Cleopatra_30

People aren’t telling you what you ‘can’t’ do, they are telling you what you ‘shouldn’t’ do, there is a difference. You can do what ever you want ultimately, but there are things you shouldn’t do, like continue to pursue someone who has already told you no, and build up a fantasy crush when it seems to be purely one sided. The way you describe your interest suggests that a lot of your interest and feelings for her have been built up off of very limited interactions with her.

So my suggestion, stop treating her like a ‘puzzle,’ or anyone for that matter. You seem to have an interest because you see similar personality traits with her. Use that as a way to actually talk and get to know her, trying to figure her out from a distance and giving ‘signals’ to here is not doing you an favors. If you finally get a chance to actually chat with her and get to know her, then decide if it is appropriate to pursue a relationship with her.

She may in fact, as you eluded to, be solely focused on her family and not interested. But do not take it personally, and do not dwell on what could have been. There has been nothing between you than casual social encounters.

haha this conversation of ‘bad man smell’ is too funny!

When I was younger and living at home, my brothers shared a room. Every time I walked by or had to go in to talk to them it just REEKED. I didn’t understand why their room was so nasty until later in life when I learned about hormones

Mind you, now that all three of us are more athletic we shower way more often. I actually hated showering as a kid, no idea why. But I did not smell as bad as them…at least no one told me haha

For my Boyfriends and I first birthday together I got him passes to do zip lining in the city. Unfortunately it was cancelled so I booked us a sushi making class. That was then delayed and so when we finally go around to doing it, it was Dec or Jan. However being big foodies he really enjoyed it. For his bday this year I made him dinner and dessert (ice cream brownie cake and indian inspired meatball dish). We don’t do big gifts. For xmas this year I suggested filling each others stockings with items. We will make the stocking as well his suggestion.

On another note, holy engagements! 3 of my friends have announced engagements within the week! One is preggers too. All all thinking of a fall wedding, which is when I am supposed to go back to school, so not sure how that will work. But time will tell if and when I get invites.

The ceremony itself happened in the same building as the reception, so we just moved over to the tables afterwards. We had finger foods and the open bar to occupy us, as well as a candy bar. Found out later once the wedding party came back that we weren’t supposed to eat from it until after dinner haha Ended up being a long night, around 9PM when the speeches were done and the dance floor opened. BF and I left at 10:30 due to him being sick that day, and having been around for over 6 hours.

Thanks ladies, I appreciate the support and insight!

Right now my biggest concern is that we haven’t talked long term yet. We have talked about kids, mainly because I don’t want them, so that was brought up pretty early on to make sure we were on the same page. But marriage has never been broached, and for me at least, until I finish school and really get my work life sorted it isn’t on my mind much. But I know it will be a conversation to have next year once we hit 2 years and my potential move happens for school. Mind you, he has expressed support and interest in moving to me if I find work in the city that I go to school at, if that is the case. So I know he isn’t tied down anywhere yet (I am not either), and has thought about the distant future a bit for us.

We are travelling for the first time together in a week or so, nothing major, going to Ontario to visit our respective families and attend a wedding. But something I have not done with a partner before, so new experience and a test to see how we travel together 😛

Finances were talked in depth when I was dealing with my own financial issues. So we are clear on both sides that way. But otherwise, I am not really in the financial position anyways that allows me a way out if things go south. So not moving in right now is kind of limited for me.

He did mention in another conversation started by myself that he wanted to make sure we were compatible living together before I moved away for school. I guess he was worried that if we aren’t then we don’t wait till after I am done school, and several years committed. But I think that was just him pulling at straws to justify a move in.

I like the idea of going back and forth and spending more than a weekend together to experiment living together. That to me is a safe and secure way to test the waters. My friend and her BF of 5 years have done that. I also think he is being very lax about the whole thing because for him it isn’t a big deal. But I think ultimately having those items on Wendy’s list puts into perspective the small things that add up in a relationship that do contribute to compatibility and comfort of living with your partner. He just doesn’t realize the importance of those experiences.

Edit: for context we are both 27 years old. Been together over a year, and both have full time work.

@veritek33 your drunk story reminded me of my own. When I was with my ex a few years ago, he invited me out to his friends/coworkers party at their house. I brought a couple beers (two tall boys), and drank 1 and a half of them. Apparently I was more of a lightweight than anticipated, and we went home where I proceeded to get super sick. I felt so bad cause I had no intention of getting drunk, and honestly thought the two tall boys wouldn’t be that bad on me! He had a roommate at the time and I am sure he enjoyed the sounds. I am pretty sure at one point I went to him in my sick drunken stupor and told him I was dying haha I hadn’t been sick like that before when drinking, so was a total shock to me.

My current boyfriend has probably seen me a little tipsy, but not full drunk. I have no intention to ever get to that level again! Super embarrassing…