CurlyQue
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Dating question. I took a bit of a break and focused on life and had a fwb. Now fwb is moving and i figure it’s time to get back in the game and find a relationship with a future (which i want). I know that when dating via apps you don’t want to text forever and then meet, that you want to meet pretty early on. My question is, what questions are you asking via text to make sure this date is worth your time?
I feel like i waste time with the polite pleasantries (how was your day/weekend etc.) and have ended up on a dates not worth my time. Ex: with a man who was recently separated with 5 children which was a waste of my time, as if this had been listed i wouldn’t have gone out with him.
@Ale, i’m glad you’ve since blocked him on everything! That’s a lot of emotional manipulation he pulled and i really hope you never give him the chance to talk about things again.
Ver you’re soooooooo great and recognizing when you need assistance it’s something i really admire. I hope the therapy appointment tomorrow helps calm your anxiety. While i was one of the ones that thought setting up your wedding for two months before hers wasn’t very nice, i’m also 100% on team Ver because of how ridiculously mean she was!
I hope you get a lot of time hugging your pup. 12, while possibly average for his breed/size is still too young.
Veritek i’m so sorry. You responded so openly to the criticsm you received here regarding having your wedding two months before hers and then she can’t be reasonable about anything. Complained you stepped on her engagement by getting engaged SIX MONTHS after her! Apparently she is the type that wants the entire year(s) to herself.
Do you. Whatever you want. I’m also glad that you and fiance are going to get some premarital counseling and hopefully he’ll get the tools he needs to better respond to his family because i agree freezing up and making you respond to it all isn’t fair.
I agree with BGM and Wendy. It’s not the nicest move to put your wedding two months before hers. I think you know this, but you’re bitter that MoV held off on the engagement because of SIL’s feelings so you don’t care.
If your brunch place has an availability in the fall, AND if you haven’t sent out Save the Dates AND if you won’t lose your deposit i really think you both should consider moving the date.
There’s nothing here to propose that SIL would be upset that your wedding is happening six months ahead of hers like you suggest she would be. Wendy and BGM have already stated why two months seems too close. If anyone gets upset at October you state you want to get the family making happening. 😉 Honor your grandparents by helping celebrate their anniversary on the actual date rather than wanting them to celebrate by celebrating you.
A somewhat generic useful gift, hmm… a scarf, amazon gift card if they deliver in her country, painting class for her and her partner, cooking class for a different kind of cuisine if she’s interested, a movie or show she likes… i just think flowers and a frame while lovely don’t fit the useful definition that you said her culture appreciates.
To be honest, this seems like a really petty thing to even notice. Who cares?! You extended a +1 invite, she’s using her +1, done. Doesn’t matter what you or anyone else would do in the same situation, i’m not sure why it’s worth judging her about it. It seems more likely you’re still upset from the bridal shower (reasonable) and letting it effect how you see all her other actions.
Went on with my closest girlfriend last night and she shared that her and her husband opened their relationship, i get to know because he’s seen me on Tinder and didn’t want me to freak out.
The other news, was that she has an almost boyfriend already and it turns out it’s the guy i dated off and on for about a year when i was 21-22ish so about a decade ago! Apparently he’s also married and in an open relationship.
1. I feel like at least 50% of the dudes on dating sites are non-monogamous (i’m monogamous) at least in my area around Portland. Which is really frustrating.
2. It feels bizarre to even be remembering this dude from so long ago, but after she said his name and showed me a picture all these random memories flooded back (nothing terrible). She had also taken a picture of us at a show a couple weeks ago and sent it to him while we are the and he had remembered me too. It’s just weird, even though it doesn’t matter as i wouldn’t be seeing them together anyways.
Oh bridal showers. I was the maid of honor for a friend last year, and her soon to be MIL started messaging me about how i’m “required” to throw one. I ended up hosting it at my house but the two bridesmaids and my friend’s mother also assisted. It was a brunch theme with a mimosa bar and ended up being a lot of fun.
The only ridiculousness came from her soon to be MIL who had hosted her own surprise bridal shower the weekend before mine (which she was invited to) and then brought all her leftover stuff and tried to use them at mine. We kindly asked her to stop rearranging our stuff to make room for her additions and she huffed and took her items to her car. Oh well.
I don’t comment on this thread very much, though i should considering i’m in the single camp. I did want to say CONGRATS Veritek, ring shopping and him moving in are such big but awesome steps!
Also Alafair and JD a relationship where you’re on the same page and can communicate easily is definitely on my list. lol
@TheHizzy, i do not see it but i also have fleshy arms. Possibly if you had really toned arms and flexed you could see it. The doctor inserting it (beyond telling me how my time is running out to have kids @ 31 yrs old!) told me to check on it every once in a while and if i find it’s moved to come in so far i haven’t noticed anything.
