hfantods

I think I have similar online dating apps experiences as you @MissDre — mid-sized Canadian city, right? I do find the guys on Bumble generally higher quality. Tinder used to be good and there are some gems, but I’m filtering a lot more now. I’ve only chatted to guys on CMB and Hinge; it never went anywhere.

I kind of like that only women message first on Bumble because it takes down that stigma of women messaging first. I know that’s decreasing and you wouldn’t want a guy who cares if a woman messages first, though.

The only discouraging, but kind of good thing, about Bumble is you can tell how many people have swiped right on you. If you pay, you can see who they are, but you can see a pixelated picture for free and kind of tell who has already swiped right. In a smaller city it’s discouraging because I can see not many guys have liked me, but once I go to the major city, that number goes up to 50+. Not that it really matters.

What’s the general difference between Match and eHarmony? I’ve never paid for an online dating site and I am considering it more (maybe later in the summer; I am wicked busy this month). That said I think I would re-activate OKC first to get used to non-app dating again.

ETA: Has anybody used Tastebuds.fm? I signed up, like, seven years ago. You match based on music taste. I’ve never met anybody off it, not that many people use it haha, but man, music snob in me loves seeing what people listen to and if there’s a high match I’m like ooooh.

@MissDre, haha, it would be a great gift!! One guy’s wife bought this class for him. During our intros, there were a few “my wife/girlfriend’s very understanding of my beer obsession” soo yeahh.

@veritek, I don’t think it’s weird to meet guys at church. I mean, it’s not like you’re going there to pick up, haha. The church I go to now is the church I grew up in and it really is the visual of an aging church. I kind of want to find a younger church for fellowship, and well, possibly meeting potential love interests, but it’s also hard to leave the church I’m at because I’ve been there for so long other than when I went away for school.

@Ale, so you actually never met up but you bumped into him after he essentially faded? Ah that is quite the coincidence but it’s a bummer he didn’t feel the same way.

I’ve been fortunate that all the guys I’ve gone out with from online either looked the same or better than their photos. I’m actually often optimistic they will look better because many people just aren’t photogenic.

Just wanted to say… 400 pages! What!?

Also, it was through Addie Pray’s comment on a DW post that I found out about the wonderfulness that is Call Me Maybe and Carly Rae Jepsen all 5 (!) years ago. I am OBSESSED with her new song https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Qlsu7RhOnsQ I like it even better than “I Really Like You”. Listen to it if you haven’t already!!

I like your white top, Miss Dre! It’s very chic farm 😉

That’s really awesome to delete Facebook from your phone, Ver, if you know it’s hurting you.

I went out with a guy the other day. I knew I wasn’t feeling it but the conversation was fine. Near the end of the date he asked if I wanted to go to this new place we had talked about. And I knew I had to decline so I did. Well my exact words were “Oh… I’m ok.” Yeah, need to work on that. He was fortunately really polite after and even said that now he knows a new coffee place in the city.

I was kind of bummed after that date, because it sucks being the rejected and the rejector. I mean it’s good I said no, because I’ve gone enough first dates to know when I actually want to go on a second, but still, sad feelings.

I was just messaging a guy. I thought we were more chatty so I said something without asking a question. He hasn’t replied and I’m going crazy (in a totally self-aware way)! I either let this fade or do a double text in a day? Arrrg.

For me it’s an internet safety thing. But like I said, I can’t judge anybody’s parenting choice seeing as I’m not a parent. It’s very possible that his daughters consent to him posting pictures of them.

Have fun @cleo camping! We are having cool temps this long weekend in southern Ontario 🙁

@missdre, love hearing about your trip! I’m glad new work is going well.

Just saw this on Tinder: “My bad! I’m 40, but I look 34, amirite?”. Agggg. I guess at least he was honest before a date. He was also open about being a father in his profile, which fine, but his Instagram was linked to his profile and it had many pictures of his kids, which hmm.

My cousin is getting married tomorrow. I’m excited! I’m the youngest cousin on this side, so I didn’t totally appreciate weddings… emm, the open bar… when I was in high school when a bunch of them got married, ha ha.

I have a coffee date with a wine sommelier/hospitality professional Sunday. Again, he seems nice enough and I think cute, though it’s hard to say. He sent a lengthy but interesting and thoughtful first message too which is so rare on Tinder. But in that moment, it all flashed before me — we’ll go on a date, it’ll be nice, maybe we’ll go on another date, it’ll be fine but no chemistry, and it’ll end. Just like all my other dates. I think this is a sign I should deactivate. Well, after this guy. And I’m averaging like a date/guy a month so it’s not that time consuming or what not although for me it does take some mental space.

I’m sorry he’s ghosting/avoiding you @copa. I think your connection was real. There might just be other stuff going on his life. Which doesn’t make it OK to not send you a quick text, but it’s not on you.

I am also really sorry @ale. I know you want to blame yourself, but he’s being entirely unreasonable. Good on you for changing your Amazon password (what a joke!). Yes, it’s another week, but in the long scheme of things, you have so much more time not to deal with him.

Saturday night guy has officially not replied. Which is cool, not everybody is for everybody. I’m a tad annoyed though that he didn’t “read” the message according to read receipts. It’s as if the message is left hanging, although I know. I don’t use read receipts, but clearly he does. But confession, I didn’t reply to two guys who texted after a first date a couple years ago. I was young (not really). I felt bad. I was just stupid, rude. So maybe I have one more non-reply and then my dating karma can balance out again.