Covid Support Thread
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Yeah I need to think. We could easily drive to them, but rain is in the forecast so I’m wondering how likely the outdoor scenario is. His stepdad is in remission from cancer but still has some health issues from it so I am very surprised by how cavalier he’s been. Knowing he’s high risk seems to make ME more uncomfortable than it makes HIM! (On a Zoom call with my boyfriend’s family, another family member make a comment about the federal government letting us down and his stepdad got upset and left the call.) I thought I’d have a bit more time before I’d have to weigh these decisions. When small groups are allowed here again (not for another week, and even then it’s unclear to me if the city will have different rules), it’ll be capped at 10 people. And I told my boyfriend about a week ago that I don’t really think I’ll feel comfortable jumping into groups of 10 people right away. We talked about seeing his family somehow at some point in June, which seemed fine in the moment and I figured might even give me a little time to see if there’s a spike in cases as we start to relax our rules, but I didn’t realize his mom would suggest this weekend (before we’ve even reached phase 3).
I drove over to Boston to drop the stuff off for my aunt. You can leave things on a little table right inside. I called her first and she was SO excited to have new things, like it was Christmas. She told me like 3x to make sure to let the person at the front desk know I’m leaving something for her. I feel really bad for her because she’s definitely the most with-it person in there mentally, and there is just nothing to do. They did turn the TV channels back on so she can watch movies, and I guess a nurse let her do something she wasn’t supposed to do, which was so illicit she won’t even tell me what it was, but otherwise it’s so freaking boring and the nurses are working their asses off and don’t have time to chat as much. I don’t know how much she knows about what’s happened with the virus in nursing homes, I haven’t told her any of that. She’s not afraid, just bored.
She can’t, unfortunately. She does have an iPad my dad gave her, but I don’t think her hands are mobile enough to use it without help. The nurses help her check email and stuff. We just talk on the phone.
But when we call her, there ain’t shit to talk about. She used to have visitors almost every day and there were things happening to chitchat about. My mom used to give her a foot rub with lotion (she’s got a lot of stiffness and can only walk assisted), and I would do her nails. So she’s missing all that interaction.
We just got lobster rolls for takeout and it did put us in a better mood to have that classic Memorial Day food. Even though last year at this time we were on a sunset lobster roll boat cruise on cape cod 🙁 With a bar. And with friends.
So the state just said fuck it and ignored its guidelines and said that it’s moving Philly to yellow despite caseloads four times what they’re supposed to be before reopening.
Yellow means offices and some retail but not restaurants or businesses requiring close contact.
Gavin Newsome stated yesterday that on monday — they will reveal guidelines that will magically somehow allow film and television production to resume for much of the state. (Not LA though.)
SAG and the other UNIONS all went… “oh, REALLY?! We think not!”
But non-union losers like me are fucked. We have ZERO protections.
Meanwhile, I’m still not sure what the hell is happening with my unemployment status. I am feeling so overwhelmed by the world and so underwhelmed by my life. Just this constant unending rising sense of panic.
Who the fuck am I kidding? It’s just never going to fall into place. Every passing year I just become more of a loser. More of a failure. More washed up.
Trigger Warning: This next paragraph is really sad. And involved the brutality of nature…
Think Bambi. Read at your own risk.Okay, I’ve had a really rough afternoon. A very grim discovery. I just found a partially eaten dead rabbit on the road out front. The tiny little head was so messed up I simply couldn’t tell for sure if it was Mr. Sass or not. (The Oh-so-curious and sneaky bunny with the three dots on his forehead who pretty much comes to see me every morning and evening.) I secretly buried him really quickly. (Charley would be so upset!) And the. promptly proceeded to have a fucking breakdown. Really ugly loud crying with a face streaked with tears as I frantically shoveled sand over this tiny little broken body.
It sounds insane. But I’ve gotten so damn attached to this adorable bunny the past few months. All through quarantine it feels like… I dunno. I just felt SO bad. I completely came undone. And I mean completely.
An hour later, I’m still hiding out in my room and Charley (thank GId!) is on zoom work meetings all afternoon so I have ample time to pull myself together, I guess.
But if Mr. Sass fails to show up as the afternoon cooldown sets in, I fear I will simply fall apart all over again.
Sorry to vent. To be such a downer. But I just really needed to talk all about this…
Thanks.
Glad it wasn’t him!
Last weekend there were dead baby birds outside the front door, from a nest that a couple of doves have next to A/C on the third floor. There’s a guy who’s really really into these doves, plus the old guy whose window it is and he told me he likes them. My husband saw the babies on the ground when he went out at 6am to take the dog to pee, and I was like, we have to get rid of them. He picked them up with paper towels or something and took them to the trash. I hope no one else saw.
