re working out a lighting contract now so it’s better lit.
It might be better in a group situation, I dunno! I don’t know what to expect. It was free to reserve a lane so I was gonna come up with a couple ideas and let Awkward Texter decide which he prefers. I’d rather do something active with him at this point, than something passive like a movie.
I’m so excited for a better lit lakeshore path! The path has already been split near where I live, and nobody uses the proper lane!
It took me a few runs to even notice the signs indicating which lane was appropriate for my activity/direction, but once I figured it out, I started using it properly. Last summer an angry biker pulled up alongside of me and matched my pace so that he could grab me by the shoulder and tell me off (I wasn’t running far enough to the right for his liking). I was so surprised that he dared to touch me that I started shouting obscenities at him as he rode off. Not my finest moment, but man, I wanted to throw my water bottle at him!
