DW Community Catch-up Thread
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Oh, and I think in this or another thread we were talking about introducing the people we’re dating to friends, and I had mentioned that I don’t think it’s a huge deal to introduce friends early-ish on, but anyone I date probably wouldn’t meet a lot of key players in my life for awhile because of distance. About a month from now, three of my best friends from middle and high school overseas are going to be in town. And I’m excited that BG will get to meet them, because I’ve known them forever — they knew me when I had awful bangs and acne! — but we live in different states/countries/continents and reunions are hard and happen once every year if we’re lucky. I’m excited for everyone to be together. One is traveling with her boyfriend, and I’ve never met him. Another is bringing her fiance, and I’ve met him once and he’s a good man.
Yup, we celebrated our anniversary based on our first date at the end of August but we didn’t make things official until a couple months in. I guess online dating usually makes the anniversary date easier to choose!
I’m so glad things are going well with BG. How long has it been for you? Exciting he can meet your close friends!
Eh, it’s been like three months, so it’s still pretty new. We haven’t had the exclusivity talk, but I feel good about things.
I had the define-the-relationship talk last weekend, so we’re officially exclusive. I still don’t really like to call him my “boyfriend,” partly because we’re both in our 30s and maybe a little because it’s been over three years since I last had a boyfriend. Anyway, it’s nice. We’ve been dating for about 4 months, and this whole time has felt really easy. I never felt insecure about whether he liked me, if he would text me back, and so on–none of the usual anxiety. Our biggest problem is finding enough time to spend together because of his work schedule.
@shakeourtree That’s basically how I feel! No dating anxiety here. It feels easy. I really look forward to seeing him. He’s so kind and nonjudgmental and affectionate, and he already feels like a safe space. I think if he were someone else I’d be kinda panicked that we weren’t exclusive by now, but he’s consistent and reliable and I’m not worried. (Famous last words!? Ha!) I actually told my therapist that I feel like I have all this free time/free mental space that I’d normally waste on worry.
@Copa – I love that safe feeling. That lack of anxiety just feels so good. I’m so glad things are going well with BG. MofV makes me feel very similar.
@shakeourtree glad things are going well for you too! @hfantods congrats on your one year!Update on MofV – we looked at rings on Saturday and it was very surreal! Now, we are not getting one any time soon because we need to get him moved up here first. BUT, now he knows what I like and a price range we are both comfortable with! Also, he ordered my favorite coffee from a local roastery to be delivered to my house twice a month and if I didn’t want to marry him already I sure as shit do now. Any man that buys me caffeine knows the way to my heart.
Gotcha, was just curious as it has felt like a good chunk of time, Copa.
Wow, that’s big Ver! I don’t think I actually know my comfortable price range because I’ve never looked. (But I am also not there yet with my guy.)
@veritek YAY! Omg! That’s so exciting. You ARE a success story even if you won’t call yourself one!
Random and possibly weird question: Do couples these days go in on the cost of an engagement ring together? I remember when I was like 23 one of my friends got engaged and she was such a snot about it, saying things like “You’re not ready to get married if your fiance can’t afford at least a $10K engagement ring!” and “My fiance loves me $XX,000 amount.” (BARF!) And, I’m someone who would like a nice ring (not necessarily expensive, just one I like) and would be fine splitting the cost, but IDK if that’s common.
Um, anything goes, from him paying for it himself to you paying for it yourself, to you using the diamond your gay ex-boyfriend who was also your hairdresser gave you, reset into a new ring. Does. Not. Matter.
And has no bearing whatsoever on how things will turn out. He can spend $2 or $10,000 or you can buy it or use your grandmother’s ring, and you’ll either work out or you won’t.
