DW Community Catch-up Thread
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January 19, 2018 at 7:39 am #736269
@copa, lose momentum? As in keeping regular dates? Or are you starting to see things floundering with him? If you are feeling that way when one date is missed, might be a sign to MOA and cut your losses if one missed date may result in a loss of the very recent budding relationship…But please clarify if I am totally off! 😛
I guess I really do think momentum is a thing, especially with online dating. Investment for the first handful of dates is relatively low. I saw him two weekends ago, was out of town for work for several days last week, and we were planning on this weekend. Before our last date, we went a couple weeks without seeing each other because of the holidays. So yeah, I realize some scheduling issues like travel or flu season can’t be helped, but when things are still so tentative, I don’t love having dates spaced so far apart.
JimmyjammJanuary 19, 2018 at 6:50 pm #736329Hey everyone
Wow so much has happened, but not really.
I have been divorced and remarried since I have last visited this page, some of you are still doing the same old same old.
Just imagine, you find the one and he finds out you bought a wedding dress months ago.
January 20, 2018 at 7:23 am #736354@jimmyjamm Hope you are happy in the new marriage!
Can’t imagine why you’d be divorced @jimmyjamm, but congratulations (I suppose) on your marriage. You sure sound like the picture of emotional health and I’m glad you’ve never dealt with the same old same old. Please do visit this page again to keep us up-to-date with your next divorce.
@Dre Four. First two were a week apart, second two have been spaced farther apart than I would’ve liked.
January 20, 2018 at 10:40 pm #736381I don’t blame you for worrying, it is hard when schedules don’t match, and from personal experience find at least once a week dates help keep things fresh and moving. I think you need to gauge it on your own. Do you still talk frequently? Are the conversations one sided? Has there been more ‘action’ than empty promises to get together (despite the circumstances)? It has been a short while and if you gut is telling you to cut it, then do it. Better to devote your time to someone who has a similar schedule to yours.
Yeah, I mean, we’re still talking regularly. I know he can’t help getting sick any more than I was able to help getting sent to on a trip to my company’s HQ. So I’m just gonna keep feeling it out and see what happens, but it’s kinda disappointing thinking another one’s about to bite the dust.
In other news, met that guy from Match yesterday. He was very nice and we had a bit in common, but he came on way too strong in what I assume was an attempt to charm me. He gets a six-week sabbatical for work and will be traveling during that time beginning next month. He repeatedly made comments about whisking me off to Europe, and how I could be his tour guide in Asia cause I lived there as a tween/teen. He planned aloud our perfect Valentine’s Day (which, apparently, would be playing video games and drinking wine). He kept making comments along the lines of “OMG, I’m on a date with COPA!” All errant comments taken together were too much and turned me off. Turns out, he works with/is work buddies with a friend’s husband, so I asked about him after. Friend’s Husband really likes him but wasn’t surprised that he was awkward.
Sorry to hear about BCB (FWIW I thought it stood for Before Christmas Boy) — definitely postponing today? I can see the frustration of the gap between dates. But the four dates seem to indicate there’s interest and perhaps you can “reset” once he gets better. Or let it go.
K, I cringed really hard reading about Match guy date. Especially on a first date!! I guess that’s the thing with online dating where there’s no context and only impressions, it’s harder to give exceptions to weird first date jitters behaviour/easier to walk away if it’s super awkward. Has Match Guy reached out to you since yesterday?
January 21, 2018 at 1:34 pm #736407@copa I have to laugh at that date with the guy from Match as I had a similar experience with someone last year around this time. He kept mentioning how we have so much in common, this is so great, yadda yadda. He came off way to strong, mind you I did one more date with him as I sensed he was a little nervous, so attributed his ramblings to that? So I ended up seeing the same thing the second time around, talked about what we wanted in life and because, yes, it matched up, he came off desperate to make it sound like we were perfect for one another. He took a while to go away as he was convinced I would change my mind.
Surprisingly enough my BF has mentioned doing stuff for V-day a couple times. I asked him if that day was important to him, he said no but was thinking of things to do regardless. I actually can’t recall if we have plans for that day…We plan to do a big cheat meal the weekend after I get back from Hawaii to celebrate the “end” of my Whole 30 diet. But since VDay lands on a Wednesday not sure if we will do anything.
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