Kate
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If you don’t know what to say, why did you ask to talk to her?
No offense, but you two don’t seem to be able to communicate. I don’t see how you’d be able to make a relationship work without the ability to even talk. These kinds of conversations after you’ve broken up are actually usually some of the easiest to have.
Maybe say you’ve been taking time to think, but it’s difficult to concentrate what with all the flames she’s throwing at you on the internet.
What do you want to say?
Here’s the thing. I’m not confused about anything she’s doing. But I have no idea, after 3 posts, what your agenda even is. Since you don’t seem to know, just be like, hey, I hope you’re doing well. I miss you, and have been thinking about you / us.
And then… I don’t know what. You could ask if she’s upset with you because you’re seeing some pass-agg tweets coming from her direction.
You could ask if she’d like to get together to talk about what went wrong.
You could say you hope there may be a chance in the future but right now you need to be on your own and do some reflecting and maturing.
I don’t know. What do you want???
Do what you want to do, Chance.
I’m honestly not confused about any of this.
The “why” was referring to why THREE posts about this same situation.
Omg! I had a boss who started acting nuttier and more erratic, like really bad, and HE had a baseball bat too. He’d swing it hold it up menacingly if you tried to ask about promotions or raises or whatever.
After a perfect storm of events that kicked off with a 23-year-old crying, he got fired and I got a 20% raise on the spot.
I also got his office, and I found his notecards in a drawer. Some of them had normal inspirational quotes, but others were absolutely whackadoo, like “I’m the Michaelangelo of Market Research.” Some weird relationship stuff and religious ones too.
It’s nothing, just an Instagram account I started a while back… someone was looking for a way to post pics for people to see, without giving their identity, so I said just start a finsta (fake insta, look it up, all the kids are doing it). Then because I was bored, I started one myself that is all drinks. A few people were into it. I could use it to post pictures of things like KTFran’s wedding, potentially.
@katesfinstaaaaah
All right. I do support you.
Yeah. Well I hope this works for you. Sincerely.
You sent him a letter laying out a specific timeline that you’d like, which has a proposal “in the New Year,” I.e, Jan/Feb. that’s how I’d take it. In no way did I read what you wrote as an ultimatum. I still think it wasn’t a great idea to throw that all in a letter with no plans to discuss for months. YMMV. As an adult in a relationship, you need to be able to have these conversations.
I think you did push him with that letter. I’m talking about some damage control.
I think it’s weird that he used your work email to follow up after a date. At first I was like, oh hell no! But I re-read and saw that you met at a work happy hour. Still. That’s a no. The “come visit me at my office” is strange also.
Two dates is enough… if you’re feeling kinda chased down and also not that excited about seeing him again, don’t. And don’t feel bad.
And yeah, you shouldn’t have gone to his house.
