DW Community Catch-up Thread
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KateOctober 12, 2018 at 9:52 am #804691
Also, as to what’s common, I’ve seen / heard it all, but that also doesn’t matter, because 1) you have to do what works for you as a couple, and 2), you’re not going to talk to anyone about how much it cost or who paid because that’s tacky and no ones business. One thing though, if you find you’re with a guy who insists on paying for the whole thing but can’t get you the ring you really want and won’t let you contribute or buy it, maybe he’s not the right guy. For you. He would be for someone else.
TheHizzyOctober 12, 2018 at 11:12 am #804696We paid for mine together. We spent time time looking online together and then shopping in person. We had VERY different tastes. Everything I liked was on what I felt was a “higher end” (Over $1500) and to ensure I had what I wanted I helped to pay.
10/10 would do again.
@copa for our situation, he wants to pay for the engagement ring himself. And we would both pay for the wedding bands. What I was looking at online and in person was relatively reasonable for our budget (1-2k) and he was fine with that price point. If I wanted something more than that I’d offer to chip in for it.
Though, we’ve also talked about looking at estate sales to see if we can find a cool antique ring and I have no idea what the prices would be on those. I don’t want anyone going into debt or taking out loans/credit cards to get rings. So for us, we’ve just agreed on a certain amount not to go over.
Yeah, mostly curious, none of this is relevant to my life right now. I have a lot of friends who have (or had) ring expectations I find weird, like needing it to cost over a certain amount (the three months’ salary rule or whatever is absurd to me) and braying about it, whereas all I really want is to be equal partners in a marriage and to my mind that would include a ring.
I really like a lot of vintage/antique rings.
KateOctober 12, 2018 at 1:59 pm #804717My mom got so lucky in 1972… her MIL, who was widowed, took her art-deco platinum ring with a flawless 1-ct diamond off and gave it to my mom. Because my parents were trying to be cool or something and my mom had this big star-Sapphire thing for an engagement ring, and then she was in the hospital having my brother, and my dad wasn’t there for some reason, he was out of town, and they thought my mom was unmarried and drugged her up and put her in a room with a 13-year-old from up north in NH having a baby and it was all crazy. So my grandmother felt bad and was like, have my ring. The wack part is my dad once confided in me that he thought they switched the two babies by mistake, theirs and the 13-year-old girl’s, and not to tell my mom but he’s not sure my brother is their kid.
JDOctober 12, 2018 at 2:12 pm #804718I didn’t have a price point but I don’t like tiny diamonds so I was clear either a reasonable sized one (not huge just not a pin dot on a band type look) or no diamond at all and just a band. I love my ring, it’s oval. I tried on every different shape and they just did not suit my hand. A lot more oval rings around these days I have noticed. My aunt has a size 3 finger so my uncle always brags that her ring looks huge on her, it does. I have fat fingers so small stones look like my hand is eating it.
My mom has a star sapphire ring somewhere, it’s super cool! I’m not a ring person, and never have been, when I wear jewelry, I never reach for the rings I own. I kinda think I’d be someone who would forget to put an engagement ring or wedding band on half the time.
@copa I specifically want something very simple and NOT soldered together because I was to just wear the band some days. I’m hard on rings – case in point – I wear a Claddagh ring every day. I forgot to take it off for crossfit one night and snapped part of the gold in the back where two sections of the ring meet while lifting the barbell. I’m now paying to have it fixed. So, I can’t have anything too fancy or elaborate because 10/10 I will break it or damage in some way before I die.
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