veritek33
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@Copa – we don’t speak but I didn’t have much of a relationship with her before all of this. MofV spoke to her for the first time in two months last week because she announced she is having TWO receptions after her Disney wedding and we needed to know the dates for those in order to not plan anything on those days.
Bottom line is his parents told us to proceed and don’t let her change our plans so that’s what were doing. We are having a small wedding with 45 people invited and she can either be happy for us or not come. His mom is going with us Sunday before pictures to meet the new coordinator at the winery and see the space and she’s very excited about it and that makes me happy. We can’t change his sister as a person and if everyone else is happy for us, she just has to get on board.
We also just got our friend to agree to be our officiant and hired a violin duo to play during the ceremony so things are getting exciting!
Congratulations K! Sounds like everything went well!
As of yesterday we are 5 months away from our wedding and taking engagement pictures this Sunday so that’s exciting!
LadyE – congrats to you too! MofV and I exchanged I love you’s almost 10 months into dating. I knew it sooner than that but I’m never the one to say it first and he isn’t either so we stubbornly were both waiting for the other one to say and we got drunk on Cinco De Mayo and both said it lol.
Cleo I’m so sorry. But I’m so proud of you for making the choice you had to and being an adult about it rather than trying to eek out another year or force something that wasn’t working.
It’s okay to be sad. You’re gonna be sad for a while. And then things are going to get better each day and you’ll be less sad. And I’m excited for that day for you. The day when you see it’s all worth it.
Please take good care of yourself and do some pampering. Remember to eat. Drink some water. Rest. Take care of you. Best of luck on your housing search <3
@Copa that’s wonderful! What will you possibly do with all the time you can spend together? lol
Oh Jimmy. As much as I would love to stoop to your level since you seem to love to hate me – I won’t. I will hope that you find someone as wonderful and amazing as my fiancé who loves me unconditionally and supports me and has been the best thing to ever happen to me.
Sincerely, I hope you have that. It will make you a happier person.
@Ale that super sucks – he sounds terrible and so glad you blocked him.
For anyone waiting on an update – MofV talked to his parents, laid down some ground rules and said we’re going to do what we want for our wedding. Turns out his parents are 100% supportive of us, don’t know what’s gotten into the sister, and have told us not to change a single plan for her. She’s been slamming doors and refused to speak to them for a week because they didn’t “forbid us from getting married on xx/xx”.
So it’s now up to his family to determine if she’s even invited to our wedding.
However, we toured a courthouse yesterday and fell in love with it and I think that’s what we are going to do. We’ll have the ceremony with parents and grandparents and then go down the road to the winery and have the brunch with our smaller guest list.
I’m twice her size so I like my chances in the fistfight, tbh.
That’s a great reminder Portia, we do need to look into all those things and discuss them.
MG- I’m feeling a ton less anxious today. We really had a good talk last night and laid out all of our options and we have some choices to make. He is also gathering his thoughts and would like to meet with his parents and sister to discuss what happened. I will not be present for that discussion.
I’m picking the brain of my friend that stayed in a resort in Santorini and looking up go fund me options to get BGM to Orlando next spring…
It’s a delayed reaction but it’s progress I suppose. He’s being very analytical about it and wants to write it out so that he remembers what he wants to say if things get heated again.
Sorry Lianne I didn’t word it well, just to say that I don’t have much beyond the house and what I do have doesn’t have his name on it as a beneficiary yet.
MG – I am trying to have a decent relationship with my in laws, or at least I was until Sunday. I adore his mother and I think the sister bullies her too, so I do want to be “polite” but I’m tired of being “nice” to her at least.
When they got engaged I got her a basket of wedding magazines and a fun cup and things I knew she’d like to celebrate, I’ve asked about all her plans, asked about her dress, etc., wanting to express interest and be involved. Anything she’s asked me about my wedding was so that she could turn it around on me during this dinner Sunday night.
Oh I understand Lianne, just saying there’s not much to take. But it’s worth considering and I can have an attorney friend let me know my options for sure.
You’re both right – there is a lot to unpack here. And yes Wendy you got most of that right. His parents and sister live about two hours away, so far enough I don’t have to see them often but close enough we are involved in each others’ lives.
And we do agree on counseling and we need to find a good one soon. He’s not really had to step up to defend us before, but he definitely didn’t when the time came, and that was very disappointing. He’s very thoughtful about things like that and he didn’t want to blow up in front of his grandpa (yeah grandpa was at dinner too during all this) and so he was trying to reign it in (his words.) Though, I still wanted him to say something to either end the discussion or defend our choices and he didn’t. So that’s definitely a problem. His mom was telling me how he’s really come out of his shell since meeting me and become so much happier, and I think some of it is because he’s left that house.
The house is in my name and I’m not sure about the laws in my state regarding that so I will look into that. In my will all my other stuff is left to a friend and her kids.
