Stonegypsy
Forum Replies Created
-
Posts
-
Update on the physicist: I went to watch him carol on the outdoor mall last night, then he came over in the middle of the night and spent the night (because I said I was cold), then I played hooky and we spent all day today together, and did that 36 questions thing. By far the most intense initial 48 hours of a relationship that I have ever experienced. I’m absolutely giddy. Like, I can feel the NRE settling in like a rosy haze around my senses and it’s awesome.
@Veritek it’s so hard to plan dates around Christmas. Sounds like things are going well, though! Call him Army Guy (National Guard Guy just doesn’t roll off the tongue or fingers).
I think part of what makes me hesitate to do the trill spots is that part of it would be a face tattoo (even though it would be around the edge, and the color of freckles). As I plan to eventually go into IT consulting, that might not be the best move for me. But I really want to!
Also re: tattoos – anyone else here a Star Trek: DS9 fan? I really want to get trill spots tattooed. I’ve been thinking about it for 11 years, but it would be such a long, expensive project that I haven’t ever actually gone for it.
Oh man, a tattoo parlor black tie party sounds awesome! And @Veritek all those ideas are great!
I have been lurking on here and not really contributing, cause I’ve been crazy busy but I really really want to gush about the date I had last night. I haven’t been this excited about a new person in two years, and there was just instant chemistry and great conversation and the excitement seems to be mutual. He is working on his PhD in physics and he sings and is super geeky (tabletop games and books yay!) and has a really nice body and was a great kisser.
I have gone on so many dates where even if I enjoyed it well enough, I didn’t really care if I saw them again and my general feeling was pretty ‘meh’. I totally forgot what it felt like to actually be into someone
That would be a great party. I’d go to MO for that.
@LadyE That sucks! But everyone else is right. That guy was practically made of red flags, and not flesh and blood. Spend some time feeling sorry for yourself, and then thank the heavens that you didn’t have to waste anymore time on him.
@ktfran that’s so exciting! Hope everyone gets along@Veritek Yayyy that you get to see TT this weekend!
For myself, I am mostly paying zero attention to dating, but I’d met a guy I liked and so we have a third date lined up for Friday. I’m going to cook dinner and we’re going to watch Dr. Horrible’s Sing-Along Blog because he’s never seen it before. I haven’t been spending any time on tinder, though, and my okcupid profile is disabled. If this guy doesn’t end up working out, I won’t be crushed, and I’m going to just continue to mostly not date unless something pops up.
@Ver since your place isn’t unpacked, what if you threw some dusty tarps over some boxes and furniture to make it seem like the place was abandoned and might be haunted?
@MoneyPenny @BlueKate
Yeah, I’m taking the next few months (at least) completely off from dating. I just don’t have the emotional bandwidth for romance right now. Problem is I have an incredibly flirtatious personality, it’s just how I talk to people, and it gives people the wrong impression. But it takes a lot of effort to not.
Oh man, @Shakeourtree that really sucks 🙁
I fortunately have not had to deal with much of that (even the pushy guy took the ‘I don’t think we should see each other again’ quite well). But I have been there before, and that’s really exhausting and stressful to deal with. Are you able to block his number?
Yeah, I’m going to an exhibit opening party at the museum on Friday evening, and a movie/game night on Saturday, but other than that I don’t have anything. So I will probably make myself a nice breakfast and go for a bike ride on Saturday, and spend Sunday being super low-key. A bubble bath sounds pretty wonderful. And maybe some cross stitching and movies.
I don’t want to start a whole new thread for this, I just want to whine for a moment –
I have had a lot of… ambiguous relationships in the last year. Mostly very very casual, mostly platonic relationships with some physical aspects (cuddling, occasional sex). There’s one in particular where the physical attraction was definitely stronger on his end and I wasn’t really acknowledging it and was mostly attributing it to stress in my main relationship. We don’t see each other very often, but most of the last several times we’ve gotten together I have declined sex. It was bound to come to a head eventually.
We got together last night. I’m not in a great place right now due to the breakup a few weeks ago, which he knows. I told him that I’m not really up to romantic connections at the moment and that for the time being I am voluntarily celibate. Well… he brought up the fact that I’ve been declining sex and I said that part of it has been has been timing and stress but I also admitted (to both of us) that while I do think he’s very attractive I’m not necessarily super attracted *to* him. I felt awful, he took it well and said that he still wants to hang out with me but is just going to change his default assumption when we do. So, it’s good! The result was great. But it was an awkward and exhausting conversation and between that, and having to break things off the other with the pushy guy I’d gone out with a couple times because he kept asking to hang out even though I told him I wasn’t going to be making plans for awhile, and another friend of mine trying to kiss me and things there getting awkward, and the breakup.. I’m just tired. I feel completely emotionally drained. And I don’t think I have any other ambiguous relationships that are going to need difficult conversations anytime soon and I am not even remotely interested in dating again for the next few months, and this situation was entirely my fault for not acknowledging my own feelings about him, but it feels like it’s been one thing after another.
Blah 😛
@LadyE Agree with everyone else that not paying for a single drink when the only reason you were there was so he wouldn’t be there alone is a flag (and not at least offering to pay the time that you picked up the check is another one). Not necessarily a dealbreaker, but enough that it would give me pause.
I’ve decided to just stop dating for awhile. I haven’t been fully single in a decade, and I am *really* enjoying being able to binge on alone time and not have to entertain anyone else for awhile. I had gone out on a couple of dates after the breakup, and I liked both of them. When I decided to take a break, I sent each a text letting them know that I was going through something rough and wasn’t going to be making any plans with romantic intent for awhile, and I wasn’t sure how long. The response from one: “Do what you need to do. I can be patient for good things. Get back in touch with me when you’re ready.” The response from the other… I won’t go into it, but it was a 15 minute text interrogation about why I felt the need to do that, had something happened? Anything else? Was it something specific? Was I sure he couldn’t change my mind?
Not sure I’m going to call that guy again when I’m ready to date. It was exhausting.
@Snoopy, probably wouldn’t be too difficult to make. I’ve actually been thinking about making myself a bath tray. All you’d really need is one piece of wood that rests comfortably across the bathtub and then another slightly shorter than that, glue them together and you’re set.
I mostly just want to be able to play computer games in the bath. It would solve all of my bath-related problems.
