Quickies: “Is My Ex Really In Love with His New Girlfriend?”

I was in a long distance relationship for the past seven years (I’m 29, he’s 28) and had trouble fully committing to making plans for a future together. Just as I was finally making a choice, my boyfriend broke up with me before I could tell him I picked him and wanted to move to him. Now, only three weeks later he is seeing a new girl (25, blonde, party type) partying at clubs, bars, buying her roses, and even planning a trip/vacation together. Are they actually in love? Or is this a rebound? I always thought by giving him time he would be able to work things out and maybe we…

Your Turn: “He Wasn’t There When I Got an Abortion”

In a feature I call “Your Turn,” in which you, the readers, get to answer the question, I’m presenting the following letter without commentary from me: I was seeing this guy, “Jake,” for a couple months, and though the times we spent together were great, he and I never went out — it was always me going to his house. Even when he talked about the future, it was generic and he always needed to talk to me about some court date, his ex- girlfriend, and other things, like he just needed an ear. Jake broke up with his ex two months before he and I started hanging out because he said…

“My Brother is Vulgar Around My Children”

Growing up, my mom and older brother always had a strange connection. He had some health issues when he was younger, which led to her coddling him throughout life. I used to be pretty resentful of this, but it doesn’t bother me much any more. (I’m in my early thirties and have two toddlers. I don’t have much time to mope about childhood favoritism!). Unfortunately, my brother and I have very little in common. He’s extremely bitter and negative. He’s nearing forty and is unmarried with a dead-end career. I limit the time I allow him to spend around my children because he is incredibly vulgar. He often talks about graphic sex…

Quickies: “I Don’t Want to Blow All Our Money On Our Wedding!”

My boyfriend and I got engaged a month ago after dating a year. His proposing was the happiest day, but ever since then I have been stressing over the idea of money. I am terrified to share with him how little money I have actually saved over the years, scared of him running away or looking down on me that I cannot contribute so much to our wedding and future. I have taken on a second job in hopes to add some more to my bank accounts, but he keeps telling me I don’t have to work another job. How do I tell my fiancé I am scared to get married for…

“Is My Girlfriend Going to Cheat on Me in Vegas?”

I am dating a girl, “Theresa,” who is 35 and I am 45 (I look a lot younger), Neither of us has ever been married. We have been together for seven months and things are serious. She is going to Vegas for a bachelorette party with her sister (31) who is completely narcissistic and influential on Theresa. There will be four of them, including Theresa’s best friend, who is very, very tight and married. Theresa went to a sex shop in the Manhattan last week to bring things to Vegas and, I am not embellishing — I swear she got condoms. Over the last few months I have heard talk of male…

“Is a 40-Year-old Bachelor Capable of Commitment?”

I saw an article the other day about what a man’s romantic past says about him and it echoed some of the concerns I have about the history of the guy I’ve been seeing for a couple of months (let’s call him “Mark”). If a guy is over 40, never married (though may have come close and been in some multi-year relationships), but seems to have been through many many relationships over the years, what are the chances he’s capable of maintaining a healthy long-term relationship that could lead to marriage? Is it even possible? Has he just not found the right one, or at this point is it likely he never…

“How Do You Know When You’ve Found ‘The One’?”

Your relationship with Drew seems lovely. How did you know for sure he was the person you wanted to marry/spend your life with/share your love with? Please don’t say ‘I just knew’! I know in some ways this question is ‘over done,’ but maybe you have an interesting perspective! And even if you did absolutely ‘just know,’ what would you recommend for people who are inevitably natural doubters/analyzers — people who may deep down ‘just know’ but who inevitably question the ‘just knowing’? I suppose I’m interested in your personal experience, rather than a generalized one, because I think generalized explanations of ‘How to know he is Mr. Right’ can be a…

“My Boyfriend is having a Baby with Another Woman”

My boyfriend and I have been dating since February, and I just found out on Twitter that he is having a baby girl due in October. When I first found out I was so angry and didn’t know what to do. When I asked him about it, he lied but later that day told me the truth. He said he didn’t know how to tell me and he thought that it would hurt me — and it did, dearly. I decided to stay with him, and now I’m thinking that’s a terrible decision. I can’t accept the baby. But I love him so much, and he tells me he loves me too….

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